Naruto: What Would Jesus Do? (SasuNaru, Some ShikaChouji, SakuIno, GaaNejiGaa)
Title: What Would Jesus Do?
Rating: M / NC-17
Genre: Drama, Romance, Angst, AU, with a dash of Humour
Pairings: SasuNaru / NaruSasu, some ShikaChouji, SakuIno, GaaNejiGaa(?)
Summary: After coming out of the closet, Naruto’s parents decide to send him to a conversion therapy camp. But things get even more complicated once he finds himself obsessing over a misanthropic chain-smoker from an unusual family. Now it's up to him to discover himself, his sexuality, and where his convictions really lie.
A/N: More fanarts!!! Yay! Thanks to dollhouse__x, who drew an incredibly sexy picture of Sasuke smoking in his leather outfit (it’s so sexy it hurts) that can be found here. YOU'RE AMAZING, UNF! ♥
Many thanks to my DREAM beta thepinkangel ♥!! What did I do to deserve you?! ;O;
The next three days passed by agonizingly slow. Every day after a shower, breakfast, and Naruto trying to ‘misplace’ his Life Saver, they would all be herded towards the church for quiet time, have some lunch, be marched into the worship center for a sermon and further instructions, have dinner, and then be sent off to bed.
During the day the isolation was maddening. After all, there were only so many thoughts that could flicker through someone’s mind in that kind of tense, negative atmosphere before the self-doubt and questioning settled in. This caused Naruto to wonder if this was something he really deserved or if it was just another one of those ‘bad things that happen to good people’ things.
At night though, it was a different story. Every night Sasuke would climb to his top bunk (even when he claimed he wouldn’t), challenging him with meaningless arguments and discussions. He acted as the perfect distraction; replacing the rock that had formed at the bottom of Naruto’s stomach during the day with a fire he didn’t know was possible.
But even though the time ticked by slower than a sloth on sake, the three days of emotional solitude were finally over. So that meant that things were going to finally start getting easier…right?
Wrong. Not when there was still group family therapy to deal with, at least.
Naruto’s stomach lurched as he watched his parents park the rain-streaked Lexus in front of him. They got out of the car, their smiles stretched a little to far and voices a little too cheery to be believable as they climbed out and greeted him. He didn’t know why they bothered to put on the front.
No amount of make-up could ever cover up the exhaustion written all over their faces or the dark circles under their eyes. He knew they meant well by it, though; that they were just trying to make him feel better. Too bad it didn’t work.
They each set a hand on one of his shoulders, directing him towards the meeting room almost like a warren would lead a criminal back to their cell. When they entered the small, white-walled room there were already people sitting in the required circle.
If that circle was drawn by a three-year-old, that is. There were so many people sitting too close together or too far away from each other to call it a real circle.
Naruto thought it looked more like an amoeba, really.
He looked around the amoeba-shaped formation, recognizing most of the people there. The pink-haired girl he had sat next to in the cafeteria the first day was the first to catch his eye. They had obviously given her a half-assed dye job; her hair now poorly dyed a spotty gray-ish brown. She had her head bowed, staring down at the tile flooring with her hands folded in her lap, her parents on either side of her.
The strawberry-blonde woman sitting next her-obviously her mother-was glaring heatedly at the blonde girl’s mother across the room. Naruto could practically see the lines of tension shooting between them as they locked in a heated staring contest.
He noticed that the blonde-haired girl was seated between the other two boys he recognized. The chubby boy was there, feeling even more nervous than Naruto if the sweat stains and slight shaking indicated anything. He looked like he was about ready to go up on stage in front of millions of people rather than just sit and talk to a small group.
Naruto shifted his gaze over to the boy with the pineapple-like hair, who was seated fairly far away from the rest of the group with both his parents. His elbow rested on the windowsill as he gazed out at the clouds, his father looking just about as bored to be there as him.
One of the new kids was seated near him, sporting the most bizarre bowl-shaped hair cut and fuzzy eyebrows Naruto had ever seen. The boy reminded him of a frog with his buggy eyes and abuse of the color green; along with the man sitting beside him, who looked like an older version of him that shared the same strange haircut and same green obsession.
Their outfits blended in so much with the camp’s woodsy surroundings that they both looked like they were in camouflage.
Naruto nearly fell forward when his mother nudged him in the direction of an empty chair. He slinked towards it, slightly embarrassed that he hadn’t even realized he’d stopped moving during his people watching. Sitting down next to a red-haired boy with a Chinese symbol tattooed on his forehead, he couldn’t help but gawk at the obscure boy as he took his seat.
Despite his small stature, there was something intimidating in the way that he held himself. He sat with his arms folded stiffly over his chest, his face blank and his eyes closed. There were some black stains around his eyes and the skin around them looked red and irritated. It was like he had been wearing gobs of eyeliner that someone had tried to forcefully scrub off, and from the looks of it, failed.
Naruto shuddered as he pictured what must’ve happened in his mind. It couldn’t have been pretty. That kid didn’t look like a person anyone would want to mess with.
Looking away, he startled slightly when he realized there were more people in the room. They were so still and quiet, he hadn’t even noticed them when he first walked in. Sasuke and a new, long-haired boy were sitting with what Naruto assumed was their father.
Sitting as far away as possible from the rest of the group; they sat close enough to each other to make it obvious they knew one another, but yet far enough away to show that they probably weren’t very fond of the other.
Looking at the long-haired boy, Naruto frowned slightly as he remembered the camp’s strict policy on hair length for boys. Yet, it had been three days into the camp and the boy’s low ponytail still reached his waist. For a moment he wondered how the brunette had managed to convince the camp to let him keep it, before realizing that the boy’s father had the same long, flowing hair.
The man looked like he was a wealthy, successful businessman in his newly pressed chocolate brown suit, even though his lengthy ponytail didn’t seem to fit with the rest of his look. He probably paid the camp off in order to let the boy keep his hair. Long hair must’ve been a family thing…along with creepy eyes.
Both of them had creepy eyes so light they almost looked white. That wasn’t what made them so unnerving, though. Their eyes never really appeared to focus on anything they looked at, making it seem more like there where looking through the object rather than at it.
