Push and Pull: Sirius and Lily (Closed RP)

[toujours_sirius]

((Takes place in the wee hours of the night just after this. Now containing R-rated material.))

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[lilypotter60]

((Rethreaded...))

"I'm not hungry," she shrugged, fingers playing around the rim of her mug. And she wasn't. Too many things were churning through her brain; the thought of eating made her stomach, already clenched up in so many knots, flip unpleasantly.

Taking a sip of tea, Lily leaned her head back, closing her eyes. Merlin, she was just so tired. And actually, most of it had nothing to do with Sirius. Cox's statements to her during her Office Hours - the fact that she was treating her job in the Wing like a game, the inference that she wasn't good enough at what she did - had shaken her, but they had also made her push herself harder. Barely a spare moment was spent without a book in hand or away from either the Wing or her office. Even now, underneath her concern about Sirius and about their relationship, a mental clock was ticking away, reminding her of all the things she had yet to do.

"My mum used to make those for us before school, when I was younger. Before Hogwarts. And we walked, this large group of us from my neighborhood, all together. We'd sit in these desks and learn about Parliment and multiplication tables and how if you mixed blue and red you'd get purple." Lily's eyes blinked open and she looked at Sirius, a smile with just a hint of longing crossing her face. "It was simpler. Hogwarts was all big and chaotic and life-changing. Somedays, I missed the pancakes and the walk to school and the homework that couldn't possibly result in my eyebrows being singed off."

[toujours_sirius]

She was trying to steer him from her unwillingness to eat, and while he knew better than to push her too hard, he couldn't let the situation go entirely. His eyes lingered on hers for a moment, and then he said in a mild, casual tone, "Well...promise me you're going to eat something before noon, yeah?" He looked back at his plate and took another bite of pancake. "I just don't want you to end up in a hospital bed again." His eyes flicked to hers once more and then to his teacup, from which he took another sip.

[lilypotter60]

"No," she said, trying to keep the edge from her tone. Shrugging a little, Lily attempted a rueful smile. "I'll eat when I'm hungry. Stop worrying, Black." The mention of her stint in the Hospital Wing made her stiffen slightly, lips curving downward.

"I'm fine," she snapped slightly, standing up. "I'm going to go get dressed."

Apparently Sirius shared Cox's opinion that she couldn't handle her own life. Sodding arrogant prats, the both of them. Lily turned to walk towards the bedroom.

[toujours_sirius]

Sirius sighed heavily and then put down his fork and knife. After one more sip of tea (Merlin knew he'd need it the way this conversation was going), he quickly got up and gently caught her around the waist. "Hey. I worry because I care about you, all right?" he said, trying to keep his voice soft and nonthreatening. "And you didn't eat yesterday, and you haven't eaten today, and I just don't want you to get sick." Figuring a drop of humour might help, he added, "I may be your assistant, but I doubt you want me taking over your class because you're not fit to teach it. If it's up to me, the lot of them will be learning how to make Self-Propelled Spitballs instead of studying up on Kappas or whatever it is you want them to learn."

[lilypotter60]

Pulling away, she glared at him. "I'm fit to teach, Black," she hissed quietly. "I'm sodding tired of you blokes riding in on your high horses, telling the little woman that she's got too much on her shoulders." The last bit she said in a mockingly concerned voice. "So why don't you just leave me the hell alone."

Obviously, this conversation had nothing to do with Sirius. But she had been repressing her anger and worry; and that, coupled with her lack of sleep, was not making Lily the most rational.

"I'm not some helpless bird, nor am I some brainless idiot who wanders about aimlessly. I'm good at what I do, and, shockingly, I'm an adult who can sodding take care of myself. Merlin, of all the arrogant, self-absorbed, insane..." She trailed off, still ranting to herself under her breath as she stalked into the bedroom, yanking open her drawers as she searched for clothes.

[toujours_sirius]

Mother of Merlin! Sirius had no idea what that was about, but it appeared to be unrelated to what had happened the night before between the two of them, so all in all, he counted himself as lucky.

For a moment, he just stood there, shocked, finally blinking and then following Lily into their bedroom. "Right. So...I haven't really got a clue what you're talking about. I didn't say any of that. I don't think you're helpless, nor do I think you're rubbish at what you do. I know you can take care of yourself. I just want you to have a good meal." He scratched his head and then just stood there, not knowing what else to say.

[lilypotter60]

Lily might repress things. She might bottle her emotions away. She might even be a bit of a hypocrite. But she knew herself well enough to realize when she was shouting at the wrong person. When Sirius came in, Lily set her shoulders and turned around, ready for a fight. But his words made her sag, slightly, and she felt suddenly tired and ashamed.

"I know," she told him, voice cracking slightly. "You didn't." Scrubbing her face, she avoided his eyes. "I'm just...ranting at the wrong person. I'm sorry, Sirius. Forget it."

[toujours_sirius]

Sirius was still quite boggled, but at least he appeared to be out of the proverbial doghouse - at least, that particular doghouse. He frowned slightly, mainly out of confusion, and then shrugged. "It's all right." Then he walked over to Lily and pulled her into an embrace. "It's all right," he repeated, kissing her briefly. "C'mon, let's go back to the kitchen. I can finish my breakfast, maybe you'll have a little to eat, and you can tell me why in Merlin's name anyone would say -"

And then it dawned on him. "Did Snivellus say those things to you?" Oh, Snape was going to be hearing from Sirius, all right. His eyes narrowed, and his nostrils flared out. "That's it. As soon as I finish my breakfast - because I will not let that greasy git ruin my pancakes - I'm going to hex the hell out of that idiot. C'mon, let's go." He grabbed her hand and turned to stalk back to the kitchen, now feeling very irritated and very awake.

