Shit happens...
I've been saying that a lot to myself today...
And I don't know how to feel about recent events. Should I be angry? Sad? Nervous? Should I care at all? Do I look on the positive side of it all?
I'll clue you in on what I'm rambling about...
So my backpack was stolen yesterday at around noonish. It had the following items: Laptop (which had all my school stuff on it, plus like $300+ worth of software), my camera, my notebooks with final exam material, and my sketch pad. These are the things I was sad about loosing. I also had a graphing calculator which I never used, my iPod charger, etc. Luckily the only things I didn't have in my bag were my cellphone, iPod, and my wallet.
The story goes like this, we were cleaning out the car, my sister and I. I put my backpack on the ground next to the back-left wheel. I sit in the passenger seat and go through the glove compartment and in the armrest to get out all the junk. My sister tells me to get my backpack, then proceeds to ask me if my mother called (my sister had just lost her phone the night before at a bar and was relying on me as her go-between) so I get distracted and forget about the bag. We pull away and right before she drops me off on campus, I remember that I never picked up my bag. We return to the carwash, it's gone.
This is where I start to bottle up my anger at my family. Firstly, my sister was standing RIGHT NEXT TO MY BAG, yet she decided to not be a good sister, let alone person, and pick it up and put it in the back seat. No instead she tells me to do it, while I'm working on something else. After I helped her when she was drunk, after I basically cleaned the apartment for her, after I let her drag me around everywhere looking for her damn phone, THAT IS HOW SHE REPAYS ME. I know it isn't fair to push all the blame on her, but then she tried to push all the blame on me. So when I noticed it wasn't there and that the cashier at the neighboring gas station hadn't seen it, I knew that it was gone. Someone had to have taken it. Now if they turn it in to the police station, that's awesome. Though I know how people work, especially the people we were around when we were cleaning out the car. If they found it, I guarantee they are looking for ways to use the stuff in there. It's also a possibility that it's just lying in their car right now, just sitting there.
So my Mom wants to tell me that I don't care about loosing it. It's not that I don't care, because I fucking do. I just don't get overly worked up about it. My grades won't suffer, and I'll buy a new (better) computer when I get my scholarship money in January.
That's what makes me mad though. It's stupid too, but it makes me angry all the same. I loose/break something ONCE, and I get the shit end of the deal. I always have to pick up the peices by myself. I don't know if my parents realize this, but they really haven't done a lot for me in terms of finances. The first cellphone I ever got was a piece of crap, it fell apart along with my mother's (it was the same model). So she wasn't hesitant to buy a new one for me and my sister (I should mention that this phone was her 4th). And I was happy with it, it was awesome. Then, just this spring, it gets stepped on in the dressing room during one of my shows. The last day, I slid it open, the screen was cracked and broken. I thought it was fine, I could still call people and what not. But then, when I came home, I flipped out. My mother never put insurance on it like she said she would. Then she told me to hold out with it being broken, till she insured it, then I could go get the same type of phone. It doesn't take 2 months to insure a phone.
So finally I gave up and went to buy myself one (which they didn't even attempt to fund) which cost me $60. I would've just asked for a new one for my birthday, but apparently graduating with Honors and a 32 ACT and getting into Auburn on a free ride doesn't deserve an actual graduation gift. I say that because my mother said that my laptop counted as my graduation gift + my birthday gift. It was less than a grand. My sister's laptop she got for graduation? Was at least $1,200. (I will say my mother DID fund for me to go to New York that spring break, and it was a $500 trip...so I will give a lot of leeway on that.) Back to the phones, so my sister get's 4 free phones (I say free meaning she didn't directly pay for them) and I get 2. Every one of my sister's phones had to be replaced based on her throwing it against a wall, or her loosing it while drunk. My phones had to be replaced due to no direct fault of my own, one was just shitty, the other one was stepped on in a dressing room, in my pants, which were knocked on the floor by some other actor.
So I am taking full responsibilty for the loss of my backpack, I plan on having everything replaced by the start of next semester, even if that means I start out the school year broke.
Luckily, the most important thing on that computer was my Producer Project from Theatre, which my professor gave me an extension on. So I can easily recreate that. I still have my flash drive which has all my Writing stuff for my Research Paper, and it has my SEM and other stuff for my Biology project. (Honest to whatever diety is out there, I'm almost glad I get the chance to get a new computer, that one was getting too cluncked up with junk).
I've just been creeping up on depression more and more these days. I know I will never become clincally depressed because I know better than that. It's just that having no one to share my time with, no job, and now my life is flipped upside down because of one seemingly insignificant occurance. Well, it'll be hard work, but I'll get through it alright.
Anyways, IM me if you want to chat, if you don't know my AIM sn is Ark Karafutoken. I will mainly be on my cellphone, so if it says mobile, don't worry go ahead and IM me.
*ruff* and all that jazz.
P.S. If you are wondering how I'm even doing this without my computer, I'm using my mother's tablet PC, which is really cool. I suggest getting one if you have the money just lying around.