Naruto was getting the willies just by looking at them. Especially since the long-haired boy kept staring in his direction. What if he had x-ray vision? Somehow the idea of someone checking out his spleen didn’t appeal to Naruto. He just hoped the kid was looking at the red head next to him instead.
Deciding not to dwell at it, he opted to look over at Sasuke instead. Something about the boy made him smile immediately, especially as he recalled the past few days with the Uchiha; but the smile quickly faded when he took in the raven’s appearance.
Sasuke had his hands on his knees and was sitting up a bit too straight for it to be comfortable, making Naruto wonder if someone had snuck into their cabin in the middle of the night and surgically implanted a metal plank into his back. His posture was perfect, the kind of beau ideal that only someone who had been professionally trained in manners and etiquette could achieve.
Even though his face was blank, there was something solemn about his eyes as he stared down at the white, speckled tiles that made up the floor. Naruto frowned, not understanding what brought on the change…until he saw the man sitting beside him.
If Sasuke had a stick shoved up his ass, this guy had the rest of the tree up his.
There was something about the man that made Naruto’s skin crawl. He sat just as straight, if not straighter, than Sasuke. His posture was just as perfect too, with his arms crossed tightly across his large chest. His face was stern and tense, looking doubly as intimidating and judgmental as anyone Naruto had seen on the camp’s staff.
But the thing that really struck Naruto was that even though Sasuke kept his face emotionless, his body language revealed he was more uncomfortable and uneasy than Naruto had ever seen him before sitting next to the man.
The loud click and squeak of a door opening sounded, breaking the silence and bringing everyone’s attention to the skinny, fragile looking woman that entered the room. The door slammed shut behind her and the click-clacking of her heels against the tile floor echoed throughout the quiet room as everyone watched her make her way towards the last empty seat.
She sat down, flipping through a few papers attached to the wooden clipboard she brought with her. Naruto squirmed in his seat and someone coughed as she began to write something, the sound of her pen tapping against the documents being the only thing keeping the room from being completely silent.
She finished scribbling and set the pen down, finally looking up at everyone and giving them a cheery smile. “Hello everyone! We’re so glad all of you were able to take the time to be here for your family, especially during this difficult time in their lives!”
Naruto resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Oh yeah, it must’ve been so hard for them to take a whole hour out of their Saturdays just to ‘be there’ for the person that they abandoned. What saints.
“Now, let’s see if I can remember all of your names,” she said will a small chuckle. Looking through the papers once again, she went around the circle and made sure she had the correct names written down on her clipboard.
“Who all here has one or both of their parents here with them?” She asked. The formally pink-haired girl raised her hand, along with the blonde girl, the pineapple-haired boy, the chubby boy, Naruto, and Sasuke.
“Alright, so that’s Sakura Haruno, Ino Yamanaka, Shikamaru Nara, Chouji Akimichi, Naruto Uzumaki, and Sasuke Uchiha, right?” She named off everyone in the order their hands went up, checking their names off of the list as they all nodded in the affirmative.
“So then, Gaara Sabaku, who do you have with you?” She questioned, smiling down at him like he was a lost little boy and she had just asked him if he knew where his mommy was.
Gaara glared at her with a dangerous glint in his aqua eyes, not looking very pleased at being spoken to in such a way. “My family,” he answered flatly in a low monotone that sent a shiver down Naruto’s spine.
“Uhm, well, yes I can see that. But what family members did you bring with you?” She tried again.
A boy in all black sitting next to Gaara sighed; knowing that was the most the woman would be able to get out of him. “I’m Kankuro and that’s Temari,” he answered for the red head, motioning to himself and a blonde girl in pigtails, “we’re his siblings and guardians(1).”
The woman gave a sharp nod and jotted it down on her clipboard, “Okay, thank you! Now Lee Rock and Neji Hyuuga, you two brought your…” she flipped through a few more pages, scanning the contents with her index finger before looking back and forth between the boy with fuzzy eyebrows and the long haired boy, “uncles, correct?”
Neji hesitated a moment before nodding in response, while Lee answered with a polite and proud, “Yes ma’am!”
Writing a few more things down, she finished and set both her pen and her clipboard down in her lap. She folded her hands on top of it and looked around at everyone in the room, still smiling like she just won the Miss Universe pageant.
Naruto wondered idly if the camp’s staff had to wear Vaseline on their teeth to make them smile like that. That’s what he heard they always did for beauty pageants, anyway. Most of the smiles here looked twice as sweet and cheesy as the ones he’d seen on those contestants.
“Okay then, let’s get started,” she said, pulling Naruto from his musings. “Today we will be exploring what caused these same-sex desires, or your root, so to speak.”
Naruto gulped, the pterodactyls in his stomach returning to wreak havoc on his nerves. She was making it sound like she was a doctor trying to find what caused the virus they were spreading around.
It was like homosexuality was a disease and they were trying to figure out which vaccine to give them to cure it.
“I’m sure some of you are wondering why this is important. Well, here at Love in Action, we believe that like every other addiction out there, some outside force triggers homosexuality. If we’re able to find the trigger, your root, then we can give you the necessary life tools you’ll need to fight it.” She clapped her hands together in excitement, ready to begin breaking in her newest recruits, “So who’s first?”
Naruto’s prankster side was tempted to blame Mother Goose, saying that it was the ‘rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub’ nursery rhyme that did him in. Thankfully though, today was one of the days that he chose to actually think before he spoke. So he just sat in the silence, desperately trying not to fidget in the hard, metal fold-up chair.
Looking around the room, she paused for a few moments to allow someone to begin. When only the steady tick of the wall clock answered her, she spoke up. “Any takers?”
Silence.
“Alright, I guess I’ll choose then.” She scanned the circle, her eyes landing on the pineapple-haired boy. “You there, Shikamaru Nara, when do you think you became a homosexual?”
“I don’t know,” the lazy boy sighed as he continued to look at the clouds. “When I was a fetus?”
Mr. Nara gave a small smirk at the response while Mrs. Nara began scolding them both for not taking it seriously in a harsh whisper. Both of them promptly ignored her as they sighed deeply, Shikamaru mumbling something about him probably being gay because women are too troublesome as he watched a bunny-shaped cloud float by outside.
