He’s left Myungsoo playing on his own. He was kicking his ass anyway, and he didn’t tag along with him for his gamer pride to be tested like that.
“Bored already?” Woohyun asks without looking up, a knife mercilessly chopping some dark chocolate.
“No, just trying to preserve what little dignity I have left”
A low chuckle bubbles from the man’s chest, a warm sound, Sunggyu thinks “There’s no such thing as dignity in games”
He huffs a little laugh “What are you doing?”
“Chocolate cheesecake”
He blinks up from the knife “That a thing?”
“That a thing?” the other laughs “Yes, that’s a real recipe”
Sunggyu clicks his tongue annoyed at the mockery, but leaves it at that, he’s got more important things to think of, like “But you mix cheese with chocolate?”
“Exactly”
“Does that really taste good?” he can’t help the grimace.
“It does, but you’ll never know until you try it”
“It is for now?” he asks.
“No, I have a dinner tonight and I’m in charge of the dessert”
“Oh”
Woohyun laughs again, and finally looks up from his work “I’ll make you some next time, alright?”
Forget it, he thinks “Alright” he nods, the smile breaks free before he can stop it.
***
One more boring morning to his record. One more day of low expectative for fun but a bit for a good way to kill some time. Maybe, if the guys were doing something after class… Or during class, doesn’t matter.
Oh, tomorrow, he remembers suddenly, while listlessly highlighting some notes for History. A little grin pulls at the corner of his mouth. He almost wishes that bizarre cake is awful so he can give Woohyun a bad time… But no, that’d be too shitty, the guy’s gonna bake that for him, how crazy is that? Maybe he can take some back home, stash it in the fridge and make it last for as long as he can. To survive the winter.
He chuckles on his own, ignoring the curious look Myungsoo gives him from his side. His friend doesn’t know, because he didn’t tell him. And that’s kind of strange, he’s going to Woohyun’s solely to eat the silly cheesecake, and doesn’t want to tell Myungsoo because… Well because. He doesn’t want to appear like a starved beggar, visiting a nearly stranger’s home to eat. But he really wants to try that cake, like, seriously. He watched the man through the whole baking process and, honestly, it tempted him so bad he almost stole the spatula to lick it clean. He actually did, but Woohyun made him drop it before he could achieve to poke his tongue out.
Thinking back on it, he felt a bit embarrassed about his attitude. He spent the whole time orbiting around the man, asking what he was doing, what he was using, how he did this or that, and almost whining when he was denied the goddamned spatula. But Woohyun had never once complained about it, so he thought it was ok.
“What are you even doing” Myungsoo’s voice broke his train of thought.
“What?”
The other nodded to his notes, and yeah, there was now a big mass of bright yellow all over the page “Highlighting?”
“The whole page?”
“It’s important”
Myungsoo throws him an amused look and shakes his head “It’s your notes”
He shrugs and peeks to his friend’s own notes, but then something warm brushes his neck and shivers break all over his arms and back.
“Hey” he hears, and the nerves are back in a second.
He looks up to meet lazy eyes and purple strands of hair between stark black “Hey”
“Listen, we’re hitting the club this Saturday” the boy says, his fingers still softly touching the back of his neck.
“Oh…” he nods, waiting for the other to finish.
He gets raised eyebrows “You comin’”
“What?”
“You comin’” a grin breaks into the other’s face.
“Uh, I don’t know…”
“Ah, bullshit, man, you are coming with me” the fingers turn into a full hand that slides to his shoulder.
“Alright, alright, I’ll tell you later” he shrugs his shoulder to move the hand away from his skin.
The guy snickers and pats his shoulder. Sunggyu expects to be left alone, but in the blink of an eye, the hand goes up to his jaw, back to his neck again and pinches him quickly before he can swat it away. Purple boy is walking away when he realizes his face is too warm to be normal.
“What was that just now?” his friend asks slowly.
Sunggyu turns to him and finds him looking at the place where the other guy just disappeared through.
“What? Nothing” he mutters.
Myungsoo shifts his eyes to him, questioning and slightly narrowed “Nothing” he echoes blankly.
