Zoolander
I was thinking about a Ben Stiller movie the other night. That one where he does Blue Steel and talks in a really annoying voice. That's it - Zoolander.
I was thinking about this while I was standing in my lounge room, wearing bright yellow rollerskates. I was also wearing knee pads, elbow pads and wrist guards.
It popped into my mind because I was practising turning on my rollerskates. I can totally turn already - just not while staying on my feet. So I was hoping to build on my already obvious skill.
See, Zoolander has a problem. He can't turn left. We have that in common, along with a few other traits (like being really, really, ridiculously good looking).
Back and forth I rolled, up and down my teeny tiny laminate-floored lounge room / kitchen area. Eventually I mastered the right turn, but the left? It didn't come easily. I started thinking that I'm not an ambi-turner.
This was disheartening. Particularly since last weekend I went to watch Perth Roller Derby do their thing. Those ladies can skate. I don't feel too bad, because I've only been skating for about two months. If I could put on skates and kick ass like those girls straight away it wouldn't be so satisfying to get better bit by bit.
I also don't mind falling down and getting a few bruises, as long as I've seen even the tiniest improvement. The other night I put on a pair of shorts and realised I had matching bruises - one at the outside top of each leg. I hadn't had any massive stacks during my weekend skating adventures, so where had these bruises come from?
Ahhhh. I thought back to when I was attempting shoot the duck. I can do the stoop skate (one step down from shoot the duck) but I have not yet mastered being able to crouch down, lift up one foot and extend my leg out straight while still rolling. That's not quite true. I can get to that point, but then when I try to stand up, I fall down. And I do it with flair. I managed to end up lying stretched out on my side on the floor on Sunday after a failed attempt at shoot the duck. I think I landed on my butt and then rolled sideways.
So that probably explains one of the bruises. But the other one? Oh. That's right. One of the women who is in the skating class above me offered to partner up with me for a skating activity I hadn't done before. The skating rink has all of these chairs (the plastic hard kind from school) without legs. They have wheels instead. You would think it would be simple enough to sit in a chair and get pushed, but it really isn't. Especially not when you have a speed demon pushing you along yelling "lean, lean, lean!" at you, because you didn't realise that's how you steer the chair. We had two near misses with children and one with a wall. All three times I was forced to bail out of the chair, diving onto the floor and commando rolling in order to avoid injuring them or myself (I wouldn't care so much about the kids except that their parents are watching). Yep, bouncing across the floor could definitely account for those matching bruises.
But you know what, those bruises are totally worth it. And I hope I get some more, because then I know I'm learning more and getting better.
So that's what I was thinking in my lounge room trying my best to turn left. It wasn't easy, but none of the best things are. In the end I managed a pretty poor turn, without much flair or confidence to speak of. But I'll keep practising. If I can't master the left turn I could turn my attention elsewhere. Like maybe starting some sort of Centre For Kids Who Can't Skate Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too.
Just a thought.
I was thinking about this while I was standing in my lounge room, wearing bright yellow rollerskates. I was also wearing knee pads, elbow pads and wrist guards.
It popped into my mind because I was practising turning on my rollerskates. I can totally turn already - just not while staying on my feet. So I was hoping to build on my already obvious skill.
See, Zoolander has a problem. He can't turn left. We have that in common, along with a few other traits (like being really, really, ridiculously good looking).
Back and forth I rolled, up and down my teeny tiny laminate-floored lounge room / kitchen area. Eventually I mastered the right turn, but the left? It didn't come easily. I started thinking that I'm not an ambi-turner.
This was disheartening. Particularly since last weekend I went to watch Perth Roller Derby do their thing. Those ladies can skate. I don't feel too bad, because I've only been skating for about two months. If I could put on skates and kick ass like those girls straight away it wouldn't be so satisfying to get better bit by bit.
I also don't mind falling down and getting a few bruises, as long as I've seen even the tiniest improvement. The other night I put on a pair of shorts and realised I had matching bruises - one at the outside top of each leg. I hadn't had any massive stacks during my weekend skating adventures, so where had these bruises come from?
Ahhhh. I thought back to when I was attempting shoot the duck. I can do the stoop skate (one step down from shoot the duck) but I have not yet mastered being able to crouch down, lift up one foot and extend my leg out straight while still rolling. That's not quite true. I can get to that point, but then when I try to stand up, I fall down. And I do it with flair. I managed to end up lying stretched out on my side on the floor on Sunday after a failed attempt at shoot the duck. I think I landed on my butt and then rolled sideways.
So that probably explains one of the bruises. But the other one? Oh. That's right. One of the women who is in the skating class above me offered to partner up with me for a skating activity I hadn't done before. The skating rink has all of these chairs (the plastic hard kind from school) without legs. They have wheels instead. You would think it would be simple enough to sit in a chair and get pushed, but it really isn't. Especially not when you have a speed demon pushing you along yelling "lean, lean, lean!" at you, because you didn't realise that's how you steer the chair. We had two near misses with children and one with a wall. All three times I was forced to bail out of the chair, diving onto the floor and commando rolling in order to avoid injuring them or myself (I wouldn't care so much about the kids except that their parents are watching). Yep, bouncing across the floor could definitely account for those matching bruises.
But you know what, those bruises are totally worth it. And I hope I get some more, because then I know I'm learning more and getting better.
So that's what I was thinking in my lounge room trying my best to turn left. It wasn't easy, but none of the best things are. In the end I managed a pretty poor turn, without much flair or confidence to speak of. But I'll keep practising. If I can't master the left turn I could turn my attention elsewhere. Like maybe starting some sort of Centre For Kids Who Can't Skate Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too.
Just a thought.