Naruto grinned as he watched the corners of the counselor’s mouth twitch. Her smile faltered slightly at the answer as she gave a look that clearly said that her patience was being tested at the roundabout way Shikamaru had just stated that he thought he was born gay. Naruto decided he liked the pineapple-haired boy.
“That’s not quite what I meant… um, why don’t we get back to you later?” She tucked back a loose strand of hazelnut-colored hair behind her ear that escaped her messy bun, once again scanning over the list of names.
“Why don’t we hear from Lee Rock?” She smiled at him, not looking nearly as eager to get down to the root of their problem as before. “What do you think triggered your homosexual desires?” She said, being more careful with her wording this time.
“Nothing!!! I’m-” Lee cried, stopping mid-sentence and closing his mouth when he saw the disappointed look on his uncle’s face.
Sighing in defeat, he sat up straight and stared down at the floor, losing his nerve to say all the things his uncle had already heard from him but never believed. “Well… I suppose it had something to do with gym class. I must have stared too long one too many times at the other boy’s changing.”
Naruto snickered quietly to himself. It was so obvious that Lee just pulled that answer out of his ass last minute. Watching a bunch of sweaty guys change after being forced to run laps until they puked didn’t turn people gay. Only a complete idiot would buy that lame excuse.
A loud sniffle suddenly caught Naruto’s attention as the man sitting beside Lee began tearing up. “Oh, Lee! Why didn’t you tell me this earlier?! I had no idea such a temptation existed!! Why, if I had known sooner I would have talked to the coach and set up a private changing area for you!!”
Good thing for Lee there was a complete idiot sitting right next to him.
“Oh cruel fate, why did you have to take such a valiant, bright-eyed youth?! This is supposed to be the springtime of his youth, a time for him to find a delicate little lotus flower of his own to spend his youthful days with!! Oh, why does youth have to be both sweet and sour?!” Tears began cascading down his cheeks as he leapt dramatically from his seat, gripping the sides of his head.
Naruto almost swore he saw a picturesque golden sunset and waves crashing behind him in the background.
“I’m sorry, Uncle Gai!” Lee sniffled, tears now streaming down his face as well.
“Oh Lee, don’t worry! I know with hard work and fierce determination you’ll make it through this!!” Gai tried to reassure him, grabbing his shoulders. Even though there were tears still rolling down the man’s face, he gave Lee a smile so bright Naruto felt like he needed sunglasses to look at it.
“Uncle Gai!” Lee cried, embracing him.
“Lee!” Gai also cried, hugging him back.
“Uncle Gai!”
“Lee!”
“Uncle Gai!“
“Lee!”
“Uncle-“
“That’s it!” Sasuke’s father bellowed, standing up and interrupting the tearful duo. “I didn’t spend all that money sending my son here just so he could listen to a bunch of other fags bitch the whole time.”
Almost everyone in the room flinched at the malice in his voice. Except for Sasuke, who was probably used to that kind of reaction. And Gaara, he just looked like he wanted to kill the man for indirectly calling him a fag.
The camp counselor cleared her throat uncomfortably, trying to get his attention even though she looked like she was absolutely terrified of the large, intimidating man. “Um, sir, we don’t use that kind of language-“
Mr. Uchiha ignored her and instead turned to Sasuke, glaring down at him with a hard, angry look in his eyes. “Either come home straight or don’t come home at all.”
Then, without waiting for any response, he turned on his heel and stormed out of the room. Everyone sat where they were, staring at the door the man had just exited in stunned silence. The sound of a metal fold-up chair scraping against the tile floor rang throughout the room as Sasuke got up and walked out of the door, his head bowed and fists clenched tight enough to make his knuckles white.
Naruto turned in his seat, watching every step the raven took until the door shut with a loud clank. He fought the urge to leap up and follow the boy, his heart constricting painfully in his chest as he recalled the look in Mr. Uchiha’s eyes.
How could a father look at his own son with so much… hatred? What could’ve happened between them to make him act like that?
“Naruto Uzumaki?” The woman called out to him, her voice sounding a bit frustrated. Naruto looked up at her, noticing that despite the smile she looked just about as frustrated as she sounded. She must’ve said something to him while he was spacing out and had to repeat it a few times before getting his attention.
“Huh?” Naruto answered smartly, his back still turned to her.
“Can you tell us your root?” She repeated as she took a deep, calming breath, trying to keep her cool and move on with the therapy session after the outburst.
“Uh…” Naruto got that unpleasant tingling sensation between his shoulders from being watched, knowing that there was probably eyes glued to him, watching, waiting to see if he screwed up.
He turned back around and started to sweat, the eyes on him beginning to feel like heat lamps. His mind went completely blank. Then, all of the sudden all he could think about at that moment was finding Sasuke and making sure he was okay.
“I have to pee,” he announced tactlessly, his mind barely even registering what he said as he stood up and left the room.
*****
Sasuke stood on the top step of the wooden building’s porch as he watched his father walk to his overpriced car. He tore through his pockets, pulling out a cigarette and his lighter and glancing back up towards the sleek, black sports car. His eyes narrowed as he spotted the young man sitting in the passenger seat through the windshield.
So that’s why his father was so quick to leave. The bastard had decided to tag along to ensure Sasuke was suffering, and he hadn’t even bothered to come to the therapy session! And he called Sasuke a coward. What a fucking joke.
Realizing that his jaw was clenching again, he tried to relax it, knowing that it wasn’t good for his already pounding head. He watched his father get in and start the car, his gaze still fixed on the man in the passengers seat. That’s when their eyes met.
He subconsciously clenched his jaw tighter to match the constricting feeling in his chest. A fire of rage ignited within him at the impassive look on the other’s face, making his blood boil so hot he was half-surprised it didn’t light his cigarette. Itachi.
Then his father backed out and drove away, leaving behind nothing but fancy tire marks, dust from the dirt road, and Sasuke.
Sasuke looked down only to find that he had clenched his fists at some point and opened them, dropping his crushed cigarette and wiping the bits of tobacco leaves that had stuck to his hand off on his pants. He got out another one and lit it, inhaling as deeply as his lungs would permit.
