*sigh*
Hmmmm…. So tonight was AMAZING, we had GAME NIGHT…I spent a butt load of $$$ I don’t have but as soon as the party started it kinda became worth it… Literally everyone in the room was someone that I loved … It was soo much fun…food, drinking games, jungle juice, catch phrase, silly string… And soo much laughter… There is nothing like a room full of laughter… There were soo many good moments I cant even describe to you….: Seeing a friend smile the whole night after a really long time of being sad, dancing and craziness, bringing your different friends together and seeing them get along, exchanging stories and looks with your best friends across the room… Im going to miss all of this… college, parties, drinking games… cleaning up after everyone leaves and talking with ky…
It’s weird to have this amazing time and contrast it with the way things have happened with chris and matt and all the other out of blue tragedies… I’ve learned over thee years I can’t change life I just have to have faith and hope and hold on to the goodness in my life… Life throws us unexpected turns and habit’s own timeline. …And there is soo much goodness especially in nights like tonight…everyone who was there …my friends who make me laugh … Travis who always allows me to feel his love, presence, and support through letting me feel close and millions of hugs..having that physical touch can be soo caring and healing sometimes… and Kylan… I don’t even know…just our talks…sitting up and talking about everything and anything…and knowing the years that have gone behind our connection…I don’t know what I would have ever done with out him in my life it makes me feel soo much better the hopefull god will hear my prayers and his and maybe that will help… I just don’t want to loose anyone else, I don’t want anyone feel that fear if loss…I just want peace…