(no subject)
god i miss him
my mind has been racing. it can't seem to rest, all i can think about is what happened and what will happen.
i sometimes forget it's real
i went to see wedding crashers last night. i laughed, but it was hollow. of course all the really funny parts of the movie were shown in the previews. we used to hate that. and we hated those annoying people in the theater that laughed a little too loud or talked. when we would leave the theater we would chatter about our favorite scenes and how much we wanted to smack those people in the theater.
if he thinks about me does he miss me? or does he get so angry he pushes the thoughts right out of head.
i'm so excited and scared to see him sunday. there are so many things that i want to say but at the same time i have nothing. i just want to be in the same room as him again. i want to hear how he's been feeling and what he thinks of everything. i'll limit myself to one drink. one very large drink. alcohol makes me mushy, and mushy is the last thing i want to be around him.
i have such high hopes. i hope we can laugh and remember how we were together. i want to be able to hang out with him and his friends. lord knows i miss his friends, i loved them all and i loved how they would act around each other. i know he told matt, and matt wasn't surprised. he said there wasn't a time he didn't believe i wasn't cheating on him. i wonder if he told dave. i think dave would be a little upset, we got along really well and deep down he was pulling for us. or maybe i read everyone wrong.
thank god for work and friends. keeping busy is the only thing that keeps my mind off of him, but even though something as harmless as food shopping would remind me of all the times we cooked dinner and he'd slap my butt and run down the isle laughing.
man alive i miss that boy
my mind has been racing. it can't seem to rest, all i can think about is what happened and what will happen.
i sometimes forget it's real
i went to see wedding crashers last night. i laughed, but it was hollow. of course all the really funny parts of the movie were shown in the previews. we used to hate that. and we hated those annoying people in the theater that laughed a little too loud or talked. when we would leave the theater we would chatter about our favorite scenes and how much we wanted to smack those people in the theater.
if he thinks about me does he miss me? or does he get so angry he pushes the thoughts right out of head.
i'm so excited and scared to see him sunday. there are so many things that i want to say but at the same time i have nothing. i just want to be in the same room as him again. i want to hear how he's been feeling and what he thinks of everything. i'll limit myself to one drink. one very large drink. alcohol makes me mushy, and mushy is the last thing i want to be around him.
i have such high hopes. i hope we can laugh and remember how we were together. i want to be able to hang out with him and his friends. lord knows i miss his friends, i loved them all and i loved how they would act around each other. i know he told matt, and matt wasn't surprised. he said there wasn't a time he didn't believe i wasn't cheating on him. i wonder if he told dave. i think dave would be a little upset, we got along really well and deep down he was pulling for us. or maybe i read everyone wrong.
thank god for work and friends. keeping busy is the only thing that keeps my mind off of him, but even though something as harmless as food shopping would remind me of all the times we cooked dinner and he'd slap my butt and run down the isle laughing.
man alive i miss that boy