He was going to need more cigarettes before this was over. Maybe a lung transplant, too.
*****
Naruto walked onto the porch and stood by the door, staring at the back of Sasuke’s head. Something gripped his chest as he watched the boy place a new cigarette to his lips with what sounded like a silent growl of frustration.
The raven’s body was so tense it was making him shake, causing his thumb to fumble as he tried to get the lighter to spark. He finally got it to spark, lighting his cigarette and inhaling so deeply Naruto thought his lungs would explode.
Naruto swallowed thickly. While he had been anxious to get close Sasuke when he was inside, now that we was standing by him, he couldn’t bring himself to move his legs and close the few feet of space between them. Should he say something? Should he really have come out there? Why did he even come out there?
It was Sasuke’s business, Sasuke’s family. He barely knew the boy for Christ’s sake! Why should he expect the raven to talk to him about his personal life? Listening to the nagging voice in the back of his head telling him to continue, that he already knew the answers to those questions, he took a deep breath and walked a couple of step forward so he was close enough to be within speaking range, but not directly behind the Uchiha.
Even though he knew he’d end up rambling and saying something stupid, he started talking, because no matter how difficult talking to him was… silence was harder.
“Heh, you really like the idea of having iron lungs, don’t you?” Sasuke didn’t answer, so he continued.
“I think it’d be pretty cool, actually. It’d make you sound like a superhero or something. Oh, or a cyborg!!” He frowned to himself as he scratched his chin in thought, “but if you were a cyborg then you couldn’t cry or feel or anything, and that’d be pretty crappy…”
“What do you want?” Sasuke called out in a voice so cold it gave Naruto chills, refusing to turn around and look at the blond.
Naruto felt like beating his head against the wall. He came out here to make sure Sasuke was okay and he ended up babbling about cyborgs? Way to go, genius, Naruto thought sarcastically to himself, trying to find the words to say.
It was still too early to crack a joke about it, asking why his father didn’t like gays was too tactless, and asking why he looked so uncomfortable around the man still felt too personal. So, he decided to stop beating around the bush and just state the obvious.
“Your dad… he left pretty fast...” He said in a quiet voice, watching how Sasuke’s fist clenched at the word ‘dad’.
“So?”
“So… do you want to talk about it-“
“No.” Sasuke replied immediately, cutting him off.
“Aw c’mon, it’s not good to hold stuff in!” Naruto pleaded, suddenly forgetting his nervousness the more he talked with the stoic boy.
“Fuck off.” The raven shot back with a growl, exhaling all of the smoke from his lungs.
Naruto rolled his eyes at Sasuke’s oh-so charming behavior. “Yanno, it’s not like I’m not going to judge you or anything. Hell, I’m about as judgmental as a rock! It’s just…” his words trailed off as he looked down at his feet, kicking a few stray pebbles that had been tracked onto the wooden porch.
“Just what?” Sasuke asked, looking at the blond out of the corner of his eye.
Naruto suddenly thought back to night when Sasuke had climbed up into his bed. The hurt look in the raven’s eyes that still made his stomach squirm flashed before his eyes as he remembered what made him decide to kiss the boy.
“Sometimes… it’s just nice to get stuff out of you, get it off your chest,” he began, taking a few slow steps closer to Sasuke. “Sometimes just knowing that there’s someone out there that’s just willing to listen, even if they might not understand or say anything back, just the fact that they’re there, that they’re listening… that’s more than enough.”
They stood in silence for a few moments, listening to the wind rustling the fallen leaves as Naruto’s words finally sank in. The blond looked down at his loose shoelaces dejectedly, feeling stupid now for saying those things. Just as he was about to turn and leave, a smooth, deep voice stopped him.
“…Idiot,” Sasuke finally breathed out, his voice soft and affectionate despite the insult. He sat down on the top step, scooting over so there was enough room for someone else to sit down beside him. ”Sit down.”
Naruto looked up, surprised to see Sasuke looking back at him. The corners of his mouth rose in a dazzling smile as he walked towards the Uchiha, closing the distance between them as he sat down next to him.
They sat in a comfortable silence for a few moments; Naruto listening to Sasuke’s steady inhales and exhales as he puffed on his sin stick, the tension seeming to slowly drain away around them.
“Hey hey, do you think that if you had iron lungs you’d have super strong breath or something?” Naruto leaned back on his elbows and stared out at the woods, grinning as he continued his previous ramblings, “Maaaan, how awesome would that be? You’d sneeze and then, poof! Instant hurricane! No one would ever want to mess with a dude that could wipe out an entire city just because he has a cold!” Naruto turned to him in excitement, “Hey, maybe I should get some too!!”
“You don’t need iron lungs for that, moron.” Sasuke said, pulling his cigarette from his lips and looking at the blond.
“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I mean, I’m already badass enough as it is!” Naruto grinned at him, puffing out his chest.
“No. You just already have super strong breath,” Sasuke deadpanned with a smirk.
“Hey! I didn’t mean it like that!!!” Naruto squawked, only making Sasuke smirk more as the raven flicked the remainder of his cigarette onto the dirt path below them.
He glared at the Uchiha, sitting up straight and crossing his arms over his chest before looking away with a pout. “…Asshole.”
Despite the fact that he was supposed to be acting angry with Sasuke, he couldn’t help but smile to himself. Because when he saw the usually firm, flat line of Sasuke’s mouth tilt up in a small, concealed smile out of the corner of his eyes, for the first time that week, it felt like he’d actually done something right. And that alone was enough to lift the weight that had been sitting on his chest.
They stayed out on the porch for the remainder of the group session. The time spent just bickering, watching the clouds, and blowing off some steam; all the while sitting shoulder-to-shoulder, side-by-side.
Sometimes we just need somebody to lean on.
1. In case you’re wondering, Kankuro and Temari are 18 and Gaara is 17. As for everyone else, they’re all about 16 or 17.
Before you ask, yes I borrowed the ‘root’ idea from the movie But I’m a Cheerleader! I just thought it was the best thing to begin family therapy off with.
