i hate boys
so i am extremely depressed and pissed...i mean i was so fuckin happy to, i mean i talked to drew last night and i was all happy about that (although i told him somethings that i probably shouldn't have...oopsies!)...and then i had fun today with matt and cristian, and all....we watched a movie, it was weird as all hell...and matt showed me and mom the movies that he made...and they are hella good...he is so talented...and umm yeah so i kinda like drew still...but so not important...and it pissed me off because tim told me i can't like drew, or miss him, and i might not even get to see him when he gets out here...well chris squashed it first...he tells me how much he is in love with me and blah blah blah...and then he tells me he is on the phone with some girl who is tellin him what she would do to him, and that she has good ideas, and that he would do it, but he would close his eyes so he could picture me...i mean what the fuck??? i cannot believe i ever even...ewww....nasty!!!!!!! i am beginning to hate the kid all over again!!!!!!!!!!!! and then tim yells at me because i am tellin this kid that i love him because i do, but i just don't love him how he loves me...so yeah...and then he tells me that i fucked up, and that it will keep getting worse and shit but whatever fuck that...and so i have done something i am so against...i don't say i love you to him, even though i do love him...so fuck..now i am going against myself...fuck!!!! so i wanna fucking cry now...but whatever...and i have to go finish my homework now so yeah...oh and i am pissed about this weekend...but whatever...so bye bye for now...love ya'll...
~love always and forever~
**amy**