Succumb to change
I think my problem is that I am depressed. That is where this all stems from. Bleak outlook on life, torturous morbid thoughts of death and disease, loneliness. That is what made this spiral out of control to the point where I am now at my mom's trying to get a new perspective on life.
It is day 5 of my new doses of medication and I'm beginning to see that I am not myself. Laurel told me but how could I believe it if I couldn't feel anything? Even my mom remarked I am a robot lately and need a personality. They're right; I've been numb and speechless.
I went to lunch and the used bookstore with my mom today. It was nice to get out but her driving concerned me. She said this was because I drive like a granny. I like to think I drive carefully, that is all. I think its funny someone granny aged drives like someone my age, and someone my age drives like she should be driving. Just another backward ploy on life's part to get me to smile, I assume.
I miss Laurel and like talking to her while I am here. She makes me smile. I remember our good old days and I want to do what I can to bring that back again. She is my everything.
It is day 5 of my new doses of medication and I'm beginning to see that I am not myself. Laurel told me but how could I believe it if I couldn't feel anything? Even my mom remarked I am a robot lately and need a personality. They're right; I've been numb and speechless.
I went to lunch and the used bookstore with my mom today. It was nice to get out but her driving concerned me. She said this was because I drive like a granny. I like to think I drive carefully, that is all. I think its funny someone granny aged drives like someone my age, and someone my age drives like she should be driving. Just another backward ploy on life's part to get me to smile, I assume.
I miss Laurel and like talking to her while I am here. She makes me smile. I remember our good old days and I want to do what I can to bring that back again. She is my everything.