Housewives: Welcome to the Neighborhood 1/?
Title Housewives of Torchwood Lane: Welcome to the Neighborhood
Topic Torchwood/Doctor Who (Desperate Housewives in name only. No connection to actual show)
Characters Everyone Torchwood and Doctor Who -verse
Pairings Pretty much every pairing under the sun. This chapter, mainly Jack/Ianto, Jack/John, Ianto/Lisa
Genre AU, drama
Rating PG-13
Beta None. All mistakes are my own
Summary Torchwood Lane: deceit never looked so damn good
Authors Note So. I had this idea like AGES ago, and finally decided to write it. This won't be updated regularly, I'll tell you that now. Every once in a while when I have time to write these. This first piece, "Welcome to the Neighborhood" will introduce everyone in a short stand-alone like this, and then everyone will converge at the end. Then I'll post long-fics later. Basically, this is like Desperate Housewives, Torchwood style. Woot. Enjoy!
Neither of them could hold on any longer, and they both cried out, the words that left their lips names of people not in the room with them. Both of them noticed, but neither minded. That was how things like this work, after all.
Jack collapsed onto Ianto, panting hard; high off of the release he had just been granted. Between breaths he attacked the younger man’s skin, licking and kissing the pale flesh from his neck to his nipples, but never biting. They weren’t allowed to leave marks - it was one of their many unspoken rules.
Ianto put up with it for a while, his recovery stinted by the sensation that Jack was feeding him. After several moments, however, he found that he was having difficult breathing thanks to the weight of the man on top of him, and roughly shoved him to the side. Jack slid off without argument, landing on his back in the bed next to Ianto. He brought his hands up and rested his head on them, staring at the ceiling as his breathing slowly came back to normal. His chest rose and fell deeply, timed with his gasps.
Ianto wasn’t in much better of a shape. Still breathing hard, he rolled over onto his side and slung his arm over Jack’s bare chest, running his fingers over the smooth artificially tanned skin before stopping over his heart, which was beating erratically. Ianto pulled his body closer so that he was molded against Jack’s side, and rest his head on the man’s arm, closing his eyes and finally bringing his breathing back to a normal level. He softly pressed his lips against the skin directly under Jack’s armpit, and he felt the man chuckle as the laugh reverberated through his body.
“Tickles.” Jack muttered, squirming a bit. Ianto smiled and darted his tongue out, licking the spot that his lips had just caressed. A very unmanly squeal slipped from Jack’s mouth, and he pulled away. Ianto tightened his grip on the man’s side and used Jack’s momentum as leverage to swing himself on top of the man, straddling his hips and sitting on him, a very naughty smirk on his face. He looked at Jack’s face - saw the wild hair specked with premature gray, the deep blue eyes that could leer and sooth at the same time. He saw the stubble peppering his chin, the slightly orange glow that spoke of the tanning salon. He looked lower and saw a defined chest, shaved and glistening with sweat. On an impulse, Ianto reached out with his finger, determined to trace the long, nasty scar that wound it’s way across Jack’s chest, the only flaw on an otherwise perfect man. It started on his back and circled around the front of his stomach, disappearing down the side of his hip. The flesh around it was twisted and bunched up. His fingers were a centimeter away from the raised skin when Jack’s hand snapped out, grasping Ianto’s wrist in a painful hold. “Don’t.”
Ianto blinked and snatched his hand back, shaking his head and glancing at the bedside table. It was early afternoon, a little after one in the afternoon. The light that was coming through the window caught the wedding ring that lay next to the clock, and Ianto stared at it, the shiny golden band prompting him to ask a question. “What time do you have to go?”
Jack’s body twisted, and Ianto felt it move under him. The man glanced at the clock then settled back down, this time reaching his hands out, settling them on either side of Ianto’s waist. “John doesn’t get back until later - photo shoot in town.”