“Yeah, nothing, they just like clubbing a bit too much”
“Alright” again the flat tone, but the matter is dropped.
Sunggyu huffs annoyed. Stupid challenges and his stupid pride took him there. And the stupid confusing things. Things and people. These stupid mixtures that left him gawking and put off, yet yearning to try a bit more.
Like that stupid chocolate cheesecake… Right, tomorrow, he smiles again.
---
He’s surprised to find the door unlocked, then panics for a second, until he hears the voice “Sunggyu?” he remains in his place, pushes the door open, watches the man peek from the kitchen door “Hey”
“Hi… What are you doing here?”
“Electricity got cut at the office for some repairing”
“Oh…”
“I’ll be working here, so…”
So what? Don’t bother me? Go somewhere else? “I’m leaving soon anyway” he says bitterly, even though he wasn’t really planning to.
“Where?”
Not your business “Just out”
He walks to his room, drops his things and changes his uniform. When he walks back into the living room his father is already plugged into work, a heavy scowl sitting on his brow and three different folders on the table beside his laptop. He walks into the kitchen, not really hungry, just to do something, takes a glass, fills is with water, has a sip or two and then leans on the counter.
What is he going to do now? Lock himself in the room? Sit in the kitchen nursing a glass of water? Stay in the living room silently watching him work? Actually go out with nothing to do? Not like he usually has that many options more, but at least he doesn’t feel like he’s intruding. And why is he even feeling that? It’s his home too, right? But no, the man has to work here, so there’s that… It feels awkward, and that’s not right. Hates to feel that way when he shouldn’t.
He sighs in annoyance and pulls his phone out, thinks of Myungsoo, ‘What u doin now?’, he writes, sends, then remembers it’s Myungsoo and his words should have been complete. Oh well…
Photography, then to watch my little brother’s performance with his class. Why?
Well, fuck. ‘Never mind’. Sulky answer, he knows, but he’s in a sulky mood right now. And he’s pretty damn sure Myungsoo knows why he’d send a message like that; it was self-explanatory actually, but whatever.
Guess it’s out and around until something comes up, he resigns himself and walks to the door. A hand in on the handle when his father asks “Don’t you have any homework to do, Sunggyu?”
And then the mood goes further down, because that’s what worries you, right? He glances back, sees his father watching him with a scowl on his grim face. He wants to walk out, slam the door and be gone, but then he also sees the dark shadows under the man’s eyes, and the lines of worry in his face… And Woohyun said that thing, people mixing signals and middle ground and whatnot. He could try.
But he’s still bitter, so instead what come out is “I’ll do it later”
The man sighs, but says nothing about it, seems reluctant and it angers Sunggyu that he can’t even scold him properly. What is wrong with them?
“I have a business trip this week” his father says, his eyes going back to the laptop, avoiding Sunggyu’s.
“When?” doesn’t know why he even asks, it’s not that much of a difference anyway.
“I leave tomorrow morning” And couldn’t you fucking tell me sooner? He wants to ask, but, again, what difference would it make? “I’ll be back Sunday, around seven in the afternoon probably”
He exhales loudly, anger dulling and indifference settling in “Ok, bye” he throws curtly, and he leaves without waiting for a response.
---
Luck and life itself might be playing around with him, because he was supposed to just walk aimlessly until something occurred to him, but there he was now, sitting on that big metal container in a narrow alley, side to side with none other than purple boy and his nasty cigs. How in hell? Who cares now? He’s killing time, cooling off, and in a good way, if he has to say. Until now, no strange looks, no confusing touches, not weird phrasing, just the two of them chatting away and sharing a bit of toxic smoke. Yes, that’s still a thing.
Purple boy is not half bad, he’s actually a cool guy, funny in his own way, relaxed, confident, he knows his ways and that makes Sunggyu feel oddly confident too… As long as they’re like this. He feels it’s ok to just let things roll away and put his feet in dubious ground, like drinking, smoking and prodding into strange bonding ways, all feels like a mellow challenge he can take on. So he does, because it’s alright.
