bored.
lately things have been weird. i havent been thinking as much, but feeling much more than normal.
ive officially got some parts of my life straightened out, for the better i might add. subtracted a few people from my friends who i care about genre, and carefully noted extra appreciation to the ones who werent subtracted.
classes are so boring today. sometimes i wanna quit school. other times i think what a fool id be if i did, then other times, i couldnt care less. its SO COOOOOLLLLLLDDDDD here its unbelievable, i am extrememly uncomfortable. all i could think about the entire time during one class, was getting out of there so i didnt freeze to death. it was that bad. i didnt hear a damn word he said either. just concentrated on how cold i was and how i couldnt stop shaking and i felt like i was going to die.
it upsets me to talk to all my friends and hear how sad they are about their lives on a general basis. i just wish more people would be happy, at least seem happy, for my sake of faith. i see all these people who deserve so much more than i do, and theyre sitting there miserable, and i just feel like giving up all hope that anything ever works out right. giving up hope that "theres a reason for the things that happen." no no, that hope was destroyed along with my sanity.
theres so much to do and so little time to do it. its like i have 8 hours to do something that requires 16 hours for me to do, but i have to get it done in 8. its crazy and its hard and stressful. i dont know how many times ive fallen asleep today. just sitting there, sitting up straight. its purely insane.
kim and meeshel are having their party tonight so thatll be pretty exciting. everyones gunna be drunk or stoned, so i dont know how much im looking forward to that. who knows.
i really feel like i need to step back and evaluate my life. some recent events have caused me to see the cracks in the truth. if theyre there, i want to find them.
well since im sitting here falling asleep again, im just gunna give it up.
<3<3heather
ive officially got some parts of my life straightened out, for the better i might add. subtracted a few people from my friends who i care about genre, and carefully noted extra appreciation to the ones who werent subtracted.
classes are so boring today. sometimes i wanna quit school. other times i think what a fool id be if i did, then other times, i couldnt care less. its SO COOOOOLLLLLLDDDDD here its unbelievable, i am extrememly uncomfortable. all i could think about the entire time during one class, was getting out of there so i didnt freeze to death. it was that bad. i didnt hear a damn word he said either. just concentrated on how cold i was and how i couldnt stop shaking and i felt like i was going to die.
it upsets me to talk to all my friends and hear how sad they are about their lives on a general basis. i just wish more people would be happy, at least seem happy, for my sake of faith. i see all these people who deserve so much more than i do, and theyre sitting there miserable, and i just feel like giving up all hope that anything ever works out right. giving up hope that "theres a reason for the things that happen." no no, that hope was destroyed along with my sanity.
theres so much to do and so little time to do it. its like i have 8 hours to do something that requires 16 hours for me to do, but i have to get it done in 8. its crazy and its hard and stressful. i dont know how many times ive fallen asleep today. just sitting there, sitting up straight. its purely insane.
kim and meeshel are having their party tonight so thatll be pretty exciting. everyones gunna be drunk or stoned, so i dont know how much im looking forward to that. who knows.
i really feel like i need to step back and evaluate my life. some recent events have caused me to see the cracks in the truth. if theyre there, i want to find them.
well since im sitting here falling asleep again, im just gunna give it up.
<3<3heather