Ianto bit his lip, and the feeling of jealousy tumbled about in his stomach. He shoved it down, and instead of saying anything, leaned forward, capturing Jack’s lips in a kiss. It was meant to be sweet, but with them, nothing ever was, and it ended up turning into a heated snog. Ianto’s hand began to move lower on its own accord, and he reveled in the gasp that came from Jack as he stroked him. Ianto started to move lower, leaving a trail of sloppy kisses down his lover’s stomach when the sound of a car pulling into the driveway caused them to freeze.
“Shit.” Ianto moaned, reluctantly pulling himself away from Jack. Rolling off the bed, he walked over the window and peaked out. Recognizing Lisa’s car, his eyes grew wide and he turned around. “Fuck - Lisa’s home.”
Jack sprung into immediate action, jumping off the bed and grabbing his clothes, yanking on his pants and shirt over his head, not bothering to tuck it in as he pulled on his suspenders. Ianto scrambled for his boxers and yanked them on, quickly shedding the sheets from the bed as Jack finished gather up his things. The man clawed for the ring on the bedside table and slipped it onto his ring finger. The sound of a car door slamming wafted into the room as Jack checked himself in the mirror and Ianto finished bundling up the bedding and took new sheets from the closet. Not enough time to replace them, he left them sit there and pushed Jack out of the room.
Heels hit concrete as the woman from outside walked nonchalantly to the house. Ianto shooed Jack to the back door. At the last second Jack grabbed him and shoved him against the wall, their bodies melding together as he pressed their lips together in a searing kiss. Jack pulled away as abruptly as he mashed them together and gave a smirk before disappearing out the back door.
Not having enough time to stand their and savor the taste of Jack in his mouth, Ianto turned and rushed back up the stairs, going into his office instead of the bedroom. His heart raced as a key slipped into the lock on the front door, and Ianto urgently thrust his hand into the nearest pot of half-ground coffee. Holding his breath, he threw the grounds into his face, making sure to rub some into his hair, sprinkling more onto the carpet. Cursing at how long it would take him to get the grains out of the fiber, Ianto sprinted into his bedroom, giving one last quick glance before hopping into the bathroom, turning on the shower and slipping out of his boxers.
“Ianto, sweetheart?” Lisa’s voice reached Ianto’s ears as he slipped under the water.
“Shower!” He called, letting out a huge breath of air as he rested his head on the side of the shower wall, allowing the water to beat down on him, erasing the scent of Jack from his body. Cum and sweat mixed with coffee beans as the water washed them down the drain.
A knock came at the door, and Ianto stuck his head out of the curtain in order for his words to be heard more clearly. “Hold on!”
He scrubbed furiously at his hair and lathered on body lotion, rubbing it over his body and his hair, making sure he got the smell of Jack off of him before Lisa saw him. Soap gone, he turned off the shower and stepped out onto the tile, grabbing a thick white towel and wrapping it around his waist before going to the mirror. Without bothering to look, he scrubbed his teeth good and well, making sure to get his tongue and the roof of his mouth too. He spit, rinsed, then ran a hand through his black spiky hair before turning and entering back into the world.
“Sorry about that - my coffee exploded.” Ianto said, giving an apologetic smile.
Lisa giggled and ran her hand through his hair before planting a soft kiss on his lips. Ianto held his breath, waiting to see if she tasted anything or realized that his lips were still slightly swollen. “I see that.” Her hand came away with remnants of coffee grinds, and Ianto let out his breath.
“What are you doing home so early? If I knew I would have been dressed, at least.” Ianto said, striking up a conversation while he picked up the soiled sheets from his early afternoon activities and pushed them out of the way so he could start putting on the fresh ones. Lisa sat down her bag and moved to help him, walking around to the other end of the bed.
“Something came up.” Lisa said, something in her voice causing Ianto to glance at her. She wasn’t forthcoming, so they fell into a comfortable silence, fixing the bed. Ianto continued to steal glimpses, loving her big brown eyes and light chocolate skin - he would tease her sometimes about how her hair was shorter than his was, and how he missed having something to run his fingers through. He thoughts turned to the thick brown hair that he had been playing with only minutes ago, and he blinked hard to rid his mind of that image. He needed to compartmentalize.