And then the guy goes and drops his hand on Sunggyu’s leg. It would be fine, he’s not that jumpy, but it’s the arm that just falls, and the hand slides to the inner side of his thigh and that’s just a bit too much for his mind to wrap around. He bends his knee up towards his chest, just a movement, trying to shake that hand off. Doesn’t work, instead, the arm coils around his leg and the hand actually holds him, fingers slipping in the tight space behind his knee. He starts feeling the uneasiness taking hold of his limbs again, but not as badly as the time before. There’s no audience to watch his lame show of jittery doubts, just him trying to deal with this guy, with the challenge that this guy is for him.
The hand starts kneading, and Sunggyu can’t help the soft slap “What are you doing?”
“Mh?” lazy answer, an exhale of smoke, unbothered eyes blinking his way.
“Seriously”
“You hate it?”
“Huh?” wasn’t expecting that question. Hate it? Not the way he’d say it, more like it made him nervous “Uh…”
“Don’t like it?”
It’s not that he doesn’t like it. It’s kind of nice, it’s a way of… bonding? Affection? Maybe that’s a bit too much, but it’s something like that. Just that’s it’s a bit rushed, going from a nod and a ‘hey dude’ to weird hugs and knee massaging or whatever it was purple boy was doing. He actually liked it, it made him feel noticed in a different way, something in being close with this guy when he’d normally wouldn’t… Wouldn’t dare, but he was making it easier for him.
“Alright then” he hears, near. He knows the other’s close, and doubts about turning. Should he? He feels purple boy watching his profile, as if waiting for something “Something wrong?” his voice again, a touch of edge on it, a little squeeze of fingers under his knee. He’s not going to turn around, mixed sings and all that crap? Yeah “Hey…”
“-It’s alright! Just drop by tonight, I’ll be home” a voice comes loudly from the street, a voice he recognizes with surprising ease “Yeah, don’t worry!” it sounds closer.
His eyes fly to the cigarette in his hand, the lonely can of beer beside him, the hand on his leg. The voice is just behind the corner now, and Sunggyu turns around, not thinking of the face inches away from his, but of the voice of the man walking behind. He keeps his eyes on purple boy’s neck, avoiding eye contact, his fingers shake a bit and his heart goes erratic, but he can’t be seen like that, not by Woohyun.
The man walks away, and he relaxes a little, but then he looks up and warmth floods his face with embarrassing speed. He sniffs and clears his throat, turning back to the front as if nothing happened. It suddenly irks him, the situation, one thing pushing him onto another. Having to hide from the man, why? What should he care to be seen? What if he drinks a bit and smokes a bit and… And enjoys the… the close company of this guy? There’s nothing wrong with that. Well, there might be some issues with the drinking and smoking, him being underage, but what if he likes to be close and touchy with his buddy? What’s… wrong with that? He can do it, he’s free to do it, it shouldn’t bother him if someone saw him, it doesn’t bother him, he’s taking a challenge here, he wants to try-
A shuddering breath leaves him, halting abruptly his train of thoughts. Doesn’t matter anyway. Woohyun didn’t see him, and that’s good. He doesn’t care what people think, mostly, except with some people. Woohyun seems to think he’s decent company, he’s good to him, he’s nice and… Caring, somehow, strangely, confusingly caring. He doesn’t want to screw that up with a scene like this, a scene that suddenly feels stupid, pretentious, unnecessary. No, that’s just him comparing himself to a grown, mature man. Of course he’ll feel stupid. But it’s fine with him, he can accept that, because Woohyun seems to be a good guy. And back again to the point of not wanting to show him his most questionable side, it’s too fragile a contact to strain it…
The hand on his legs presses tighter than ever, a shift brings more warmth to his side, a low chuckle rumbles beside him. It freaks him out a little, the whole thing, both sides. His fingers still shake and his heart is not calm yet, the flush keeps touching his face. Too much of a challenge, certainly too much, but he doesn’t want to back down.
“So… what was that?”
“There was-“ he stops and clears his throat again, his voice almost fails him “There was this guy I know, didn’t want to get in trouble if he saw me… you know”
Another chuckle, and a nudge from shoulder to shoulder “Sure kitten”
Shivers run down his back, that’s another step too wide, and he almost balks out. Almost.