[lilypotter60]

Taken totally off guard, Lily stopped her protest that, no, actually, she still wasn't hungry to stare blankly at him. "What? No." Shaking her head, she tugged his arm, trying to get him to slow down a moment and look at her. "No, Sirius, it wasn't Severus. Do you really think I'd just let him say that to me? Come on, Black. Who are you with, anyway?"

But then one corner of her mouth twitched up, and she slowly slid her arms around his waist, fingers playfully dipping beneath the waistband of his boxers. "But, Merlin," she murmured, eyes sparkling a little, "you're sexy when you're angry." She kissed him slowly, tongue teasing between his lips and tasting the maple syrup from his pancakes. This was much easier than dealing with their issues. She just wanted a moment, just a few precious seconds, where she could remind herself how good they were together.

Also, she didn't want to tell Sirius what Cox had said to her. But that was secondary to really wanting to snog her boyfriend.

[toujours_sirius]

Sirius was so confused. One moment she was angry, the next contrite, and now....

Well, he was no fool, and he certainly wasn't one to look a gift Hippogriff in the mouth. Which meant that he kissed her back, one hand pressing lightly against the back of her head and his mouth easily opening to let her tongue in.

The only sound he managed was a sort of muffled, "Nnnnnnggggg," mainly out of a surprised sort of pleasure.

This was far better than fighting. And far, far better than talking about what had gone on the day before.

[lilypotter60]

Oh, Merlin, yeah it was. She should have thought of this straight off. Pushing him lightly back against the wall, Lily pressed against him, only breaking off the kiss to take a quick, ragged breath before her mouth was on his again.

They were both extremely unclothed, and Lily found it impossible to keep herself from letting her hands wander, one sliding under the fabric of his boxers to cup his arse. The other lay flat against his chest, nails gently scratching down his skin as she kissed him. Lily's hips moved once, purposely, against his.

There may have been three issues Lily had decided she had to bring up with Sirius, but there was one resolution he was going to know nothing about. Lily affectionately called it 'Operation Seduction'. She wanted to make Sirius want her, need her to such an extent that he would stop over-analyzing everything and just be with her. Hoping that their conversation that day would help with the emotional issues, Lily had also decided to address the physical ones, albeit in a less traditional manner.

Sirius would probably not have been surprised to learn she'd made a list of ways she could turn Sirius on, to try and make him want her enough that he'd let go of all the other issues that apparently surrounded their physical relationship. He would have been surprised, though, at some of the items on said list. (Leather featured into some of them. And ice cream. As well as a very naughty school girl outfit and anatomy lessons. Lily was nothing if not creative.)

To that end - leaving him wanting more - Lily kissed him even more deeply, in a way that clearly implied something that required fewer clothes. Her hand moved from the back of his boxers to the front, fingers brushing along the length of him. Then she stepped back, expression innocent and without guile. "Your pancakes are getting cold, Black," she said mildly before turning to walk back into the kitchen.

[toujours_sirius]

Sirius barely knew where he was any more. Snape was long forgotten, as was Lily's refusal to eat. With Lily kissing him like that, the only clear thought in Sirius's mind was that he was ready to take this show right back on the road to their bedroom, or perhaps the bathroom...hell, the kitchen even made for intriguing possibilities.

So when she pulled away, he just stood there for a moment, completely discombobulated, before turning and going after her, snaking his arms around her waist from behind and hunching over her. In a very low voice, he said against her ear, "That's all right. We can warm them up later," and then proceeded to start kissing down her neck.

[lilypotter60]

A slight shiver swept through her at his voice and she bit back a groan. Tipping her head to the side to give him better access, she breathed out, shakily.

'Stick to the plan, Evans,' some quiet voice chided her.

Fucking voice.

"Mmmm." Yeah, not the best start. "You're hungry now, though," she managed thickly. Screwing up her resolve, she moved out of his grasp again. "Come on. I'll share." If choking down a bite or two would help keep OS on track, Lily was willing to do so.

[toujours_sirius]

Ah, dammit, he...really had forgotten about his hunger. Or, rather, he was now hungry in a different sort of way. But if she was willing to eat, then he'd suck it up. His hands falling to his sides, he slid back into the booth, adjusting the front of his boxers along the way, and dished out a pancake onto Lily's empty plate. Then, after sliding the butter and syrup over to her, he resumed working on his, with another pause to adjust his boxers.

[lilypotter60]

Wrinkling her nose at the whole pancake - she really just had been planning on taking a bite of his - she sighed and spread some butter and syrup on top. Taking a tiny bite, she chewed for a moment.

Under the table, her bare foot wandered up his leg, toes playing along his skin, until they found the edge of his boxers. As Lily very blandly took another small bite, washing it down with a swig of tea, her foot stroked along Sirius' inner thigh. Every so often, her toes would brush against the front of his boxers. She wondered just how far she could push him before he'd respond.

[toujours_sirius]

And at that first touch of her foot, his eyes widened slightly, flicking over to her, and his chewing slowed. He shifted in his seat and tried to pay attention to his pancake, but her toes kept moving around, and it was getting hard to focus. He put his fork down and took a sip of tea, and - yep, there was her foot again.

His head slightly tilted, he regarded her for a moment before saying, "You do realise it responds to your touch, right?"