My mother...

[hippiebanana132]

…is completely and utterly drunk.

I just had to stop her from removing her eye make-up with nail varnish remover. She swears she’s "soberly perfect", but I don’t believe her.

It’s 2am, and she’s downstairs munching cornflakes with salt and trying to buy fish tanks off QVC (we have no fish), repeatedly calling up the stairs with random outbursts such

Comments

[ajyablo]

Why did she get drunk... on a thursday night?

[hippiebanana132]

Because she's my mother?

[el_evergreen]

Hahaha!!!! I remember this. Tell your mother she's a complete goober. And ask her if she remembers whether or not the remote spoke back.