semester one, 2009
Semester starts today. Lucky me also get my text books today. Five of them, all up, plus two CDs and a study guide. Blackboard for human biology was already online last week, but blackboard for social psych and stats came online today, and I've written down the suggested study guide for stats because I didn't get a booklet in the mail. I don't know why, but the stats coordinator just didn't feel like making one up and sending it out. Instead it's all online, which is cool, but I do like knowing things like when assessments are due and when I should study what topic and in what order before the day semester starts. So now I have the suggested study timetable written in my diary, with what topic I should start studying each Monday. And when my online labs and assignments are due.
This semester is looking huge. Of course next semester will be exactly the same. I'm really going to put some effort in this time. I don't want to do it completely part time, because that will take at least another six to eight years, plus honors, and I want to get it done relatively quickly. I can't study full time because I don't have enough hours in the day. So I'm doing in between, with three units. It's still going to be a fair load for me. I did three units first semester last year, but this is more because those three units were simple; one didn't even have an exam. So this year is going to be big, especially with stats. I was good at math, but not really that great at stats. I guess I'll have to try really hard though, I have to do it, there's no way around it. And once I'm done with this unit, I won't have to do stats again.
And I just realised that my reading load for stats just doubled, because when I wrote all the chapters in my diary I didn't take into account the second stats text book that I have. Lots of math for me. Yay. At least I get bio and psych to balance that out. Bio is going to be great, and psych will be good too. I love psych, but I think I love bio more, but in a way I need to do psych. I love bio, but I just love science in general. I love psych in a different way. I need to do it, because it's become such a big part of my life. And I don't think I'm smart enough to do any sort of science degree. Actually, I know I could do it, it's just that the mark that I got which dictated what uni degrees I got accepted into disagreed. So now I live vicariously through Ally, who turned down the opportunity to cut up dead people! Ugh. I don't think I'll ever get over that.
So I haven't done any study today. I got up at 4:30am, tired as hell, after trying unsuccessfully to go to sleep at around 8pm (I don't think I made it until 9:30pm or some time like that). I worked for ten hours, which wasn't so bad, but I'm pretty tired. And for some odd reason I have sore legs from the stairs, which like never happens, so I mist be tired. I got home at 3:30pm, and Mark was home because he felt sick. He told me he'd be at home, and technically he wasn't home when I got home, he was at the doctors, but he was home soon after. And I was on Facebook catching up with people and reading blogs and generally just recovering from my work day. And I didn't get my text books until Jason dropped them around at 5:30pm because he had them mailed to his PO Box. And then Mark and I cooked dinner and ate and now it's 8pm and at least I've done something uni related today because I'd be off to a bad start if I hadn't.
Tomorrow I'm going to the laundromat with Mum, and no that is not weird or random or anything. We've made a plan to get together and do random things each second Tuesday when I don't work. Tomorrow we are going to the laundromat to wash our quilts, because now that we both have front loader washing machines, quilts don't fit. And then I don't know what we'll do the next fortnight. Maybe start some hard core cleaning on her house, sort out some of her shit, clean out her shed maybe. Cooking would be good, cause there's lots of meals that she makes that I want to make, but she makes them off the top of her head because she adds extra things in and doesn't have recipes written down and all that.
Besides going to the laundromat and washing quilts, I'm going to do some study tomorrow. I might start on stats first, so that I can enjoy bio later on in the week and forget about stats. Also, on Wednesday I have an appointment with another psychologist, but I'll fit more study time in there. Thursday I work and Friday will be more study, as will the weekend. I won't over do it though, there are still plenty of other things to do, like reading and house work and spending time with Mark.
I'm not quite as nervous as I thought I would be about this appointment. I'll probably be anxious about it when I'm there. I'm guessing it's because I don't think I really need it anymore, like I've beaten the most of it, or so I think. I've had a couple of tough situations, and Eden would have been proud of how I reacted, but does that mean I'm over it? I honestly think it does. I'm thinking differently, I know that. I can tell that I am thinking and reacting to things differently, and I am more positive and light hearted about things. I know I might not be over it, but I know that the worst has come and gone. There's still that thing in the back of my mind that tells me that being depressed is interesting and maybe people will like me because I have a sad story, but I know well enough now not to listen to those thoughts because I know they're not true. I know now that people like me for other reasons. And I know that I can be interested without being depressed.
On a completely unrelated topic; Mark was so sick yesterday. Serves him right though. I think he'll have learnt his lesson by now. I just left him alone all day to sleep after he came home.