***
“Hey, careful” a hand pops out in front of him, holding his wrist with gentle firmness. He startles a bit, but the grip prevents him from any damage “Hold that from the other side, you’re cutting too close to your fingers”
“Hmm…” he nods lightly and moves his hand away from the blade.
“You sure you don’t want to go wait-?”
“No, I want to help” he replies, for what has to be the third time.
“Well then, try to come back down to earth a bit, I don’t want to have to send you back home missing a finger, alright?” the man chides softly.
He forces himself to focus on the task at hand and let go of his musings. Woohyun’s knives are pretty damn sharp and he would like to avoid missing parts of his hands. He insisted on helping the man in the kitchen, feeling awkward and uncomfortable just sitting there watching him work for him. Because that’s pretty much what was happening. He came after school, no Myungsoo as excuse, with the sole purpose of being treated to food. He feels a bit embarrassed, but somehow still willing to put himself in this awkward situation. Something felt kind of worth it.
Again he spends the time orbiting around the man, asking, trying to help, trying to steal some bits, almost burning himself with the pot and the boiling water, then the oven. Woohyun finally shoos him to the couch, but the smile in his face takes any uneasiness out of Sunggyu’s system before he drops in front of the TV and picks up the control to resume a paused game.
It takes no time at all, except for the long while spent looking sadly through the window of the oven. But then it goes to the fridge, and Sunggyu lets out a long, pitiful groan of complaint before he can help it. Woohyun laughs at him, and Sunggyu is too mellow at the moment to snap at anything. So he keeps playing, the other joins, and nearly two hours fly by. He’s not concerned that it’s getting late, doesn’t make any difference, and says so when Woohyun asks. He doesn’t say he’ll be alone anyway, and that he hates being alone at home, but the man doesn’t need to know that. There’s a weird expression on Woohyun’s face but he shrugs it off, even when he wonders if he was coming off as too uncaring, too cold. He just doesn’t want to share that much.
The thing is actually quite good, and Sunggyu wipes the plate clean, nearly licking it, but behaving for the sake of appearances… Because he admits that, for some reason, he kind of cares about Woohyun’s opinion of him.
They spend some more time, sitting at the table, empty mugs and clean plates. There’s no hurry to leave in Sunggyu’s feet, no need to escape to someplace of his own, no urge to leave the home of a man he barely knows and should (but really doesn’t) make him feel awkward and uncomfortable. He’s just fine as it is. And he doesn’t fight it. Must be the man’s age, he’s not that older than him, or maybe the fact that he’s Myungsoo’s cousin, some extended bond of the sorts? Is it because he helped him with his hangover? No, that should probably add to the factors to make things awkward. What then?
“Take the rest” Woohyun says when Sunggyu finally admits he should be going.
“What?”
“The rest of it, take it home”
“It…? Oh! Oh, no, forget it, it’s almost the whole thing-”
“Didn’t you like it?”
“W-No! I mean, yeah!”
Woohyun chuckles a little and goes to the kitchen. Sunggyu is now feeling a bit uncomfortable, he never liked receiving favors or gifts out of the blue, never really knew how to react and usually did it badly. But, then again, he has been getting help from this man before and… He’s not really sure if he reacted well enough.
“It’s ok, really” he calls form the door “It’s too much, you should-“
“Just take it, you did it after all, it’s yours”
“I did not!” he blurts, his voice sounding almost offended. He scoffs at himself, really what’s with him? “I mean-“
A big Tupperware is pressed into his arms, and Woohyun smiles at him as if nothing “You think I can’t make another? You take this home, and show your dad, what best that food waiting home to make him feel at home?”
And then things go sour again. It was too good to last, apparently. Sunggyu feels his face closing up, brows getting heavy and mouth tight. He takes the container firmly and gives a little nod, trying not to unleash the biting retorts that swarm his mouth. Or maybe he should… He should make it clear to this guy that he’s got nothing to say about his father or his home. He knows nothing of it and should say nothing of it. It’s none of his business, is it? No it’s- “It’s not your business!” comes out suddenly, packed with mild anger in a tense voice. Screw it, already halfway in. He looks up and, scowl deep and lungs full, but then stalls again.
