September is going to be my month dammit.
so the funeral is over with, we all got through it, like well i guess you have to. the visitation was good, started some good conversations with family members i dont get to see that often. susan is here from london, brought sam and lucy so i got to see them which i loved because i miss them a lot. then friday morning sean and i had breakfast with my dad and trish and my uncle scott and my aunt laury and sarah and shannon. it was good, except scott made a comment that i think upset my dad and i'm not really sure how i feel about it. i enjoy talking to my uncle because he's been there for me and i trust him, its just comfortable to talk to him, he kind of fills some fatherly voids for me i guess. so when he calls i always call him back. i dont know why i wouldn't? well but when my dad calls, i never call him back, ever. its just really uncomfortable and unpleasant and i want him to be in my life in some small way, i just dont want to talk to him like that. i dont think im suppose to go from 8 years of silence to yeyea lets talk everyday and be best friends. its just hard. its not like when i see him i think about everything that happened between us or get angry or sad, i dont think about that stuff, i just dont feel like he fits or i dont need him in my life. i dont know, i guess its hard to explain. i do think about that stuff though, like when we were eating and he cut up shannon's food for her and told her to be careful because it was hot. i'm his daughter and he never did that for me. well but my brother said something to scott about how scott dooesn't call him to let him know whats going on and scott said "i call courtney because she always calls me back, i know if i dont reach her that she'll do it". made me uncomfortable. my dad told my uncle a few months ago that he's jealous of the relationship that we have. i dont want him to feel bad, but i'm kind of glad he is jealous, he knows he's missing out on something, something he chose to walk away from.
then we went to the cemetery, it was sad, my 9 year old cousin katherine spoke when the preacher asked if anyone would like to say a few words and said "she was the greatest grandmother that i have ever known". i dont know why, i know it seems harmless, i lost it. as much as my greatgrandmother was on my mind, at that moment i think i was thinking about loss in general when everyone was speaking on how great a person she was or how close they were to her, i was thinking about my grandmother and how much she means to me, katherine speaks, its over. tears. then at the funeral my dad spoke and it was really moving, everybody lost it, afterwards sid commented on how we have no clue how he kept it together, my dad didn't cry until he got down from the pulpit, i would have been a blubbering mess.
then didn't mention us in the obituary or during the funeral, i think she would have liked it for them to mention us all, not saying im just as important as a greatgrandchild to a child, but i dont know, maybe the list was getting too long. but myself, sean, sammy, lucy, sarah, shannon, and baby to be, we're in there. got a chance to talk to some more of my cousins afterwards. talked to bill and trish's son grey, who i haven't gotten to speak with in years, i said "hey we're friends on facebook, we should talk on there sometime", so last night im looking around on facebook and i get a chat thing from him that says "we should talk on this thing sometime" we had a long conversation and it was really great. they live in charlotte, we decided to see each other more often. maybe go down to carpe diem, the restaurant my aunt owns downtown and hang out. the only good thing to come out of a funeral, is of course remembering how important the people around you are and how vital it is to keep the people you love close.
