So, there I was in one of the subterranean hallways of the T during the commuter rush, getting propelled toward the turnstiles by the mob, when suddenly the throng pushed me into oncoming traffic in the form of one enormous individual. He was more than six feet tall, easily 300 pounds, and apparently blind ( Read more... )

Couple boards elevator, boyfriend notices that contents of the elevator are several attractive women.

Boyfriend: Every man's dream!

Women: (good-natured laughter)

Girlfriend: (smiles, then) Hey...

One of the Women: Glad to have made your day.

Boyfriend: (looking at girlfriend) She already has.

Women: Awww...

I met the most amazing kid this weekend. He's 16, and he's deeply into graduate work at MIT. On Saturday night, he delivered a lecture on Ray Kurzweil's theory about singularity--not the totally loopy, swallowing hundreds of supplements a day stuff, but the interesting mathematical trend projections similar to Moore's Law ( Read more... )

I just discerned the operating principle of a company I've started working with: We'll disappoint you until your expectations are as low as they can get before you cancel your account, then we'll give you the bare minimum. And you, fool that you are, will be so relieved that we finally came through--and you didn't lose your job due to our slow/ ( Read more... )

Scene: the train I rode in to work this morning ( Read more... )

Migraine pain substituted for my alarm clock this morning--worse than the monotone bird whose testing pattern kicks in at first light--and on the way to work, PMS hormones kept pushing pathetic little tears against the lower perimeters of my eyes. My heart felt too heavy to carry around in my chest ( Read more... )

The train I rode this morning paused under an overpass, giving me a chance to read and ponder graffiti messages such as "Pussy Fart." (I'm hoping someone will chime in and say, "No way, you ride the Pussy-Fart train? Me, too!" Who knows? There may be one in every city ( Read more... )

What?! Will's out?! Sigh...

Well, here's hoping Katee wins.

A copy of the 2008 AP style guide is in my hot little hands. Wheeee!

I went to Burger King late yesterday afternoon to get a Mocha Joe (heaven in a cup). As I was walking away from the counter with my precious purchase, a youngish guy at a table with a group of friends said, "We saved a place for you right here," pointing to the seat next to him. I think the appropriate response would have been to ignore him, and if ( Read more... )