So I think I have an ear infection. I haven't had one since I was like, 6 so I'm not a good judge. All I remember is crying my eyes out at a restaurant until my parents had to take me home ( Read more... )

So today I was reading weird medical articles, and found ALICE IN WONDERLAND SYNDROME. So I got all excited because, lol, Alice in Wonderland Syndrome. So I sent Frank the link and he immediately told me "I KNOW YOU LOVE ALICE IN WONDERLAND BUT PLEASE DON'T GET THIS". I was halfway through the article at this point and I went "Lol dude, I think it' ( Read more... )

Grandma's home, which is good ( Read more... )

So yeah. Wednesday night my Grandma ambulanced it up because of severe pain in her leg. Turns out she had a blood clot in her artery, and would have died/lost her leg if she hadn't come in when she did. So she went into emergency surgery Thursday morning with no problems. They figured out that her heart is beating irregularly, causing some blood to ( Read more... )

As you may or may not know, my whole family got sick with the plague last week (I held out the longest. I'm rad.) and my sister Nicole passed out trying to get to the bathroom to vomit everywhere, not once but twice, and went blind and I had to call 911 blah blah blah scary, ER, and then I was alone with Moe who vomited 13 fucking times until 5am ( Read more... )

I had a bunch of weird-ass really vivid sick dreams. Most of them were epic and full of adventure and awesome. But in one I was a prisoner of some fascist toy company and during interrogation some jackass with a tiny weenier was trying to force me to give him a blowjob, and I just started to laugh. He socked me in the face and yelled "What's so ( Read more... )

Today I learned that hearts are HILARIOUS ( Read more... )