Chapter: [ 1], [ 2], [ 3], [4], [ 5], [ 6], [ 7]
Rating: M / NC-17
Genre: Drama, Romance, Angst, AU, with a dash of Humour
Pairings: SasuNaru / NaruSasu, some ShikaChouji, SakuIno, GaaNejiGaa(?)
Summary: After coming out of the closet, Naruto’s parents decide to send him to a conversion therapy camp. But things get even more complicated once he finds himself obsessing over a misanthropic chain-smoker from an unusual family. Now it's up to him to discover himself, his sexuality, and where his convictions really lie.
A/N: More fanarts!!! Yay! Thanks to dollhouse__x, who drew an incredibly sexy picture of Sasuke smoking in his leather outfit (it’s so sexy it hurts) that can be found here. YOU'RE AMAZING, UNF! ♥
Many thanks to my DREAM beta thepinkangel ♥!! What did I do to deserve you?! ;O;
The next three days passed by agonizingly slow. Every day after a shower, breakfast, and Naruto trying to ‘misplace’ his Life Saver, they would all be herded towards the church for quiet time, have some lunch, be marched into the worship center for a sermon and further instructions, have dinner, and then be sent off to bed.
During the day the isolation was maddening. After all, there were only so many thoughts that could flicker through someone’s mind in that kind of tense, negative atmosphere before the self-doubt and questioning settled in. This caused Naruto to wonder if this was something he really deserved or if it was just another one of those ‘bad things that happen to good people’ things.
At night though, it was a different story. Every night Sasuke would climb to his top bunk (even when he claimed he wouldn’t), challenging him with meaningless arguments and discussions. He acted as the perfect distraction; replacing the rock that had formed at the bottom of Naruto’s stomach during the day with a fire he didn’t know was possible.
But even though the time ticked by slower than a sloth on sake, the three days of emotional solitude were finally over. So that meant that things were going to finally start getting easier…right?
Wrong. Not when there was still group family therapy to deal with, at least.
Naruto’s stomach lurched as he watched his parents park the rain-streaked Lexus in front of him. They got out of the car, their smiles stretched a little to far and voices a little too cheery to be believable as they climbed out and greeted him. He didn’t know why they bothered to put on the front.
No amount of make-up could ever cover up the exhaustion written all over their faces or the dark circles under their eyes. He knew they meant well by it, though; that they were just trying to make him feel better. Too bad it didn’t work.
They each set a hand on one of his shoulders, directing him towards the meeting room almost like a warren would lead a criminal back to their cell. When they entered the small, white-walled room there were already people sitting in the required circle.
If that circle was drawn by a three-year-old, that is. There were so many people sitting too close together or too far away from each other to call it a real circle.
Naruto thought it looked more like an amoeba, really.
He looked around the amoeba-shaped formation, recognizing most of the people there. The pink-haired girl he had sat next to in the cafeteria the first day was the first to catch his eye. They had obviously given her a half-assed dye job; her hair now poorly dyed a spotty gray-ish brown. She had her head bowed, staring down at the tile flooring with her hands folded in her lap, her parents on either side of her.
The strawberry-blonde woman sitting next her-obviously her mother-was glaring heatedly at the blonde girl’s mother across the room. Naruto could practically see the lines of tension shooting between them as they locked in a heated staring contest.
He noticed that the blonde-haired girl was seated between the other two boys he recognized. The chubby boy was there, feeling even more nervous than Naruto if the sweat stains and slight shaking indicated anything. He looked like he was about ready to go up on stage in front of millions of people rather than just sit and talk to a small group.
Naruto shifted his gaze over to the boy with the pineapple-like hair, who was seated fairly far away from the rest of the group with both his parents. His elbow rested on the windowsill as he gazed out at the clouds, his father looking just about as bored to be there as him.
One of the new kids was seated near him, sporting the most bizarre bowl-shaped hair cut and fuzzy eyebrows Naruto had ever seen. The boy reminded him of a frog with his buggy eyes and abuse of the color green; along with the man sitting beside him, who looked like an older version of him that shared the same strange haircut and same green obsession.
Their outfits blended in so much with the camp’s woodsy surroundings that they both looked like they were in camouflage.
Naruto nearly fell forward when his mother nudged him in the direction of an empty chair. He slinked towards it, slightly embarrassed that he hadn’t even realized he’d stopped moving during his people watching. Sitting down next to a red-haired boy with a Chinese symbol tattooed on his forehead, he couldn’t help but gawk at the obscure boy as he took his seat.
Despite his small stature, there was something intimidating in the way that he held himself. He sat with his arms folded stiffly over his chest, his face blank and his eyes closed. There were some black stains around his eyes and the skin around them looked red and irritated. It was like he had been wearing gobs of eyeliner that someone had tried to forcefully scrub off, and from the looks of it, failed.
Naruto shuddered as he pictured what must’ve happened in his mind. It couldn’t have been pretty. That kid didn’t look like a person anyone would want to mess with.
Looking away, he startled slightly when he realized there were more people in the room. They were so still and quiet, he hadn’t even noticed them when he first walked in. Sasuke and a new, long-haired boy were sitting with what Naruto assumed was their father.
Sitting as far away as possible from the rest of the group; they sat close enough to each other to make it obvious they knew one another, but yet far enough away to show that they probably weren’t very fond of the other.
Looking at the long-haired boy, Naruto frowned slightly as he remembered the camp’s strict policy on hair length for boys. Yet, it had been three days into the camp and the boy’s low ponytail still reached his waist. For a moment he wondered how the brunette had managed to convince the camp to let him keep it, before realizing that the boy’s father had the same long, flowing hair.
The man looked like he was a wealthy, successful businessman in his newly pressed chocolate brown suit, even though his lengthy ponytail didn’t seem to fit with the rest of his look. He probably paid the camp off in order to let the boy keep his hair. Long hair must’ve been a family thing…along with creepy eyes.
Both of them had creepy eyes so light they almost looked white. That wasn’t what made them so unnerving, though. Their eyes never really appeared to focus on anything they looked at, making it seem more like there where looking through the object rather than at it.
