The Secrets Board had left Josh bewildered. The people of Hogwarts appeared to think that:
a. he looked like "
one fugly mofo" as a child,
b. he was endlessly sobbing, by the sheer number of people writing "such and such
makes baby Jesus cry", and, most disturbing of all,
c. he was some sort of
sex object.
There was only one logical conclusion: the
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Now, of course, when a person has holes in them and claims to be Jesus, someone like Suzie was either going to walk away, shaking her head and muttering about crazy people, or she would at least humour him and take a seat. She did the latter. "Okay, oh Son of God, riddle me this one--that whole death thing's not a very fun experience. What's the deal with there being nothing after it? Or is that just some sort of sick kind of purgatory?"
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"You know, I used to buy all of this religious bullshit. I mean...I mean, I wasn't the most devoted person ever, but I had my beliefs. And not that white light, dead relatives to greet you thing--that's all kid's stuff. Used to talk about things like god and religion and the universe and what it was all for, with a few...friends." She shook her head and mumbled, "Don't know why I'm telling you all this..."
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Josh looked at her sympathetically. "And yeah- being dead is some scary shit. I hated it when I had to go through it."
He rubbed absently on the scars on his forehead. "That was... well, look, people have to go through a lot before they can go to heaven. First off, you have to believe in me, so I can save you from the dark and all the other nasty stuff awaiting you. Then... well, we have to get rid of all your sins, everything that keeps you from perfection. Thus... humans have to go through a lot. I'm sorry. I took on everything of yours that I could. Once you believe in me, truly believe in me, you con't have to suffer any more, though."
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"Nevermind that, then. So. What's the occassion? For all of this question answering?"
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"Only just now you're convinced of that? I've known that since...hm. I've known that since before coming here. That people are serious whackjobs in the head sometimes."
Oh, she was no exception. If only Jack knew--he probably did, but if so, they certainly didn't speak about it. Secrets board. Bah. At least she got it out one way or another.
"A lot of them are probably too nutty for anyone to handle anyway."
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She furrowed her brow. Okay, this might just make her brain explode a little. "Nevermind. The universe is a complicated thing anyway. No sense trying to explain any of it."
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