Sooo....
Things have been kinda off as of late I'm comming off of a week of pure happiness and smiles...that along with other stuff has resulted in my current state of ... unsettled saddness....so yah......
I dont know, I'm working to get back the happy... its just sometimes life throws you a curve ball and it hits you in the stomache and its hard to recover... but I want to ...soo...
There are soo many things that are built over time, they are things that take years of patience and care to develop: Love, Confidence...Trust .... And for things that take so long to create they can be lost in a moment...all it takes is a split moment to alter and harm what has been built over time... and mending that is hard... because as much as you want to mend that hurt and brokeness you cant just forget that moment where what was built up was forgotten....
In the past year I have lost/hurt in these three areas of my life...Love, Confidence, and Trust .... and I have recovered from two of them and I hope the same goes for the last... I dont know it just throws you when something hurts one of those three things and it hurts soo much...you're not mad or angry you're just hurt and lost because you dont understand why...I dont know...just some thoughts I had to get out...
I want to be remembered as the girl that always smiles even when her heart is broken and the one that could always brighten your day even when she couldn’t brighten her own....Being happy doesn’t mean everything is perfect, it means you’ve learned to look past the imperfections... I'm going to find my smile..I just need some healing right now and closure....but it'll be ok....