They finished, and Ianto moved to grab some clothes, intent on getting dressed. “Are we planning on going anywhere, or should I just throw something on?”
“We’re going to Jack and John’s party tonight, remember? I promised them we’d show up.” Lisa pointed out, and Ianto immediately switched his thoughts from casual attire to something more fancy. His hand unconsciously grabbed at his black pinstriped suit with the deep red shirt - Jack was always telling him it was his favorite.
“You mean you promised John you’d show up.” Ianto pointed out, not unkindly. Lisa giggled.
“Come on Ianto! He’s a bloody model! I’m taken, not blind.” She walked up to him and wrapped her arms across his bare wet chest, her fingers playing with the fine hairs on his skin, not caring that her designer jacket was getting ruined as she kissed his ear. Ianto sighed and leaned into her. “Plus - I’m allowed to window shop - it’s not like I’d actually do anything, I love you too much.”
Ianto swallowed and pulled away. Sometimes it was hard, when she brought it up like that, even though she had no idea. He covered his start by unwrapping his towel and using it to dry himself off before slipping into his clothes. His red shirt went first, then he grabbed a fresh pair of briefs.
“Ianto, I do want to tell you something though.” Lisa said, reaching out and softly grabbing him on the wrist. He glanced at it, and for a moment he felt the ghost of Jack’s painful grasp. The feeling quickly passed.
“Hmm?” Ianto hummed, wanting to have the decency of wearing pants before they began this talk. For a moment, the Welshman worried that she might have found out - maybe she had tasted something after all - or had she seen Jack leave the house?
But she just pulled him on the bed and sat next to him, leaning on him and putting her head on his shoulder. He absentmindedly started to run his fingers up and down her spine. “You know how I went to Owen last week because of headaches and nausea?”
“Yeah.” Ianto said, suddenly worried. He pulled away and looked at Lisa. She was staring right back at him, and what he saw confused him. She was crying, tears were running down her cheeks. But she was also smiling, which meant.
Oh god. Please no.
“I’m pregnant.”
Topic Torchwood/Doctor Who (Desperate Housewives in name only. No connection to actual show)
Characters Everyone Torchwood and Doctor Who -verse
Pairings Pretty much every pairing under the sun. This chapter, mainly Jack/Ianto, Jack/John, Ianto/Lisa
Genre AU, drama
Rating PG-13
Beta None. All mistakes are my own
Summary Torchwood Lane: deceit never looked so damn good
Authors Note So. I had this idea like AGES ago, and finally decided to write it. This won't be updated regularly, I'll tell you that now. Every once in a while when I have time to write these. This first piece, "Welcome to the Neighborhood" will introduce everyone in a short stand-alone like this, and then everyone will converge at the end. Then I'll post long-fics later. Basically, this is like Desperate Housewives, Torchwood style. Woot. Enjoy!
Neither of them could hold on any longer, and they both cried out, the words that left their lips names of people not in the room with them. Both of them noticed, but neither minded. That was how things like this work, after all.
Jack collapsed onto Ianto, panting hard; high off of the release he had just been granted. Between breaths he attacked the younger man’s skin, licking and kissing the pale flesh from his neck to his nipples, but never biting. They weren’t allowed to leave marks - it was one of their many unspoken rules.
Ianto put up with it for a while, his recovery stinted by the sensation that Jack was feeding him. After several moments, however, he found that he was having difficult breathing thanks to the weight of the man on top of him, and roughly shoved him to the side. Jack slid off without argument, landing on his back in the bed next to Ianto. He brought his hands up and rested his head on them, staring at the ceiling as his breathing slowly came back to normal. His chest rose and fell deeply, timed with his gasps.
Ianto wasn’t in much better of a shape. Still breathing hard, he rolled over onto his side and slung his arm over Jack’s bare chest, running his fingers over the smooth artificially tanned skin before stopping over his heart, which was beating erratically. Ianto pulled his body closer so that he was molded against Jack’s side, and rest his head on the man’s arm, closing his eyes and finally bringing his breathing back to a normal level. He softly pressed his lips against the skin directly under Jack’s armpit, and he felt the man chuckle as the laugh reverberated through his body.
