I'm not going to wear shorts in the city!
Well...isn't this just a happy jolly reunion?! We've been apart far too long, livejournal and I. It's time to regain my position as Messed Up Doll #17...and it's going to start right now with my post entitled...
SHORTS IN THE CITY: THE LION KING'S TREK TO VICTORIA
So it had been almost 6 months since we had seen this darling face:
Alas, it was time for Miss Farhangi to venture over to the island for a weekend full of mayhem, madness and...triscuits?
So on Friday, after having a brief scare that I might not have my car for the weekend, Gavaa and I zoomed over to the ~*~*classy*~*~ Helijet (trailer) to pick Arshia up! What was the Persian Princess's first order of business? Use the men's bathroom, of course...typical.
We then headed downtown for some shopping and dinner at the Sticky Wicket! (where an obscenely drunk man was sitting far too close and Gavin and I got the DEFINITION of "CHICK DRINKS")
Arshia's lovin life!
Willy Wonka and Persian Pride
The remix: aww.
Middle-aged, dorky posers
After that, we headed over to Silvercity to see PIRATES: AT WORLD'S END!!!! After a few "WE'LL CUT EM DOWN! ARRR!", being sandwiched in between Triscuits for 2.5 hours, and finding our new BFFs named "Zebra" and "Fireworks", we FINALLY got to go in!
And it was...there are no words. Pirates is my life.
The next day, after some ho humming, we finally got on our way with our supposed-to-be-relaxed day, which, typically, turned out to be the opposite, as you'll find out.
We headed over to the old Humphries Cottage to pick up our beloved Luss de Uss, and we were on our way!
Backseat Buds
Oh, so the 4th Annual Fug Awards were held this past weekend! And guess who won for "CANDID OF THE YEAR"? No, it wasn't Natalia. Her possible prestigous 4-year-in-a-row winning streak was BROKEN by the new Fug in town...who, you ask? ELUSSABUTCH HUMPSTREES.
Oof. Now that's a face for radio.
After getting some Beacon ice cream, we went for a stroll along the water!
ConePals
A very "ehhhh..." group puc!
And again..."ehhhh..."
Sup Wickles?
Gavin and I put in our volunteer time for the weekend and took the challenged kids on a walk...any donation will help our cause...please. They need your help.
He got those lips like sugar cane!
Windswept Ogre and Little Miss Shuwwshine
Swallowed in the Sea
LOL @ Gavin: "yeeeeEEEAAAAAHHHHH PEACE!"
Demi would be proud, Gava.
Foreign Exchange Student being sexy
WARNING TO ALL PARENTS: This just in...there is a child rapist haunting Victoria's streets. He has been convicted of indecent exposure to minors more than 16 times, and is now on the loose in our quaint city. Please, keep all children indoors or monitored at all times...he's out there...waiting to prey on our innocent, VULNERABLE children...
Oh...and he may try to coax the younger and more naive ones with ice cream cones...that's his usual trick.
The Lion King
FlyAway, Wickles, and Ape
Such a serious Gava?
"What'd you say to me?"
"Me? Serious?"
"NUVUR, BUTCHES!"
Street Smartz
Who didn't work it out?
Gava. You can do better.
Aww...I <3 u too!
PLANTED, on all accounts.
Who didn't work it out?
Liz. You can do better.
So remember last Christmas when Gavin and I made a deathwish and walked out to the Breakwater in the middle of Hurricane Katrina?
Well...we decided to share the expurrience.
Breakwater Bonanza!
Twist and shout!
Electroshockabeth Humphries
Little Children
This isn't even fun.
Omg what! It's Ugly-Chick-With-Her-Hair-Tied-Back...in the DAYLIGHT?! It's like seeing an ugly-gorilla-with-its-hair-tied-back out of the zoo!
Liz and Arshia are having an awk convo.
Transcanada
Brown Brothas!
LOVE Arshia's new haircut. So 80's scene.
A long walkway, nice scenery...obv JUMPING PIC time!! May the best fug win.
Please donate to ALL involved.
Ooo...this is a tough one to call. On one hand, Arshia looks like she's a human pogo stick...on the other, Gavin looks like he's a pregnant and proud soon-to-be momma...