It’s not surprise what he finds, it’s not shock, not anger, not offense. He’s actually not sure what he sees, it’s again that weird expression on Woohyun’s face, between stern and understanding, he guesses. Is he being pitied? Maybe, but if it is, he can’t find it in him to be angered by it.
A hand pats his arm softly, and Woohyun sighs “Sorry buddy, I know” he says, and Sunggyu doesn’t have the time to master his face before his eyes go a little wide “Just take it home, alright?”
He’s the one surprised now, but manages a curt nod in reply. He picks up his things and walks out, keeping quiet as they go to the front door of the building. He steps out, and thinks of just walking away, but he turns around before he can seriously consider it. Woohyun is smiling at him, not as stupidly, but with that same strange expression from before “Take care, ok?” he says.
Sunggyu nods again, drops his eyes to the ground, and walks away.
There’s this nagging feeling that bothers him for the rest of the day, You freaking idiot, you didn’t thank him!, but then he just shrugs it off, because Next time.
***
Way to start his Saturday, just peachy. Going out to escape the silence of his home only to bump into his friend. Good coincidence you’d think, well not so much this time. He wants to groan and kick, and maybe throw some things, because he’s seriously fed up. He tries picking up his pace, but of course the other just follows without a care.
“I mean it!” Myungsoo insists.
“I know, and I told you that you need to lay off!”
“I can’t!”
“Why the fuck not?!”
“Stop-“ a deep intake of air, clenched teeth “Stop yelling at me Sunggyu”
“You are yelling too”
“Am not”
“What the fuck ever, man. Back off”
“You’re an asshole, you know that?”
He takes all the control he can not to lash out at his friend “Yeah, seems like I am, you keep saying it” he manages to reply through his clenched jaw.
“Oh, yeah?”
“What the fuck do you want?”
“You’re not!”
“What?”
“You are not an asshole! You’re just acting like one!”
“Same fucking thing, is it?”
“No, it’s not-“
“Enough, alright?”
“No, it’s not enough! What’s wrong with you?”
“Why don’t you tell me? You seem to know, don’t you?”
“Yeah, I know, and you know that I do, you just don’t want to admit it”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about-“
“You do. You’re acting up, you know that. You’ve been being a little shit for a while now-“
“Oh, yeah, thanks again, man”
“Don’t give me that! You know I get it, alright? I get it! But you’re starting to go too far-”
“And how the heck do you know what too far is, huh?”
“I kn-“
“You don’t know! How can you even-?”
“This is too far!” Myungsoo’s quick hand takes the cigarette from his fingers and throws it to the ground.
His spine tenses, and his body turns to his friend, one step too close into his personal space. Myungsoo actually flinches back, his eyes widening slightly before he recovers his angry scowl. But it sends a shock of guilt that makes Sunggyu back up and hurry his pace even more.
“What’s the matter with you? Why are you so freaking bothersome all of a sudden? Why are you breathing in my neck? Why can’t you just let me be for once?”
“For once? I’m trying to take care of you-“
“You don’t fucking have to!” he finally snaps and falls back to yelling “I can take care of my stupid self, alright? You’re not my fucking dad to be taking care of me! Back the fuck off!”
He stomps away in shaky anger, and for once Myungsoo doesn’t follow.
---
He’s angry. Still. Angry enough to not care about being a sour little fuck, about drinking a bit too quickly for his own tolerance. Angry enough to not care at all about sulking in a night club with a tall glass in his hand, nearly ignoring the two guys beside him. Crappy mood, crappy weather, crappy night. How fitting.