anywho, now to the harris teeter story of the month. so saturday mike finds out what happening as i do, because im at work as im hearing about it. monday when i go into work i hear that the funeral will probably be thursday night so i start trying to find someone to cover my shift, not worried about my ten hour shift on friday. tuesday i find out its on friday and i wont be able to work, go in, tell mike and he flips shit. note i did not tell him the funeral was on thursday when i thought that, i didn't see him after saturday. he says "this is ridiculous, from now on im only letting the first two people who request off, time off, i've been nothing but fair and generous." the problem is we dont have enough people working so only two people requested off its just kim went off to college and lisa can only work 4-8. sorry mike, i can't control when these things happen, i would have loved to work, i need the money. so i call everyone i can think of, then i call other starbuck's in harris teeters to see if anyone can work it. tell travis this on wednesday and he's all like "im sorry to hear about your loss, let me know if you find anyone blah blah" thursday mike calls to say he can switch shifts with me and i'll work his saturday and he'll work my friday, my last resort idea since i wanted to go home this weekend, probably another reason for previously mentioned grandmother tears. well then i tell travis that im still trying, he says "just switch with mike" i say "im trying to do that last" he says "your giving me more work" i said "im handling it" then two minutes later he calls back, starts saying greatgrandparents aren't covered in the policy, he's going to have to write me up. i dont care thats fine, but then he just keeps on, saying i have a bad work ethic, people dont want to work with me, i have a bad reputation amongst my coworkers, i ask him who and he said that doesn't matter. when i said i come to work on time and i leave on time and i work when im scheduled, i've come in when im sick, he said i cant agree to that, i thought man he is ridiculous. then he starts saying i said things i never said and i just give up arguing with him, i say i have to go, write me up, write me up for the other days your complaining about, do whatever you want to do, and i hang up. call my mom, she gets pissed that he talked to me that way, especially when i just lost a famly member, so she calls up to the store and talks to gavin, i dont know why i knew it wasn't going to help and at this point ive already decided to quit. gavin tells her that he cant talk to her because i'm over 18 and she said "then she'll talk to you when she's ready, it'll probably be this week or next". so i go into work on saturday to work mike's shift and he comes in ten minutes after me saying he didn't think i was coming because dave told him i said i wasn't working for the next week and tells me to go home. gavin gets there 20 minutes later and immediately mike takes him outside, they're talking for 20 minutes and im pissed. like livid. gavin gets back and starts saying "your mother said you wouldn't be coming in so we assumed you wouldn't be coming in" i said "first of all you told her you couldn't let her speak for me and then you let her speak for me, secondly that isn't what she said at all, and there was no reason to assume that" he said "you should have called afterwards to let us know you were coming to work" "yea ok she could have been some crazy lady pretending to be my mother and say whatever she wants and then im suppose to call to let people know im coming in when im scheduled to? and she could have not mentioned to me at all that she was calling or she could have only said he wouldn't let me talk to him and thats it. i would have no idea that i would NEED to call and say im coming to work when im suppose to" he asks how long i've been there and then starts talking about my conversation with H.R. and her, daniel and me and travis will have to work this thing out to "see about your continuation with this company" i said "dont bother, i quit".
i'm getting written statements from my coworkers denying what travis said and im taking it up. jerks. i heard from vanessa yesterday that the policy covers blood relatives and that includes greatgrandparents and that travis is a fuck ass and im also suppose to get paid for bereavment. this has been a real pissed off week. luckily i'm feeling like maybe all this crap bad stuff is behind me and september will be a much much better month, even though i have to look for a new job and school is going to be crazy. its always darkest before the glorious sunshine. march on.
then we went to the cemetery, it was sad, my 9 year old cousin katherine spoke when the preacher asked if anyone would like to say a few words and said "she was the greatest grandmother that i have ever known". i dont know why, i know it seems harmless, i lost it. as much as my greatgrandmother was on my mind, at that moment i think i was thinking about loss in general when everyone was speaking on how great a person she was or how close they were to her, i was thinking about my grandmother and how much she means to me, katherine speaks, its over. tears. then at the funeral my dad spoke and it was really moving, everybody lost it, afterwards sid commented on how we have no clue how he kept it together, my dad didn't cry until he got down from the pulpit, i would have been a blubbering mess.
then didn't mention us in the obituary or during the funeral, i think she would have liked it for them to mention us all, not saying im just as important as a greatgrandchild to a child, but i dont know, maybe the list was getting too long. but myself, sean, sammy, lucy, sarah, shannon, and baby to be, we're in there. got a chance to talk to some more of my cousins afterwards. talked to bill and trish's son grey, who i haven't gotten to speak with in years, i said "hey we're friends on facebook, we should talk on there sometime", so last night im looking around on facebook and i get a chat thing from him that says "we should talk on this thing sometime" we had a long conversation and it was really great. they live in charlotte, we decided to see each other more often. maybe go down to carpe diem, the restaurant my aunt owns downtown and hang out. the only good thing to come out of a funeral, is of course remembering how important the people around you are and how vital it is to keep the people you love close.