So I'm going to have to give 2nd place to...
And first place to:
Yup.
Liz gets points for Jazz Hands. Arshia gets an A for effort, D for originality, and a B+ for the new hairdo. Gavin gets scene points for his "I-need-a-bra" tits.
Hmmm...well...Gavin definitely has the most gravity-defying and impressive-looking jump here. But Arshia has the "mmyes." pose down...
But the winner just has got to be:
The pinky finger, blue socks with little black shoes, the Lord-of-the-Dance pose, the Wickles wisp, the purse, and ESPECIALLY the jacket-munching make this girl the WINNER!
Liz looks like she's lying down and was pasted in, Gavin's a little cannonball, and I'm flying a fighterjet with curved toes. It's a tie.
Arshia, y u so ~*~*beautiful*~*~?
Gavin's pissed because he's getting sniped with the mane wisps.
Gavin and Liz finally got to meet one of their idols that day: PERSIA MANPOWER! The wrestler and HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION!
That bulldyke gonna pound yo ass.
"Hee hee, my hood!"
"Ah fuck it."
Bus Driver and Bus
Gavin met an Arabian named Jafar! "OOOO!"
Liz: "Busty LaaaaaaaaaRue...."
Arshia: "It's the beautiful in the outdoor aerial view."
My favourite Suga Mamas
Gavin decided to learn an Arabian dance from Jafar...
Jafar: "Alright now poof out your bum!"
Gavin: "Alright..."
Jafar: "Now jump and GROWL! RAWR!"
Gavin: "RAWR!"
Jafar: "Now act like ET! PHONE HOME ET! PHONE HOME!"
Gavin: "Umm...ok...phone home ET...phone home...err..."
Jafar: "NOW FART!"
Gavin: "AHHH FART!"
Jafar: "Now jump and awkward handclap!"
Gavin: "OK YEAH!"
Gone with the Wind! Almost.
The Smiths
Flyaway and Rotund Olive
Down down down the only road I've ever known.
What's skinny AND round? GAVIN AND JUSTIN!
Peace, umma.
Stout, Truck and Fauxhawk
I pick bugs out of Lion King's mane while saying "myes."
Better!
Arshia: "You guys...that's the way survivor."
Liz: "Oh shit."
Exotica!
Disturbia!
Flyaway Wickles JerryCurl
Liz, you should so bring this hairstyle in. So scene.
33-year-old with Baditude
96-year-old with Tranitude
Jafar and Stroke Victim
Beastie and Foreign Exchange Student
So after dropping Liz off, we went back to Cruise Control!
Bitches in the Back.
We then headed over to...where else? THE ALL-FUN QUARRY!
Just how fun was it, you ask? ..........
Does that answer your question?
Somehow, after that, things got REALLY rushed...we had not too long before we had to meet Cherry Chun for dinner and still had to hit up the Le Chateau outlet, go home (to pick up the Shorts in the City), and then to the beach!
Suggestive Log and Ms. Shorts-in-the-City
By the time we got to Cadboro Bay Beach, we were RUNNING like mad brownies down the beach to find one of the last areas of sunshine left, and quickly SLAMMED our bodies down on the sand to tan. So typical. Running to lie down.
Beeches on the Beach
40-year-old Virginia and Machinist soak up the sun
Uh oh...I don't think Virginia wanted everyone to know she's 40...bitch is gonna lumber after me now!
Iran Man
Gavin and Bitch
So after what felt like 10 minutes, we RAN back to the car (where Arshia had to madly bare her ass to all of Cadboro Bay to struggle into her jeans), picked up Ji, and we were on our way to Moxie's!
The meal was REALLY GOOD, even with Mentally Challenged Arshia not being able to hear, Julie's much-too-spicy salad, and some rudeness/too much niceness to the waiter. Oh and best:
Gavin: "Arshia, can I have a sip of your coffee?"
Arshia: "Ummm...oooook...it's just that nobody's ever asked me that before...umm..."
LOL WUT.
After that, we started heading home...and I had the INTENTION of dropping Julie off when, all of a sudden...
Julie: "I WANNA GO TO YOUR HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
And that was that.
But stay right there! The night isn't over yet! Continue over to the next post...
You just stay put!
