back from writing hiatus

[kittylefish]

so this evening i noticed the date.  it went something like this:  wait ... what?  september 1st?  ooooooohhhhhhhhh nooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!  yes, my self-imposed deadline for resuming writing arrived today.  so there i was, scrambling to find the files where i'd hidden my wips and the files with feedback from the beta that i got way back in may or june or whenever it was, before i went off to new york.  i swear, when i opened the snupin file and started to work on it, i had such anxiety i literally wanted to cry and/or give up and throw in the towel.  it seemed completely impossible that i would ever be able to find my way back to caring about the story, let alone the story itself.  gradually, i found myself rewriting chapter 1, attempting to incorporate beta's suggestions.  i wasn't that concerned with word count, but in the end, by the time i revamped the chapter, i'd written 531 words, so i even managed to meet the goal of 500+ words.

it reminded me of that first watercolor class i took when i first moved out here more than ten years ago.  i sat there looking at the blank sheet and the paints, and i felt completely terrified of putting brush to paper.  i remember whispering to my aunt, who was sitting next to me, "i'm afraid of my paints."  ah, the terror of the blank page, i know it well.

anyhow, i'm glad i'm back on the horsie as far as writing goes.  that means there's hope i may actually finish these dang stories one of these days.  *crosses fingers, toes, and eyes*