“Tickles.” Jack muttered, squirming a bit. Ianto smiled and darted his tongue out, licking the spot that his lips had just caressed. A very unmanly squeal slipped from Jack’s mouth, and he pulled away. Ianto tightened his grip on the man’s side and used Jack’s momentum as leverage to swing himself on top of the man, straddling his hips and sitting on him, a very naughty smirk on his face. He looked at Jack’s face - saw the wild hair specked with premature gray, the deep blue eyes that could leer and sooth at the same time. He saw the stubble peppering his chin, the slightly orange glow that spoke of the tanning salon. He looked lower and saw a defined chest, shaved and glistening with sweat. On an impulse, Ianto reached out with his finger, determined to trace the long, nasty scar that wound it’s way across Jack’s chest, the only flaw on an otherwise perfect man. It started on his back and circled around the front of his stomach, disappearing down the side of his hip. The flesh around it was twisted and bunched up. His fingers were a centimeter away from the raised skin when Jack’s hand snapped out, grasping Ianto’s wrist in a painful hold. “Don’t.”
Ianto blinked and snatched his hand back, shaking his head and glancing at the bedside table. It was early afternoon, a little after one in the afternoon. The light that was coming through the window caught the wedding ring that lay next to the clock, and Ianto stared at it, the shiny golden band prompting him to ask a question. “What time do you have to go?”
Jack’s body twisted, and Ianto felt it move under him. The man glanced at the clock then settled back down, this time reaching his hands out, settling them on either side of Ianto’s waist. “John doesn’t get back until later - photo shoot in town.”
Ianto bit his lip, and the feeling of jealousy tumbled about in his stomach. He shoved it down, and instead of saying anything, leaned forward, capturing Jack’s lips in a kiss. It was meant to be sweet, but with them, nothing ever was, and it ended up turning into a heated snog. Ianto’s hand began to move lower on its own accord, and he reveled in the gasp that came from Jack as he stroked him. Ianto started to move lower, leaving a trail of sloppy kisses down his lover’s stomach when the sound of a car pulling into the driveway caused them to freeze.
“Shit.” Ianto moaned, reluctantly pulling himself away from Jack. Rolling off the bed, he walked over the window and peaked out. Recognizing Lisa’s car, his eyes grew wide and he turned around. “Fuck - Lisa’s home.”
Jack sprung into immediate action, jumping off the bed and grabbing his clothes, yanking on his pants and shirt over his head, not bothering to tuck it in as he pulled on his suspenders. Ianto scrambled for his boxers and yanked them on, quickly shedding the sheets from the bed as Jack finished gather up his things. The man clawed for the ring on the bedside table and slipped it onto his ring finger. The sound of a car door slamming wafted into the room as Jack checked himself in the mirror and Ianto finished bundling up the bedding and took new sheets from the closet. Not enough time to replace them, he left them sit there and pushed Jack out of the room.
Heels hit concrete as the woman from outside walked nonchalantly to the house. Ianto shooed Jack to the back door. At the last second Jack grabbed him and shoved him against the wall, their bodies melding together as he pressed their lips together in a searing kiss. Jack pulled away as abruptly as he mashed them together and gave a smirk before disappearing out the back door.
Not having enough time to stand their and savor the taste of Jack in his mouth, Ianto turned and rushed back up the stairs, going into his office instead of the bedroom. His heart raced as a key slipped into the lock on the front door, and Ianto urgently thrust his hand into the nearest pot of half-ground coffee. Holding his breath, he threw the grounds into his face, making sure to rub some into his hair, sprinkling more onto the carpet. Cursing at how long it would take him to get the grains out of the fiber, Ianto sprinted into his bedroom, giving one last quick glance before hopping into the bathroom, turning on the shower and slipping out of his boxers.
