FIC: Soaked

[ishonn]

The notes that follow are not necessary to receive this drabble and can impose certain interpretation, so feel free to skip them if you’d rather avoid this. The fic can of course stand on its own, and is another take on the rain prompt at sirius_remus100.

I wrote this piece for paulamcg (at least in as much as I could ever write anything for anyone), whose particular

Comments

[paulamcg]

This is so beautiful that I can’t find the words to thank you enough. I’m so happy about this… I’m happy that Sirius notices the shoes, and that Remus does not conventionally say he’s sorry.

They both manage to stay dignified and proud. There’s wonderful contrast between the usual door situation acts - like “Come in” - and Remus’s insistence on the “wrong”, and finally Sirius, indeed, surprises me by stepping out (and I’m glad you don’t show the kiss in the rain). Well, in fact, at the first reading I was a bit confused, because I assumed that Remus stepped in when Sirius had moved aside. Of course, his unchanged words imply that he remains in the rain

Joyously

[ishonn]

You have no idea what pleasure it was to receive your comment, so lovely in its craziness! And relief, actually, because I felt huge responsibility rest with me about this fic

Re: Joyously

[paulamcg]

Now that you mentioned responsibility, it just occurred to me that I could have some responsibility, too - inspiring, even teaching you, as you said. (Sometimes you make me feel I could leave all the writing for you to do and agree to be the muse.) At least I’m happy you feel that I managed to receive this piece sensitively enough. Perhaps the point is that your Remus was saved, because I’m now convinced that he went back to Sirius as soon as after two months (even though, in fact, there is still the possibility that they’d just happened to see each other somewhere like at Order meetings, whereas there’s a longer time since Remus moved out.) Furthermore, I’m relieved Remus agreed to be saved, and I still wonder what exactly made him go back. That’s what makes your drabbles so exciting: you don’t tell us much. And I feel I should not carelessly urge you to continue or to give us such hope which your Remus perhaps doesn’t have

Re: Joyously (1)

[ishonn]

After what I’ve just done within my reply on the “Just a Drizzle” thread, I’m almost afraid to start answering here. You have spoiled me, my sweet friend.

Sometimes you make me feel I could leave all the writing for you to do and agree to be the muse.*snort* But am I not spoiling you, too? No, no, no, you must write, I’m afraid. Firstly, because I’ve just questioned any point of my writing. Secondly, because you’ve got a Remus to take care of. Thirdly, and seriously, because (my) world would be distinctly worse off without your writing, and I’m pretty sure there’s still much for you to say. Conclusion: go and write

Re: Joyously (1)

[paulamcg]

It’s good to return to these playful but undoubtedly sincere reassurances now. These words comfort me even better now after it got more pathetic. But you do spoil me. It’s so easy to just sit and wait for you to save Remus. At the same time I don’t mind the additional responsibilities of a muse, and perhaps I am a teacher at heart, at least as much as a writer. It’s wonderful to know I can help someone else become aware of hope even when I feel that I am hopeless in some sense

Re: Joyously (1)

[ishonn]

It is especially good to see you smile! I really can’t release you from your duty to keep writing, though: I might be able to save Remus from giving up hope, but I cannot possibly get him through your action scenes (have you ever seen me write one? I think that the implications in “Immortal” remain my greatest achievement in this respect), or lead him to the conclusions of his rebellion. Nope, no retirement for you. And don’t even think of one when you’re finished with the novel: I’ll keep pestering you until you take care of the remaining missing pages in Remus’s story. You know I will

Re: Joyously (1)

[paulamcg]

You make me look forward to the time when there are only some remaining missing pages which I can take care of separately. Perhaps (after catching up) you can help me decide what (about the backstory) still needs to be included in the novel and what doesn’t

Re: Joyously (1)

[ishonn]

I’m beyond happy that my idea seems convincing and hope that your being aware of it might help you solve the problem. I don’t see, however, how you could “choose the right diagnosis”. You don’t choose diagnoses, you either find them or not. You can choose the treatment. And, if indeed my concept is true, it just so happened that I came across the diagnosis. I don’t want to say it is everything, though: there might be more elements. As for impressing you, all pleasure is mine, my sweet lady

Re: Joyously (1)

[paulamcg]

Perhaps “choose” was not the right word. But I wanted to say that I construct a diagnosis or interpret one constructed by somebody else on the basis of my current understanding of how I write, or how I don’t succeed in writing, and it is always connected to the treatment I am able to benefit from. It can’t be objective, can it?

