dang
Reading some old LJ entries from before the pandemic, my life seemed a lot more stressful with commuting every day, also having Dax, especially the period right before the pandemic when B's husband had moved back in so I was pretty much stuck with T at the house ALL the time. How I found time to exercise at all was a miracle. How did I run marathons??
I can't imagine going back to commuting every day, although it might happen before I can retire, who knows what a new administration might order us to do in 2025: all Feds back to office full time, no more telework!
I would never have survived as a private-sector attorney, working those long hours and weekends. And how do people have time to raise kids?
As a society we never used our advancing productivity to work fewer hours! Instead we collectively wanted more stuff, more stuff. Well, more specifically, the average hours worked per job has decreased since the 1950s, but with women entering the work force, the average hours worked per person has increased 40% over the past 60 years.
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Yet, the transition from commuting to pandemic quarantine was also stressful. But once I'd adjusted to it, I didn't want to return to commuting. We were getting the job done just fine remotely. Now that we're on a hybrid system, I ... I don't think I'm any more productive with some days in the office. I don't think anybody in my workgroup is more productive at the office than they were teleworking.
Sometimes I play around with the idea of not really having to retire yet when I turn 60, maybe continuing to work a few more years, especially if I'm fully enjoying my job at that point (which would require a better future Boss or perhaps a different role in my organization). But if we've been ordered back to the office full-time by then, I will absolutely retire on the day I turn 60 with no looking back.
Also, I'm not getting another dog (or dogs) until I retire. They're too much work.
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I'm pretty sure that T will want to continue working longer than I do, mainly because he won't be willing to reduce his consumption. He's thinking that he might "retire" from federal service at 60, but then continue working as a contractor for an even larger salary. That's fine, but we'll have a serious discussion about either selling the house and living apart, or changing how much I contribute toward the bills and who is primarily responsible for paying those bills.
But after his current job, T might not even come back to DC. I'm encouraging him to consider the world for his next job, literally the world. He'll have great experience running a large lab with 400 staff, there are labs like that all over the world. And he speaks French, so he could go to any country/region where people speak French (including 29 countries).
It is possible our2 relationship may become even more long-distance after he finishes his current job. If he continues working, but lives elsewhere full-time (instead of the current half-time), I could get used to living alone in this house, and then I could let K put the condo up for rent, and then I could have visitors here at the house whenever, and I could afford half+ of the expenses for this house well into retirement.
For many of these 19 years with T, he's needed me at least as much as I've needed him, but I've been trying to nudge him out of the nest. First in his relationship with K, although that was disastrous for him. Next in his relationship with B, although that's been rocky also. Now in his new job, which is working out fantastically for him. Fly, be free, T, work wherever in the world you want to work, form relationships with whomever you find. I'm always a phone call away, we can always get on a plane or train if there's an emergency. Live your life instead of being codependent.
I can't imagine going back to commuting every day, although it might happen before I can retire, who knows what a new administration might order us to do in 2025: all Feds back to office full time, no more telework!
I would never have survived as a private-sector attorney, working those long hours and weekends. And how do people have time to raise kids?
As a society we never used our advancing productivity to work fewer hours! Instead we collectively wanted more stuff, more stuff. Well, more specifically, the average hours worked per job has decreased since the 1950s, but with women entering the work force, the average hours worked per person has increased 40% over the past 60 years.
-----
Yet, the transition from commuting to pandemic quarantine was also stressful. But once I'd adjusted to it, I didn't want to return to commuting. We were getting the job done just fine remotely. Now that we're on a hybrid system, I ... I don't think I'm any more productive with some days in the office. I don't think anybody in my workgroup is more productive at the office than they were teleworking.
Sometimes I play around with the idea of not really having to retire yet when I turn 60, maybe continuing to work a few more years, especially if I'm fully enjoying my job at that point (which would require a better future Boss or perhaps a different role in my organization). But if we've been ordered back to the office full-time by then, I will absolutely retire on the day I turn 60 with no looking back.
Also, I'm not getting another dog (or dogs) until I retire. They're too much work.
-----
I'm pretty sure that T will want to continue working longer than I do, mainly because he won't be willing to reduce his consumption. He's thinking that he might "retire" from federal service at 60, but then continue working as a contractor for an even larger salary. That's fine, but we'll have a serious discussion about either selling the house and living apart, or changing how much I contribute toward the bills and who is primarily responsible for paying those bills.
But after his current job, T might not even come back to DC. I'm encouraging him to consider the world for his next job, literally the world. He'll have great experience running a large lab with 400 staff, there are labs like that all over the world. And he speaks French, so he could go to any country/region where people speak French (including 29 countries).
It is possible our2 relationship may become even more long-distance after he finishes his current job. If he continues working, but lives elsewhere full-time (instead of the current half-time), I could get used to living alone in this house, and then I could let K put the condo up for rent, and then I could have visitors here at the house whenever, and I could afford half+ of the expenses for this house well into retirement.
For many of these 19 years with T, he's needed me at least as much as I've needed him, but I've been trying to nudge him out of the nest. First in his relationship with K, although that was disastrous for him. Next in his relationship with B, although that's been rocky also. Now in his new job, which is working out fantastically for him. Fly, be free, T, work wherever in the world you want to work, form relationships with whomever you find. I'm always a phone call away, we can always get on a plane or train if there's an emergency. Live your life instead of being codependent.