The Secrets Board had left Josh bewildered. The people of Hogwarts appeared to think that:
a. he looked like "
one fugly mofo" as a child,
b. he was endlessly sobbing, by the sheer number of people writing "such and such
makes baby Jesus cry", and, most disturbing of all,
c. he was some sort of
sex object.
There was only one logical conclusion: the students of Hogwarts had Issues. That being the case, Josh set up a small table and some chairs in the Great Hall, under a banner that read, "COMPLAINTS AND QUESTIONS ABOUT THE UNIVERSE ADDRESSED HERE."
After a moment's thought he added on, "YES, I'M JESUS, AND NO I WON'T BE CRYING."