I don’t know if it’s arrogant of me to think my theory could work. How could I approach such a perspective from which there is no time in the sense humans experience it - so that everything has already happened while it is also going to - is meant to - happen. I must stay blind and have faith. I do think too much. Perhaps after this I’ll be happy to get back to simply writing without any theories or treatments.

If you don’t feel that your Remus and Sirius are persons, and that you could find out what happened to them by following them from one situation to the next ones (and telling us about it at the same time)… perhaps you’d at least like to say something about what it means to be human in some respect,

Re: Joyously (1)

[ishonn]

The way you put it, you’re right, it can’t be objective, because you obviously influence the treatment.

I like the idea that you’d stay blind and have faith. Now that I’ve reached the temporary end of “Revolt” and see how much there is still to be written, as well as the results of your ‘just’ following Remus, I am blissfully certain that you can go on like that and let the story come to its conclusions naturally.

I can’t remember my reaction when I first received this comment of yours, but now upon rereading it I was startled by your suggestion:
… perhaps you’d at least like to say something about what it means to be human in some respect, or rather try to learn to understand a bit better what it could mean?Do you mean that I could use Remus and Sirius’s story in order to say something like that? But I don’t have anything to say about being human! At least not consciously. I have no idea why I should want to, or how. If you think that I am tackling this issue in my writing, then I am most happy and flattered, but I never intended

Re: Joyously (1)

[paulamcg]

I must once again start by thanking you for what you’ve said about Revolt.

Oh, now I really need all the faith I can borrow from you, too, as I can’t deny there is a lot more to be written. And at the same time you also remind me of the fic promised by Pamela, who does not seem to be reliable at all! There’s certainly no reason to complain about lack of story ideas to think about here while waiting for your return. But I’ll also be thinking about you and hoping that everything is going splendidly.

I … perhaps only show my own understanding of the world

I suppose that’s how we can tackle this issue best, while telling stories or showing moments, without consciously making statements. I don’t know if it’s good to be aware of an agenda like “developing understanding of what it means to be human”. But towards the end of last year, I think, I read on minisinoo’s journal (she’s the professional and multi-fandom novelist who could not follow what I Don’t Dream was about) that fiction consists of style and heart, and the heart of the story stands

Re: Joyously (2)

[ishonn]

I think that Remus needed to settle some things before he could make another step, and literally step inside. And maybe, just maybe he knew they needed to settle this in the rain, just as they had fallen out

Re: Joyously (2)

[paulamcg]

Remus’s choice not to step in looks quite natural in this situation, when he demands a proper response to his statement. I also get the lovely impression that he is cold and badly needs to get in, and he stubbornly refuses to admit it. That’s why the idea of the need to settle the dispute in the rain can remain only for us to be aware of. On the other hand, I wanted to see that Remus dreamed of this. Now I’m sure we are getting involved in these characters’ reality and it would not be the same without us, and I must question my strict rules

Re: Joyously (2)

[ishonn]

I, too, am convinced that Remus must be cold and would love to get in, have a hot shower and a mug of chocolate. (I can’t resist imagining it now: Remus, sitting in the kitchen and still drying his hair with a towel, and Sirius bustling about making chocolate. If I weren’t sure that this obvious continuation would spoil the reception of “Soaked”, I’d be tempted to write it. It must be your bad influence …) And Sirius must be aware of this, which makes Remus’s insistence even more persuasive. Well, I hope that questioning your rules here wasn’t very painful-I broke them to write this drabble and am most satisfied with the results

Re: Joyously (2)

[paulamcg]

Could you write the lovely towel scene in order to see what it would reveal to you, and just not share it? Am I now ready to break my rule that fiction (art) must be communication? Or you could share it (first) only with me

Re: Joyously (2)

[ishonn]

I think I will write the towel scene. I even hope to do it tonight, after I have replied to everything. There’s one more scene I want to write, actually, and it also remains in connection to the rainy fight. As for sharing, I suppose it will depend on whether some purpose reveals itself in the process or not. And if I do write it and it doesn’t turn out dreadful, I promise to share the fic with you. After all, it’s your order, isn’t it? (Thus I am beginning to write to order. What’s happening to us, to our rules?! You temptress!)

Oh, for pity’s sake, you almost killed me with this image: PaulaMcG PamelaO’P - the Porn Queen of Fandom, plus a smutty icon, necessarily with a collar. Brilliant! When do you start writing?

And seriously, would you really consider writing something more explicit? Because I know I would, if I only saw a purpose. Perhaps I will, as Winter (one of the lalallama_girls) convinced me to try and write this horrible fic I’d told you about, with Remus agreeing to sleep with Sirius against his own will. (Winter’s also the one who