(no subject)
He doesn't make me feel anxious.
He doesn't make me feel sick.
He doesn't make me feel not good enough.
He makes me feel just right.
He makes me feel worth something.
He makes me feel like I have potential.
I know he loves me. And that's all that really matters to me right now. I know that he's not going to leave me, he's not going to lie to me or hurt me in anyway. Ever. I know this. And for the first time since high school, I'm truly and completely not afraid of my boyfriend. I've found him, but most importantly, I've found my very best friend.
School is...school.
Nothing incredibly exciting. My painting professor is...pretty tough. He's known for being pretty tough, but he wants us to be our best. I'm just scared I'll be ridiculed all year. He emphasizes that he's actually being easy on us and that the art world is brutal. But I'm not aiming to be an art star in the art world. I just want to go to school for art therapy or psych and be a therapist...or something, I really don't know, but if there is something I know, it's that I don't want to be in the art world. It's too competitive and self-motivating. I'm the kind of person that is most motivated when others are depending on me. There's no way I can create things when there is not a need, purpose or someone depending on me for it. I work better when there is a need for interpersonal interaction.
Sigh.
Ooh! made my first print this weekend! Wee! Now on to the next i guess.
He doesn't make me feel sick.
He doesn't make me feel not good enough.
He makes me feel just right.
He makes me feel worth something.
He makes me feel like I have potential.
I know he loves me. And that's all that really matters to me right now. I know that he's not going to leave me, he's not going to lie to me or hurt me in anyway. Ever. I know this. And for the first time since high school, I'm truly and completely not afraid of my boyfriend. I've found him, but most importantly, I've found my very best friend.
School is...school.
Nothing incredibly exciting. My painting professor is...pretty tough. He's known for being pretty tough, but he wants us to be our best. I'm just scared I'll be ridiculed all year. He emphasizes that he's actually being easy on us and that the art world is brutal. But I'm not aiming to be an art star in the art world. I just want to go to school for art therapy or psych and be a therapist...or something, I really don't know, but if there is something I know, it's that I don't want to be in the art world. It's too competitive and self-motivating. I'm the kind of person that is most motivated when others are depending on me. There's no way I can create things when there is not a need, purpose or someone depending on me for it. I work better when there is a need for interpersonal interaction.
Sigh.
Ooh! made my first print this weekend! Wee! Now on to the next i guess.