Naruto was getting the willies just by looking at them. Especially since the long-haired boy kept staring in his direction. What if he had x-ray vision? Somehow the idea of someone checking out his spleen didn’t appeal to Naruto. He just hoped the kid was looking at the red head next to him instead.
Deciding not to dwell at it, he opted to look over at Sasuke instead. Something about the boy made him smile immediately, especially as he recalled the past few days with the Uchiha; but the smile quickly faded when he took in the raven’s appearance.
Sasuke had his hands on his knees and was sitting up a bit too straight for it to be comfortable, making Naruto wonder if someone had snuck into their cabin in the middle of the night and surgically implanted a metal plank into his back. His posture was perfect, the kind of beau ideal that only someone who had been professionally trained in manners and etiquette could achieve.
Even though his face was blank, there was something solemn about his eyes as he stared down at the white, speckled tiles that made up the floor. Naruto frowned, not understanding what brought on the change…until he saw the man sitting beside him.
If Sasuke had a stick shoved up his ass, this guy had the rest of the tree up his.
There was something about the man that made Naruto’s skin crawl. He sat just as straight, if not straighter, than Sasuke. His posture was just as perfect too, with his arms crossed tightly across his large chest. His face was stern and tense, looking doubly as intimidating and judgmental as anyone Naruto had seen on the camp’s staff.
But the thing that really struck Naruto was that even though Sasuke kept his face emotionless, his body language revealed he was more uncomfortable and uneasy than Naruto had ever seen him before sitting next to the man.
The loud click and squeak of a door opening sounded, breaking the silence and bringing everyone’s attention to the skinny, fragile looking woman that entered the room. The door slammed shut behind her and the click-clacking of her heels against the tile floor echoed throughout the quiet room as everyone watched her make her way towards the last empty seat.
She sat down, flipping through a few papers attached to the wooden clipboard she brought with her. Naruto squirmed in his seat and someone coughed as she began to write something, the sound of her pen tapping against the documents being the only thing keeping the room from being completely silent.
She finished scribbling and set the pen down, finally looking up at everyone and giving them a cheery smile. “Hello everyone! We’re so glad all of you were able to take the time to be here for your family, especially during this difficult time in their lives!”
Naruto resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Oh yeah, it must’ve been so hard for them to take a whole hour out of their Saturdays just to ‘be there’ for the person that they abandoned. What saints.
“Now, let’s see if I can remember all of your names,” she said will a small chuckle. Looking through the papers once again, she went around the circle and made sure she had the correct names written down on her clipboard.
“Who all here has one or both of their parents here with them?” She asked. The formally pink-haired girl raised her hand, along with the blonde girl, the pineapple-haired boy, the chubby boy, Naruto, and Sasuke.
“Alright, so that’s Sakura Haruno, Ino Yamanaka, Shikamaru Nara, Chouji Akimichi, Naruto Uzumaki, and Sasuke Uchiha, right?” She named off everyone in the order their hands went up, checking their names off of the list as they all nodded in the affirmative.
“So then, Gaara Sabaku, who do you have with you?” She questioned, smiling down at him like he was a lost little boy and she had just asked him if he knew where his mommy was.
Gaara glared at her with a dangerous glint in his aqua eyes, not looking very pleased at being spoken to in such a way. “My family,” he answered flatly in a low monotone that sent a shiver down Naruto’s spine.
“Uhm, well, yes I can see that. But what family members did you bring with you?” She tried again.
A boy in all black sitting next to Gaara sighed; knowing that was the most the woman would be able to get out of him. “I’m Kankuro and that’s Temari,” he answered for the red head, motioning to himself and a blonde girl in pigtails, “we’re his siblings and guardians(1).”
The woman gave a sharp nod and jotted it down on her clipboard, “Okay, thank you! Now Lee Rock and Neji Hyuuga, you two brought your…” she flipped through a few more pages, scanning the contents with her index finger before looking back and forth between the boy with fuzzy eyebrows and the long haired boy, “uncles, correct?”
Neji hesitated a moment before nodding in response, while Lee answered with a polite and proud, “Yes ma’am!”
Writing a few more things down, she finished and set both her pen and her clipboard down in her lap. She folded her hands on top of it and looked around at everyone in the room, still smiling like she just won the Miss Universe pageant.
Naruto wondered idly if the camp’s staff had to wear Vaseline on their teeth to make them smile like that. That’s what he heard they always did for beauty pageants, anyway. Most of the smiles here looked twice as sweet and cheesy as the ones he’d seen on those contestants.
“Okay then, let’s get started,” she said, pulling Naruto from his musings. “Today we will be exploring what caused these same-sex desires, or your root, so to speak.”
Naruto gulped, the pterodactyls in his stomach returning to wreak havoc on his nerves. She was making it sound like she was a doctor trying to find what caused the virus they were spreading around.
It was like homosexuality was a disease and they were trying to figure out which vaccine to give them to cure it.
“I’m sure some of you are wondering why this is important. Well, here at Love in Action, we believe that like every other addiction out there, some outside force triggers homosexuality. If we’re able to find the trigger, your root, then we can give you the necessary life tools you’ll need to fight it.” She clapped her hands together in excitement, ready to begin breaking in her newest recruits, “So who’s first?”
Naruto’s prankster side was tempted to blame Mother Goose, saying that it was the ‘rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub’ nursery rhyme that did him in. Thankfully though, today was one of the days that he chose to actually think before he spoke. So he just sat in the silence, desperately trying not to fidget in the hard, metal fold-up chair.
Looking around the room, she paused for a few moments to allow someone to begin. When only the steady tick of the wall clock answered her, she spoke up. “Any takers?”
Silence.
“Alright, I guess I’ll choose then.” She scanned the circle, her eyes landing on the pineapple-haired boy. “You there, Shikamaru Nara, when do you think you became a homosexual?”
“I don’t know,” the lazy boy sighed as he continued to look at the clouds. “When I was a fetus?”
Mr. Nara gave a small smirk at the response while Mrs. Nara began scolding them both for not taking it seriously in a harsh whisper. Both of them promptly ignored her as they sighed deeply, Shikamaru mumbling something about him probably being gay because women are too troublesome as he watched a bunny-shaped cloud float by outside.