But deep down, he didn’t want to come either, he just wanted to stay at home and sleep the stormy night away. He is angry but also regretful; he keeps messing things up with his friend… With pretty much everything anyway. Seems like he can’t find that silly middle ground Woohyun told him about. He tried, but… It seems easy enough while talking with the man. He’s just at ease, relaxed, and his head seems to work more reasonably, but then when he’s out and in a tricky situation, things go back to the black and white and he snaps like there’s no tomorrow. A little shit, Myungsoo called him? Sometimes he can’t argue that. A shitty brat, he’s being. But that’s all. Nothing wrong with acting up a little, he’s a teenager after all, isn’t this what he’s supposed to be doing? He’s not taking it too far, is he? What about these other guys? They don’t seem too bothered, and he doesn’t feel bad for going along with them… Well, most of the time, that is. He still feels a bit stupid for hiding like a little mouse when Woohyun walked past them in the alley, but he still also feels stupid every time he gets cranky or silly in the man’s presence. It’s like he just doesn’t want him to think less of him for being… Well, a shitty brat.
He sighs in frustration, why is he even thinking about that when he’s out a Saturday night? Because he’d rather be playing videogames on the floor, smelling warm food from the kitchen and being shown how to make a stupid chocolate cheesecake on a rainy late night instead of getting his brain thumped with loud bass and his blood pumped with alcohol while being bored out of his mind leaning against a wet bar without even knowing if it’s still raining outside? Probably. But the first option wasn’t available to begin with, so what difference does it make?
Just like the previous time, they went straight to the bar, knocking back a few drinks to get in the mood, as they said, and then some more because why not? The music is as invasive as ever, the people dark and confusing, entertaining only so far, a bit intimidating in some cases. Especially when some suggestively dressed ladies eye them like dolls in auction. He should probably feel flattered, maybe even proud or more confident, but it wasn’t working that way. He feels self-conscious, out of place, uncomfortable. If any of those women were to approach him, what is he supposed to do? He knows their companions were more than ok with it, but he still has many reservations, at least for as long as he is aware of his actions.
“Hey!” an elbow to his ribs “Looks like that babe over there has her eyes on you”
“Nah” he shrugs, trying not to be obvious as he follows the other’s sight.
Indeed, he is being ogled without an ounce of discretion. Even worse, the moment he sets his eyes on her, she starts walking over, and he panics.
“Oh” the blonde guy beside him laughs “Your lucky night, dude!”
“What? No-“
“Come on! Gonna tell me you don’t like her? She’s hot!”
“I-I know, but-“
“Dude, grow a pair! It’s time you start biting a bit” the second one says, picking his glass from the bar and walking off as if nothing. The blonde follows swiftly.
Sunggyu is really close to reach out and ask them not to leave him, but… Not exactly the best way of action. So he takes a deep breath and chugs down a few fat gulps of his drink. Burns a bit his throat and stomach, shots right to his head, but it’s distraction enough. He tries his best at keeping his face still, not grimacing at the burnt and taste of the shit he’s drinking, he has to keep his act after all. He’s absolutely not an underage sneaking in. Not at all. He wonders if his face doesn’t betray him a bit, but seems like not, if the looks the lady now perched beside him is giving him are any indication. Or maybe it’s actually noticeable and she doesn’t care? Wait, what if she knows he’s underage and is playing with him? What if she takes him to the bouncers? What if-?
“Hey” a high pitched voice greets him “Left alone?”
He blinks his thoughts away and looks at her. Pretty, alright. His eyes run downwards and quickly back up. Yeah, he should probably be very happy right now, but he still can’t fight off the anxiousness. He has to keep his act, though, so he tries a shrug “I guess”
“Well, I’m alone too” she inches closer, and Sunggyu fights back a scoff, because yeah, he just saw her dismissing her four friends, but who is he to judge, right? “Want me to keep you some company?”
And what is he supposed to answer to that? Probably a sure, or by any means, or I’d be flattered… But he honestly doesn’t want to. He looks at her again, her eyes and big and keen on him, dark make up on her long, curvy lashes, soft looking cheeks and plush, glistening lips. Alright, she is freaking pretty, and her dress is sexy but not as revealing as some other he’s seen. Her pale pink nails are softly pressing at his arm now, and the little smile turns into a cute pout at his lack of response. He’s saved of her true annoyance because he keeps looking at her, so she must think he’s just too busy admiring her to respond. It’s actually quite true, just that he doesn’t want to answer anyway.
“If you want to…” he finally says, not sure is the right thing to say, but not able to lie either.