“Ianto, sweetheart?” Lisa’s voice reached Ianto’s ears as he slipped under the water.
“Shower!” He called, letting out a huge breath of air as he rested his head on the side of the shower wall, allowing the water to beat down on him, erasing the scent of Jack from his body. Cum and sweat mixed with coffee beans as the water washed them down the drain.
A knock came at the door, and Ianto stuck his head out of the curtain in order for his words to be heard more clearly. “Hold on!”
He scrubbed furiously at his hair and lathered on body lotion, rubbing it over his body and his hair, making sure he got the smell of Jack off of him before Lisa saw him. Soap gone, he turned off the shower and stepped out onto the tile, grabbing a thick white towel and wrapping it around his waist before going to the mirror. Without bothering to look, he scrubbed his teeth good and well, making sure to get his tongue and the roof of his mouth too. He spit, rinsed, then ran a hand through his black spiky hair before turning and entering back into the world.
“Sorry about that - my coffee exploded.” Ianto said, giving an apologetic smile.
Lisa giggled and ran her hand through his hair before planting a soft kiss on his lips. Ianto held his breath, waiting to see if she tasted anything or realized that his lips were still slightly swollen. “I see that.” Her hand came away with remnants of coffee grinds, and Ianto let out his breath.
“What are you doing home so early? If I knew I would have been dressed, at least.” Ianto said, striking up a conversation while he picked up the soiled sheets from his early afternoon activities and pushed them out of the way so he could start putting on the fresh ones. Lisa sat down her bag and moved to help him, walking around to the other end of the bed.
“Something came up.” Lisa said, something in her voice causing Ianto to glance at her. She wasn’t forthcoming, so they fell into a comfortable silence, fixing the bed. Ianto continued to steal glimpses, loving her big brown eyes and light chocolate skin - he would tease her sometimes about how her hair was shorter than his was, and how he missed having something to run his fingers through. He thoughts turned to the thick brown hair that he had been playing with only minutes ago, and he blinked hard to rid his mind of that image. He needed to compartmentalize.
They finished, and Ianto moved to grab some clothes, intent on getting dressed. “Are we planning on going anywhere, or should I just throw something on?”
“We’re going to Jack and John’s party tonight, remember? I promised them we’d show up.” Lisa pointed out, and Ianto immediately switched his thoughts from casual attire to something more fancy. His hand unconsciously grabbed at his black pinstriped suit with the deep red shirt - Jack was always telling him it was his favorite.
“You mean you promised John you’d show up.” Ianto pointed out, not unkindly. Lisa giggled.
“Come on Ianto! He’s a bloody model! I’m taken, not blind.” She walked up to him and wrapped her arms across his bare wet chest, her fingers playing with the fine hairs on his skin, not caring that her designer jacket was getting ruined as she kissed his ear. Ianto sighed and leaned into her. “Plus - I’m allowed to window shop - it’s not like I’d actually do anything, I love you too much.”
Ianto swallowed and pulled away. Sometimes it was hard, when she brought it up like that, even though she had no idea. He covered his start by unwrapping his towel and using it to dry himself off before slipping into his clothes. His red shirt went first, then he grabbed a fresh pair of briefs.
“Ianto, I do want to tell you something though.” Lisa said, reaching out and softly grabbing him on the wrist. He glanced at it, and for a moment he felt the ghost of Jack’s painful grasp. The feeling quickly passed.
“Hmm?” Ianto hummed, wanting to have the decency of wearing pants before they began this talk. For a moment, the Welshman worried that she might have found out - maybe she had tasted something after all - or had she seen Jack leave the house?
But she just pulled him on the bed and sat next to him, leaning on him and putting her head on his shoulder. He absentmindedly started to run his fingers up and down her spine. “You know how I went to Owen last week because of headaches and nausea?”
“Yeah.” Ianto said, suddenly worried. He pulled away and looked at Lisa. She was staring right back at him, and what he saw confused him. She was crying, tears were running down her cheeks. But she was also smiling, which meant.
Oh god. Please no.
“I’m pregnant.”