And I don't know how to feel about recent events. Should I be angry? Sad? Nervous? Should I care at all? Do I look on the positive side of it all?
I'll clue you in on what I'm rambling about...
So my backpack was stolen yesterday at around noonish. It had the following items: Laptop (which had all my school stuff on it, plus like $300+ worth of software), my camera, my notebooks with final exam material, and my sketch pad. These are the things I was sad about loosing. I also had a graphing calculator which I never used, my iPod charger, etc. Luckily the only things I didn't have in my bag were my cellphone, iPod, and my wallet.
The story goes like this, we were cleaning out the car, my sister and I. I put my backpack on the ground next to the back-left wheel. I sit in the passenger seat and go through the glove compartment and in the armrest to get out all the junk. My sister tells me to get my backpack, then proceeds to ask me if my mother called (my sister had just lost her phone the night before at a bar and was relying on me as her go-between) so I get distracted and forget about the bag. We pull away and right before she drops me off on campus, I remember that I never picked up my bag. We return to the carwash, it's gone.
This is where I start to bottle up my anger at my family. Firstly, my sister was standing RIGHT NEXT TO MY BAG, yet she decided to not be a good sister, let alone person, and pick it up and put it in the back seat. No instead she tells me to do it, while I'm working on something else. After I helped her when she was drunk, after I basically cleaned the apartment for her, after I let her drag me around everywhere looking for her damn phone, THAT IS HOW SHE REPAYS ME. I know it isn't fair to push all the blame on her, but then she tried to push all the blame on me. So when I noticed it wasn't there and that the cashier at the neighboring gas station hadn't seen it, I knew that it was gone. Someone had to have taken it. Now if they turn it in to the police station, that's awesome. Though I know how people work, especially the people we were around when we were cleaning out the car. If they found it, I guarantee they are looking for ways to use the stuff in there. It's also a possibility that it's just lying in their car right now, just sitting there.
So my Mom wants to tell me that I don't care about loosing it. It's not that I don't care, because I fucking do. I just don't get overly worked up about it. My grades won't suffer, and I'll buy a new (better) computer when I get my scholarship money in January.
That's what makes me mad though. It's stupid too, but it makes me angry all the same. I loose/break something ONCE, and I get the shit end of the deal. I always have to pick up the peices by myself. I don't know if my parents realize this, but they really haven't done a lot for me in terms of finances. The first cellphone I ever got was a piece of crap, it fell apart along with my mother's (it was the same model). So she wasn't hesitant to buy a new one for me and my sister (I should mention that this phone was her 4th). And I was happy with it, it was awesome. Then, just this spring, it gets stepped on in the dressing room during one of my shows. The last day, I slid it open, the screen was cracked and broken. I thought it was fine, I could still call people and what not. But then, when I came home, I flipped out. My mother never put insurance on it like she said she would. Then she told me to hold out with it being broken, till she insured it, then I could go get the same type of phone. It doesn't take 2 months to insure a phone.
So finally I gave up and went to buy myself one (which they didn't even attempt to fund) which cost me $60. I would've just asked for a new one for my birthday, but apparently graduating with Honors and a 32 ACT and getting into Auburn on a free ride doesn't deserve an actual graduation gift. I say that because my mother said that my laptop counted as my graduation gift + my birthday gift. It was less than a grand. My sister's laptop she got for graduation? Was at least $1,200. (I will say my mother DID fund for me to go to New York that spring break, and it was a $500 trip...so I will give a lot of leeway on that.) Back to the phones, so my sister get's 4 free phones (I say free meaning she didn't directly pay for them) and I get 2. Every one of my sister's phones had to be replaced based on her throwing it against a wall, or her loosing it while drunk. My phones had to be replaced due to no direct fault of my own, one was just shitty, the other one was stepped on in a dressing room, in my pants, which were knocked on the floor by some other actor.
So I am taking full responsibilty for the loss of my backpack, I plan on having everything replaced by the start of next semester, even if that means I start out the school year broke.
Luckily, the most important thing on that computer was my Producer Project from Theatre, which my professor gave me an extension on. So I can easily recreate that. I still have my flash drive which has all my Writing stuff for my Research Paper, and it has my SEM and other stuff for my Biology project. (Honest to whatever diety is out there, I'm almost glad I get the chance to get a new computer, that one was getting too cluncked up with junk).
I've just been creeping up on depression more and more these days. I know I will never become clincally depressed because I know better than that. It's just that having no one to share my time with, no job, and now my life is flipped upside down because of one seemingly insignificant occurance. Well, it'll be hard work, but I'll get through it alright.
Anyways, IM me if you want to chat, if you don't know my AIM sn is Ark Karafutoken. I will mainly be on my cellphone, so if it says mobile, don't worry go ahead and IM me.
*ruff* and all that jazz.
P.S. If you are wondering how I'm even doing this without my computer, I'm using my mother's tablet PC, which is really cool. I suggest getting one if you have the money just lying around.