in which i discuss sleeping beauty syndrome, chocolate, and disney's gender issues
Sleeping Beauty syndrome being what I've decided to diagnose myself with. Not that I actually have the medical problem, which is, apparently, reverse insomnia. It's when a person falls asleep and stays asleep for days. It's an actual medical condition that continues to fascinate me on a purely artistic level. So I think that my constant desire to sleep all the time, all over the place, is not actually a vitamin D deficiency or a result of a skewed sleep schedule, but in actuality a really mild form of this syndrome. Since this is clearly true, I require at least fifty rosebushes to cultivate into an enormous fortress around my home.
This weekend was the rescheduled date for the chocolate festival. I love the chocolate festival. The fill the town hall with chocolate vendors, you buy a bunch of pogs at a dollar a pog, and you go in and exchange these pogs for chocolate. Chocolate of all kinds. I bought a large selection of handmade truffles in chardonnay, lavender, cardamom rose, banana, and blueberry flavors, lavender-flavored salted caramels, and two chocolate bars from Theo: fig fennel, and coconut curry. I also bought a chocolate-covered block of sponge toffee for a friend who adores it- sponge toffee, I mean. It's crumbly, sugary, caramel-like goodness. I'd highly suggest it.
While there, I also visited the chocolate fountain, where I dipped fruit in liquid chocolate, and also a lovely stand of miniature cakes. I had a fruit tart. It was delicious. I adore fruit tarts in all their custardy, fruity goodness. We capped this off by going to a nice Indian restaurant and raiding their luncheon buffet afterwards. Indian food is yet another culinary pleasure in my life. They manage to make everything taste heavenly. Everything and anything. The food itself doesn't necessarily look all that appetizing, but dear god it's like an orgasm in my mouth. (Don't think about that image too hard.)
Meanwhile, this was brought to my attention, and I loathe it utterly. Basically, Disney is changing their 'Rapunzel' movie around so it will attract a wider audience. More specifically, a male audience. They don't want a princess name in a fucking princess movie because it might turn off the boys. Is it not enough that most movies have a male character because marketing has decided that boys are incapable of empathizing with a female protaganist? Pfft. Tell that to the boys who loved Coraline. They say, in fact: "Some people might assume it's a fairy tale for girls when it's not."
I repeat. "Some people might assume it's a fairy tale for girls when it's not."
IT'S. NOT.
Okay, douchebags. FUCK. YOU. You shut us out of every storyline that doesn't involve a fucking princess, and now you're shutting us out of fucking princesses? You misogynistic, ass-kissing, close-minded, patriarchal shitheads. It's not enough that every princess movie boils down the girl to a damsel in distress, but now you don't even want Rapunzel to be the central character in her own. Damn. FILM? Wow, Disney. You've really hit a new low. And yet, whenever girls complain about being excluded from traditionally male storylines, people go out of their way to make up excuses about that behavior. It's not meant for girls. Girls are being too sensitive. Girls should go somewhere else.
You know what? Fine. Then get the hell out of our sparkly princess sandbox if you can't handle the tiaras.
This weekend was the rescheduled date for the chocolate festival. I love the chocolate festival. The fill the town hall with chocolate vendors, you buy a bunch of pogs at a dollar a pog, and you go in and exchange these pogs for chocolate. Chocolate of all kinds. I bought a large selection of handmade truffles in chardonnay, lavender, cardamom rose, banana, and blueberry flavors, lavender-flavored salted caramels, and two chocolate bars from Theo: fig fennel, and coconut curry. I also bought a chocolate-covered block of sponge toffee for a friend who adores it- sponge toffee, I mean. It's crumbly, sugary, caramel-like goodness. I'd highly suggest it.
While there, I also visited the chocolate fountain, where I dipped fruit in liquid chocolate, and also a lovely stand of miniature cakes. I had a fruit tart. It was delicious. I adore fruit tarts in all their custardy, fruity goodness. We capped this off by going to a nice Indian restaurant and raiding their luncheon buffet afterwards. Indian food is yet another culinary pleasure in my life. They manage to make everything taste heavenly. Everything and anything. The food itself doesn't necessarily look all that appetizing, but dear god it's like an orgasm in my mouth. (Don't think about that image too hard.)
Meanwhile, this was brought to my attention, and I loathe it utterly. Basically, Disney is changing their 'Rapunzel' movie around so it will attract a wider audience. More specifically, a male audience. They don't want a princess name in a fucking princess movie because it might turn off the boys. Is it not enough that most movies have a male character because marketing has decided that boys are incapable of empathizing with a female protaganist? Pfft. Tell that to the boys who loved Coraline. They say, in fact: "Some people might assume it's a fairy tale for girls when it's not."
I repeat. "Some people might assume it's a fairy tale for girls when it's not."
IT'S. NOT.
Okay, douchebags. FUCK. YOU. You shut us out of every storyline that doesn't involve a fucking princess, and now you're shutting us out of fucking princesses? You misogynistic, ass-kissing, close-minded, patriarchal shitheads. It's not enough that every princess movie boils down the girl to a damsel in distress, but now you don't even want Rapunzel to be the central character in her own. Damn. FILM? Wow, Disney. You've really hit a new low. And yet, whenever girls complain about being excluded from traditionally male storylines, people go out of their way to make up excuses about that behavior. It's not meant for girls. Girls are being too sensitive. Girls should go somewhere else.
You know what? Fine. Then get the hell out of our sparkly princess sandbox if you can't handle the tiaras.