anywho, now to the harris teeter story of the month. so saturday mike finds out what happening as i do, because im at work as im hearing about it. monday when i go into work i hear that the funeral will probably be thursday night so i start trying to find someone to cover my shift, not worried about my ten hour shift on friday. tuesday i find out its on friday and i wont be able to work, go in, tell mike and he flips shit. note i did not tell him the funeral was on thursday when i thought that, i didn't see him after saturday. he says "this is ridiculous, from now on im only letting the first two people who request off, time off, i've been nothing but fair and generous." the problem is we dont have enough people working so only two people requested off its just kim went off to college and lisa can only work 4-8. sorry mike, i can't control when these things happen, i would have loved to work, i need the money. so i call everyone i can think of, then i call other starbuck's in harris teeters to see if anyone can work it. tell travis this on wednesday and he's all like "im sorry to hear about your loss, let me know if you find anyone blah blah" thursday mike calls to say he can switch shifts with me and i'll work his saturday and he'll work my friday, my last resort idea since i wanted to go home this weekend, probably another reason for previously mentioned grandmother tears. well then i tell travis that im still trying, he says "just switch with mike" i say "im trying to do that last" he says "your giving me more work" i said "im handling it" then two minutes later he calls back, starts saying greatgrandparents aren't covered in the policy, he's going to have to write me up. i dont care thats fine, but then he just keeps on, saying i have a bad work ethic, people dont want to work with me, i have a bad reputation amongst my coworkers, i ask him who and he said that doesn't matter. when i said i come to work on time and i leave on time and i work when im scheduled, i've come in when im sick, he said i cant agree to that, i thought man he is ridiculous. then he starts saying i said things i never said and i just give up arguing with him, i say i have to go, write me up, write me up for the other days your complaining about, do whatever you want to do, and i hang up. call my mom, she gets pissed that he talked to me that way, especially when i just lost a famly member, so she calls up to the store and talks to gavin, i dont know why i knew it wasn't going to help and at this point ive already decided to quit. gavin tells her that he cant talk to her because i'm over 18 and she said "then she'll talk to you when she's ready, it'll probably be this week or next". so i go into work on saturday to work mike's shift and he comes in ten minutes after me saying he didn't think i was coming because dave told him i said i wasn't working for the next week and tells me to go home. gavin gets there 20 minutes later and immediately mike takes him outside, they're talking for 20 minutes and im pissed. like livid. gavin gets back and starts saying "your mother said you wouldn't be coming in so we assumed you wouldn't be coming in" i said "first of all you told her you couldn't let her speak for me and then you let her speak for me, secondly that isn't what she said at all, and there was no reason to assume that" he said "you should have called afterwards to let us know you were coming to work" "yea ok she could have been some crazy lady pretending to be my mother and say whatever she wants and then im suppose to call to let people know im coming in when im scheduled to? and she could have not mentioned to me at all that she was calling or she could have only said he wouldn't let me talk to him and thats it. i would have no idea that i would NEED to call and say im coming to work when im suppose to" he asks how long i've been there and then starts talking about my conversation with H.R. and her, daniel and me and travis will have to work this thing out to "see about your continuation with this company" i said "dont bother, i quit".
i'm getting written statements from my coworkers denying what travis said and im taking it up. jerks. i heard from vanessa yesterday that the policy covers blood relatives and that includes greatgrandparents and that travis is a fuck ass and im also suppose to get paid for bereavment. this has been a real pissed off week. luckily i'm feeling like maybe all this crap bad stuff is behind me and september will be a much much better month, even though i have to look for a new job and school is going to be crazy. its always darkest before the glorious sunshine. march on.