Naruto grinned as he watched the corners of the counselor’s mouth twitch. Her smile faltered slightly at the answer as she gave a look that clearly said that her patience was being tested at the roundabout way Shikamaru had just stated that he thought he was born gay. Naruto decided he liked the pineapple-haired boy.
“That’s not quite what I meant… um, why don’t we get back to you later?” She tucked back a loose strand of hazelnut-colored hair behind her ear that escaped her messy bun, once again scanning over the list of names.
“Why don’t we hear from Lee Rock?” She smiled at him, not looking nearly as eager to get down to the root of their problem as before. “What do you think triggered your homosexual desires?” She said, being more careful with her wording this time.
“Nothing!!! I’m-” Lee cried, stopping mid-sentence and closing his mouth when he saw the disappointed look on his uncle’s face.
Sighing in defeat, he sat up straight and stared down at the floor, losing his nerve to say all the things his uncle had already heard from him but never believed. “Well… I suppose it had something to do with gym class. I must have stared too long one too many times at the other boy’s changing.”
Naruto snickered quietly to himself. It was so obvious that Lee just pulled that answer out of his ass last minute. Watching a bunch of sweaty guys change after being forced to run laps until they puked didn’t turn people gay. Only a complete idiot would buy that lame excuse.
A loud sniffle suddenly caught Naruto’s attention as the man sitting beside Lee began tearing up. “Oh, Lee! Why didn’t you tell me this earlier?! I had no idea such a temptation existed!! Why, if I had known sooner I would have talked to the coach and set up a private changing area for you!!”
Good thing for Lee there was a complete idiot sitting right next to him.
“Oh cruel fate, why did you have to take such a valiant, bright-eyed youth?! This is supposed to be the springtime of his youth, a time for him to find a delicate little lotus flower of his own to spend his youthful days with!! Oh, why does youth have to be both sweet and sour?!” Tears began cascading down his cheeks as he leapt dramatically from his seat, gripping the sides of his head.
Naruto almost swore he saw a picturesque golden sunset and waves crashing behind him in the background.
“I’m sorry, Uncle Gai!” Lee sniffled, tears now streaming down his face as well.
“Oh Lee, don’t worry! I know with hard work and fierce determination you’ll make it through this!!” Gai tried to reassure him, grabbing his shoulders. Even though there were tears still rolling down the man’s face, he gave Lee a smile so bright Naruto felt like he needed sunglasses to look at it.
“Uncle Gai!” Lee cried, embracing him.
“Lee!” Gai also cried, hugging him back.
“Uncle Gai!”
“Lee!”
“Uncle Gai!“
“Lee!”
“Uncle-“
“That’s it!” Sasuke’s father bellowed, standing up and interrupting the tearful duo. “I didn’t spend all that money sending my son here just so he could listen to a bunch of other fags bitch the whole time.”
Almost everyone in the room flinched at the malice in his voice. Except for Sasuke, who was probably used to that kind of reaction. And Gaara, he just looked like he wanted to kill the man for indirectly calling him a fag.
The camp counselor cleared her throat uncomfortably, trying to get his attention even though she looked like she was absolutely terrified of the large, intimidating man. “Um, sir, we don’t use that kind of language-“
Mr. Uchiha ignored her and instead turned to Sasuke, glaring down at him with a hard, angry look in his eyes. “Either come home straight or don’t come home at all.”
Then, without waiting for any response, he turned on his heel and stormed out of the room. Everyone sat where they were, staring at the door the man had just exited in stunned silence. The sound of a metal fold-up chair scraping against the tile floor rang throughout the room as Sasuke got up and walked out of the door, his head bowed and fists clenched tight enough to make his knuckles white.
Naruto turned in his seat, watching every step the raven took until the door shut with a loud clank. He fought the urge to leap up and follow the boy, his heart constricting painfully in his chest as he recalled the look in Mr. Uchiha’s eyes.
How could a father look at his own son with so much… hatred? What could’ve happened between them to make him act like that?
“Naruto Uzumaki?” The woman called out to him, her voice sounding a bit frustrated. Naruto looked up at her, noticing that despite the smile she looked just about as frustrated as she sounded. She must’ve said something to him while he was spacing out and had to repeat it a few times before getting his attention.
“Huh?” Naruto answered smartly, his back still turned to her.
“Can you tell us your root?” She repeated as she took a deep, calming breath, trying to keep her cool and move on with the therapy session after the outburst.
“Uh…” Naruto got that unpleasant tingling sensation between his shoulders from being watched, knowing that there was probably eyes glued to him, watching, waiting to see if he screwed up.
He turned back around and started to sweat, the eyes on him beginning to feel like heat lamps. His mind went completely blank. Then, all of the sudden all he could think about at that moment was finding Sasuke and making sure he was okay.
“I have to pee,” he announced tactlessly, his mind barely even registering what he said as he stood up and left the room.
*****
Sasuke stood on the top step of the wooden building’s porch as he watched his father walk to his overpriced car. He tore through his pockets, pulling out a cigarette and his lighter and glancing back up towards the sleek, black sports car. His eyes narrowed as he spotted the young man sitting in the passenger seat through the windshield.
So that’s why his father was so quick to leave. The bastard had decided to tag along to ensure Sasuke was suffering, and he hadn’t even bothered to come to the therapy session! And he called Sasuke a coward. What a fucking joke.
Realizing that his jaw was clenching again, he tried to relax it, knowing that it wasn’t good for his already pounding head. He watched his father get in and start the car, his gaze still fixed on the man in the passengers seat. That’s when their eyes met.
He subconsciously clenched his jaw tighter to match the constricting feeling in his chest. A fire of rage ignited within him at the impassive look on the other’s face, making his blood boil so hot he was half-surprised it didn’t light his cigarette. Itachi.
Then his father backed out and drove away, leaving behind nothing but fancy tire marks, dust from the dirt road, and Sasuke.
Sasuke looked down only to find that he had clenched his fists at some point and opened them, dropping his crushed cigarette and wiping the bits of tobacco leaves that had stuck to his hand off on his pants. He got out another one and lit it, inhaling as deeply as his lungs would permit.
