Domino
Nobody can tell me - I can't
Christmas 2012 present from someone in the past.
Dear Jon Snow,
Thank you for the memories. Thanks for the ups & downs - I shall not sing a song. Finally after an eternity of struggle, like French Revolution inside my brain. World War in my chest - I get to finally say "Fuckyeah I am better!" I clinged on to a spark of hope that we can fix our world - to no avail. I have loved you and I will always do, but its time to step forward. I will miss you. thanks for the last piece, now I am good.
The irony.
Things are comical from where I stand. That at one point, I just want to cry for it is too damn funny for my own liking. I wanted to have that last piece of memory for I know once I get it, I can finally tell myself - it is over. And a part of me does not want things to be over. Masochist self would just want stay where I am - no strings attached to anybody or anything but a thought of yesteryears. Well - it is over. And I had tears to celebrate for that ending - that glorious journey. I would even want to write on the back of it - Goodbye.
Hilarious how I transformed from an inglorious bastard to a sappy, greasy chiq all because of one man, and then I wish someone can let me stay that sappy. Maybe something in between proud & greasy. Not all extremes. I self destruct under too much of any given emotion. Well let the hunt begin!