actions do speak louder than words
actions do speak louder than words and for some reason I am hearing them, and I've come to realize that my relationship with John is over and that part of my life is over. My meltdown after seeing short bus (the realization that I'm so caught up about John is he has been the only guy in my life who made me feel like I should be the person that I wanted to be. He made me want to try, and comprimise and be...I don't know what was so different, he made me want more for myself) at the time I thought i deserved better than the relationship we were in, so you know. When I was feeling good about things I knew it wasn't right, but then without him I relapsed into believing less.
In any case, I put up my bullentin boards after I cleaned my room and I can think about him without feeling sad. As more time continues I'm hoping he'll pop into my head less, but I really think I'm finally okay.
In other news...I'm starting to look for new employment. I just can't get out of debt doing what I am doing now. I've done some looking on craigslist and things.I don't want to talk too much about things till the ball is more in motion. I just need to keep positive and motivated and things will all work out. Things always work out, even if it isn't what you want.
My knitting is improving vastly, it is even starting to look like a scarf! If I made all my scarves by hand it would be cool because they would all smell like me already. This one primarily smells like jergens lotion and my perfume : )
I'm very stressed out, but at the same time I feel very happy to just be,..for a lack of better word: alive. I guess there is no better reason than none
In any case, I put up my bullentin boards after I cleaned my room and I can think about him without feeling sad. As more time continues I'm hoping he'll pop into my head less, but I really think I'm finally okay.
In other news...I'm starting to look for new employment. I just can't get out of debt doing what I am doing now. I've done some looking on craigslist and things.I don't want to talk too much about things till the ball is more in motion. I just need to keep positive and motivated and things will all work out. Things always work out, even if it isn't what you want.
My knitting is improving vastly, it is even starting to look like a scarf! If I made all my scarves by hand it would be cool because they would all smell like me already. This one primarily smells like jergens lotion and my perfume : )
I'm very stressed out, but at the same time I feel very happy to just be,..for a lack of better word: alive. I guess there is no better reason than none