She giggles, though, and starts making little chat. He’s certainly glad, because talking, that he can do. There are several winks and hints in the fleeting minutes that crawl past, but he just tries to play it coy for as long as he can. It’s obvious that she knows he’s not as old as he should be, and it seems to be of her liking, so he plays the card of the shy guy. And she definitely likes that too, if her flirty cooing is any indication. Makes him feel like a child, really annoying, but he doesn’t know what else he can do. She wastes no time in passing her drink for him to try it. He thinks he should be a bit worried for a second, but… Why really? He’s getting free alcohol and playing his part of a bashful boy unsure of how to act and trying to stay in her attention. Which is half true.
Problem is, he had been drinking before she walked up to him, and now he keeps drinking some seriously strong stuff. He’s pretty stupid already, his laugh as easy as breathing and his movements a bit on the unstable side.
She’s instantly draped on his arm, her soft hand tapping his nose a few times before tilting his head to the side so he’s facing her. So far so good, he’s found some security in their short talk, because she doesn’t seem to be wanting to jump his bones just yet, and that’s good with him. As long as they keep just talking and drinking and playing with the silly flirting, he’s fine with it.
But then she’s way too close, and her hand slide down to his chest and then some more, and his guts tense along with his back. That’s just too much.
“Come on, come dance with me” she all but breathes against his mouth.
And that’s a no. Uncomfortable enough to just stand by her, but to go dance? Meaning, hands-on approach? Oh no. Leaving the security of the bar behind him? And he can see the couple dancing that’s going on out there. Absolutely not doing it. But how can he turn her down now? That being, without downright dismissing her. He should have walked away sooner, like, walking away before she even made it to his side. How is he supposed to do it now?
“I… Uh…” he looks around, borderline desperate, for a way out. But nothing comes to mind. Maybe he could claim to go to the bathroom and… disappear?
“Why so shy, silly boy?” she giggles again “It’s ok, I’ll show you how”
That sounds way worse, and he doesn’t find any other way to get out of her hands. What’s the worst that could happen? A slap? The drink in her hand all over his face? Well, here goes nothing-
“Hey, doll” a new voice comes from his other side, a masculine voice.
He panics again, thinking he’s so very screwed if that’s her boyfriend. But maybe it’s just another dude trying to win her? Seeing that this stupid brat is not making his move, that’d make sense, right? It could be his chance-
“What-?” he gasps when a hand finds its way around his waist, a body pressing to his side.
“I was looking for you” the voice says, and then he recognizes it, looks to the side, and yes there he is, lazy eyes set on his and a crooked smirk on his mouth.
“Wh-…” he can’t even ask, just sighs and tries to turn his face away.
“Excuse me?” the lady asks from the other side.
Just perfect. But then, yeah, just perfect!
He huffs and pries the hands off him.
“Wait…” the woman says, big eyes confused, and then throwing a blaming look at the other guy still perched on the bar.
“Come on, doll, don’t run away” purple boy says, his grin so obvious it’s almost funny.
But Sunggyu plays his part, throws a doubtful look to the woman, then makes an apologetic face, and walks away.
He’s giggling like an idiot as he walks into a more or less empty nook. He made his way to the other side of the place, finding a little space across the dancing floor where the lights are as low as they go and people is scarce. Or maybe not so scarce, if the few figures draped around each other are any hint. Wrong place to be, indeed, and he is about to run away when yet again a pair of arms lock around his waist.
“There you are” the guy says, and Sunggyu is already feeling uncomfortable “No need to run away anymore”
“Yeah, no… I…” he actually wants to. He wants to go home already, there’s no fun in feeling dizzy and stupid, and getting a headache and he knows he’ll keep drinking because he’s fucking bored and then he’ll get another hangover and he doesn’t want that “I just wanna go home” he mumbles without thinking.
“What?” the other laughs “No way! There’s still a lot to do”
“No ther’s not” he slurs a bit, and gets annoyed “Fucking sucks! I wanna… I’m hungry!” he is, actually, and he thinks if there’s any cheesecake left at home. He ate like a starving dog the day before, so he suspect there’s none left. Can’t quite remember-
“What? Hungry? Really?”