He was going to need more cigarettes before this was over. Maybe a lung transplant, too.
*****
Naruto walked onto the porch and stood by the door, staring at the back of Sasuke’s head. Something gripped his chest as he watched the boy place a new cigarette to his lips with what sounded like a silent growl of frustration.
The raven’s body was so tense it was making him shake, causing his thumb to fumble as he tried to get the lighter to spark. He finally got it to spark, lighting his cigarette and inhaling so deeply Naruto thought his lungs would explode.
Naruto swallowed thickly. While he had been anxious to get close Sasuke when he was inside, now that we was standing by him, he couldn’t bring himself to move his legs and close the few feet of space between them. Should he say something? Should he really have come out there? Why did he even come out there?
It was Sasuke’s business, Sasuke’s family. He barely knew the boy for Christ’s sake! Why should he expect the raven to talk to him about his personal life? Listening to the nagging voice in the back of his head telling him to continue, that he already knew the answers to those questions, he took a deep breath and walked a couple of step forward so he was close enough to be within speaking range, but not directly behind the Uchiha.
Even though he knew he’d end up rambling and saying something stupid, he started talking, because no matter how difficult talking to him was… silence was harder.
“Heh, you really like the idea of having iron lungs, don’t you?” Sasuke didn’t answer, so he continued.
“I think it’d be pretty cool, actually. It’d make you sound like a superhero or something. Oh, or a cyborg!!” He frowned to himself as he scratched his chin in thought, “but if you were a cyborg then you couldn’t cry or feel or anything, and that’d be pretty crappy…”
“What do you want?” Sasuke called out in a voice so cold it gave Naruto chills, refusing to turn around and look at the blond.
Naruto felt like beating his head against the wall. He came out here to make sure Sasuke was okay and he ended up babbling about cyborgs? Way to go, genius, Naruto thought sarcastically to himself, trying to find the words to say.
It was still too early to crack a joke about it, asking why his father didn’t like gays was too tactless, and asking why he looked so uncomfortable around the man still felt too personal. So, he decided to stop beating around the bush and just state the obvious.
“Your dad… he left pretty fast...” He said in a quiet voice, watching how Sasuke’s fist clenched at the word ‘dad’.
“So?”
“So… do you want to talk about it-“
“No.” Sasuke replied immediately, cutting him off.
“Aw c’mon, it’s not good to hold stuff in!” Naruto pleaded, suddenly forgetting his nervousness the more he talked with the stoic boy.
“Fuck off.” The raven shot back with a growl, exhaling all of the smoke from his lungs.
Naruto rolled his eyes at Sasuke’s oh-so charming behavior. “Yanno, it’s not like I’m not going to judge you or anything. Hell, I’m about as judgmental as a rock! It’s just…” his words trailed off as he looked down at his feet, kicking a few stray pebbles that had been tracked onto the wooden porch.
“Just what?” Sasuke asked, looking at the blond out of the corner of his eye.
Naruto suddenly thought back to night when Sasuke had climbed up into his bed. The hurt look in the raven’s eyes that still made his stomach squirm flashed before his eyes as he remembered what made him decide to kiss the boy.
“Sometimes… it’s just nice to get stuff out of you, get it off your chest,” he began, taking a few slow steps closer to Sasuke. “Sometimes just knowing that there’s someone out there that’s just willing to listen, even if they might not understand or say anything back, just the fact that they’re there, that they’re listening… that’s more than enough.”
They stood in silence for a few moments, listening to the wind rustling the fallen leaves as Naruto’s words finally sank in. The blond looked down at his loose shoelaces dejectedly, feeling stupid now for saying those things. Just as he was about to turn and leave, a smooth, deep voice stopped him.
“…Idiot,” Sasuke finally breathed out, his voice soft and affectionate despite the insult. He sat down on the top step, scooting over so there was enough room for someone else to sit down beside him. ”Sit down.”
Naruto looked up, surprised to see Sasuke looking back at him. The corners of his mouth rose in a dazzling smile as he walked towards the Uchiha, closing the distance between them as he sat down next to him.
They sat in a comfortable silence for a few moments; Naruto listening to Sasuke’s steady inhales and exhales as he puffed on his sin stick, the tension seeming to slowly drain away around them.
“Hey hey, do you think that if you had iron lungs you’d have super strong breath or something?” Naruto leaned back on his elbows and stared out at the woods, grinning as he continued his previous ramblings, “Maaaan, how awesome would that be? You’d sneeze and then, poof! Instant hurricane! No one would ever want to mess with a dude that could wipe out an entire city just because he has a cold!” Naruto turned to him in excitement, “Hey, maybe I should get some too!!”
“You don’t need iron lungs for that, moron.” Sasuke said, pulling his cigarette from his lips and looking at the blond.
“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I mean, I’m already badass enough as it is!” Naruto grinned at him, puffing out his chest.
“No. You just already have super strong breath,” Sasuke deadpanned with a smirk.
“Hey! I didn’t mean it like that!!!” Naruto squawked, only making Sasuke smirk more as the raven flicked the remainder of his cigarette onto the dirt path below them.
He glared at the Uchiha, sitting up straight and crossing his arms over his chest before looking away with a pout. “…Asshole.”
Despite the fact that he was supposed to be acting angry with Sasuke, he couldn’t help but smile to himself. Because when he saw the usually firm, flat line of Sasuke’s mouth tilt up in a small, concealed smile out of the corner of his eyes, for the first time that week, it felt like he’d actually done something right. And that alone was enough to lift the weight that had been sitting on his chest.
They stayed out on the porch for the remainder of the group session. The time spent just bickering, watching the clouds, and blowing off some steam; all the while sitting shoulder-to-shoulder, side-by-side.
Sometimes we just need somebody to lean on.
1. In case you’re wondering, Kankuro and Temari are 18 and Gaara is 17. As for everyone else, they’re all about 16 or 17.
Before you ask, yes I borrowed the ‘root’ idea from the movie But I’m a Cheerleader! I just thought it was the best thing to begin family therapy off with.
Chapter: [ 1], [ 2], [ 3], [4], [ 5], [ 6], [ 7]