(no subject)
Hi.
Remember me?
My name is Cassondra and I'm the worst driver ever.
Nobody is ever going to trust me driving ever again. It took me over a year of being accident free to shake the stigma of being a bad driver, and now I've blown it again. I was driving too fast on snowy roads, hit a patch of ice and went careening off the road into someone's mailbox. The car spun around and I couldn't stop the spinning before I slid backward into a mailbox and spun again in someone's yard. I drove away because it was dark and late, and I couldn't even tell where the mailbox was that I'd hit. I broke off my mirror on the passenger's side, bent the fuck out of the wheel and messed up the tire, and dented the door bad enough to where it doesn't really close all the way now.
The worst part about all of this is that Amanda was with me, in the passenger's seat where it hit. The last two accidents I was in I was by myself. Neither of us got hurt, but the thought that I could have possibly killed her horrifies me to the point of never wanting to drive again. I could barely get over that after my last accident back in October 2011, and I was alone. I'm pretty sure I went fucking batshit insane after it too, you probably remember all my crazy posts. It's everything; the money it's going to cost to fix that I don't have, the thought of how easily I could have killed her if we'd hit a tree or something, the fact that I'm absolutely the worst driver I know and certainly everyone else feels the same way... Once Amanda's mom finds out, she's never going to let Amanda ride with me again. Fuck.
Yeah, I know I only use my journal when something is wrong, but I don't know where else to talk about it. My family talks to me like I'm a horrible person, Amanda won't even talk to me about it at all, and people on tumblr certainly don't care. I don't know if I have friends here anymore, but I just needed a place to vent about it. Sorry I'm a downer.
Remember me?
My name is Cassondra and I'm the worst driver ever.
Nobody is ever going to trust me driving ever again. It took me over a year of being accident free to shake the stigma of being a bad driver, and now I've blown it again. I was driving too fast on snowy roads, hit a patch of ice and went careening off the road into someone's mailbox. The car spun around and I couldn't stop the spinning before I slid backward into a mailbox and spun again in someone's yard. I drove away because it was dark and late, and I couldn't even tell where the mailbox was that I'd hit. I broke off my mirror on the passenger's side, bent the fuck out of the wheel and messed up the tire, and dented the door bad enough to where it doesn't really close all the way now.
The worst part about all of this is that Amanda was with me, in the passenger's seat where it hit. The last two accidents I was in I was by myself. Neither of us got hurt, but the thought that I could have possibly killed her horrifies me to the point of never wanting to drive again. I could barely get over that after my last accident back in October 2011, and I was alone. I'm pretty sure I went fucking batshit insane after it too, you probably remember all my crazy posts. It's everything; the money it's going to cost to fix that I don't have, the thought of how easily I could have killed her if we'd hit a tree or something, the fact that I'm absolutely the worst driver I know and certainly everyone else feels the same way... Once Amanda's mom finds out, she's never going to let Amanda ride with me again. Fuck.
Yeah, I know I only use my journal when something is wrong, but I don't know where else to talk about it. My family talks to me like I'm a horrible person, Amanda won't even talk to me about it at all, and people on tumblr certainly don't care. I don't know if I have friends here anymore, but I just needed a place to vent about it. Sorry I'm a downer.