“Yeah, fuckin’ ungry! I wanna go play some shit an’ j’st eat… And sleep”
“Oh, come on! That’s so boring”
“No’s not” the slurring is getting bothersome and he clicks his tongue “This’ boring”
“Is it?”
“Yeah” it is, and he wonders what time it is. Would Myungsoo be up? But no, he’s angry at him, right. Well then… Woohyun?
“We can fix that” he suddenly smells alcohol and cigarette, and realizes how close the other is.
“What’r you doin’?” he pushes against the other’s chest.
“Enteratainin’ you” the guy pushes back.
“Not entertain’n”
“It can be-“
“’S not, back off”
“Really?”
He steps back, or tries to when the back of his shoes hit the wall. Perfect. He keeps as much of his cool as he can, trying not to look at the other guy, not to pay attention to the arms around him, or the constant push against him. He doesn’t want this, why would he? One thing is to fool around and get close as friends, but this? This is a tad bit too much. His pulse runs like mad and he wants nothing but to leave, but then the pushing gets harsher and his arms bend under the pressure. He feels nearly asphyxiated in the restricting hold, and damn his hands are shaking now, he feels his face burning and his heartbeat in his ears. Seriously, is this guy for real? Does he really want… Him? Like this? He’s got to be playing around, he’s just being an idiot, just joking with him… Right?
“Not funny” he grunts “Let go”
“Doesn’t have to be funny” the other says in his face, and then leans in.
He sees him coming, but does nothing. He just doesn’t get it, doesn’t understand until he feels the warmth against his mouth, the breath against his face, the arms pressing tighter. And for a moment he blanks out. His brain goes haywire with feelings, his skin tingles all over and his heart bumps almost deafeningly in his head. His body relaxes in a strange way, melts to the knees for a second of sensorial confusion. His eyelids want to drop, his fingers want to curl, but then the wall gets harder against his back and it all comes crashing down on him like a ton of bricks about to bury him. He takes a sharp breath and feels his muscles tensing all over, then his arms get painfully charged and push blindly against the other, sending him stumbling back.
He doesn’t even have the control to say anything, just stares wide eyed as the guy shifts and starts walking back annoyed “The fuck are you doing?”
“The fuck are you doing?!” he finally talks.
“What? You totally wanted that”
“No I- Where-? I don’t want that!”
“Yeah right” the other scoffs, sure steps trying to corner him once more “Don’t lie”
“Stay the fuck away!”
“You want me to do this”
“I told you-!” he stumbles back at the other’s approaching, the wall again behind him makes him angrier “Stop it!”
“Why?”
“Because I’m freaking telling you to!”
“I don’t believe you”
“What?!”
“Do something about it then”
Sunggyu’s still very much buzzed, so it’s a blur when purple boy nearly lungs at him. All he knows is that he’s suddenly trapped again, the air knocked out of him, and all he manages to do is turn his head to the side and get a wet smooch on his cheek. He’d laugh, if he weren’t so on edge and pissed off. He struggles to break free, it’s obvious that the other guy is more in control of his body’s movements than him, alcohol tolerance and all that crap, but fuck him if he’s going to let himself be manhandled like this. He doubles his efforts, now a matter of pride more than anything, and manages to put them both in a lock. He risks a look, finds severely annoyed eyes drilling into his skull, flaring nostrils and a tensed jaw, and decides he needs to get the hell out of there as soon as possible. But his strength is failing and the guy is getting closer again. Hands on wrists start shaking, and he makes a last attempt to step out, only to have his right arm buckle and two different fists come crashing against his face. He’s blind for a second, even less than that, pain explodes somewhere in his face and he pulls and jerks in seething anger. He knows he shakes the guy off and maybe lands a halfhearted hit of his own. Doesn’t really care, just walks away as fast as he can.
He’s not thinking clearly anymore, all hurt pride and face, embarrassment and confusion and anger at so many things and people he just doesn’t get it. He doesn’t realize he forgets his jacket when he walks out, barely registers the cold water that falls on him, doesn’t care for the people he pushes past. He just wants out. Away. Home.
---
part four