(no subject)
i'm not dead. i promise. i'm hiding.
what's up:
-i work at noco. the pay sucks, my two of my managers are assholes, i work with a stupid girl, the customers are generally stuck-up pigs, and i get crappy hours.
-my boyfriend's name is james. he's laotian. he doesn't have a job or a car now so i'm frustrated as to the direction our relationship is going and i don't know if i want to stick it out and wait for him to shape up.
-i moved in with james and his roomie max at the end of may. i'm moving back home within the next two weeks.
-i'm still desperately in love with my ex-boyfriend.
-i've had five panic attacks and two nervous breakdowns since the end of april, one of which almost landed me back on s-5 after james "oh-so-sweetly" told me to come back to the apartment when i was sane after a fight.
-i've lost many friends, some expendable. i miss most of the people from nccc like jenna, chengu, erik!, cory, freddy, nick, mark, tobias, sean, beef, g-unit, steven, boo, BLR, PM, and countless others.
-i still have a cell phone, courtesy of the over-indulgent ex who decided that, in order to shut me up, the best plan of attack was to buy me things. as a result, i have a free cell phone (yes, i pay the bill). you should call it or text it.
in short:
-i want out of my life. as usual.
"please god, please...don't let me be normal..."
...but i don't want to be crazy either...
why is it a lose/lose situation ALWAYS?
.fuck. .me. .hard.
.islylps.
what's up:
-i work at noco. the pay sucks, my two of my managers are assholes, i work with a stupid girl, the customers are generally stuck-up pigs, and i get crappy hours.
-my boyfriend's name is james. he's laotian. he doesn't have a job or a car now so i'm frustrated as to the direction our relationship is going and i don't know if i want to stick it out and wait for him to shape up.
-i moved in with james and his roomie max at the end of may. i'm moving back home within the next two weeks.
-i'm still desperately in love with my ex-boyfriend.
-i've had five panic attacks and two nervous breakdowns since the end of april, one of which almost landed me back on s-5 after james "oh-so-sweetly" told me to come back to the apartment when i was sane after a fight.
-i've lost many friends, some expendable. i miss most of the people from nccc like jenna, chengu, erik!, cory, freddy, nick, mark, tobias, sean, beef, g-unit, steven, boo, BLR, PM, and countless others.
-i still have a cell phone, courtesy of the over-indulgent ex who decided that, in order to shut me up, the best plan of attack was to buy me things. as a result, i have a free cell phone (yes, i pay the bill). you should call it or text it.
in short:
-i want out of my life. as usual.
"please god, please...don't let me be normal..."
...but i don't want to be crazy either...
why is it a lose/lose situation ALWAYS?
.fuck. .me. .hard.
.islylps.