So, I did it
I didn't mean to tell him that I wanted out of the relationship today. At this moment. But it just slipped out.
I keep telling myself that it will get better in the future. This is for the better. I might be alone, but I won't be angry.
i can't believe I did it. Shrugged off the "rebound" relationship. Why did I enter into this one? Why? Couldn't I see the signs from the beginning?
Now, I can focus on work and the other things that are so fulfilling. I can be as nerdy as I want with myself. And by the way - I'm a cat person, not a dog person. BUT, I love my aging dog Lucy and will serve her until she's gone.
So... I think I'll stay where I am until Lucy finally does die, then I'll move out with all of the cats. Tim seems to have a stronger attraction to Vita, the dog, than he does to me. And, to tell you the truth, I am closer to the cats than I am him. Is that a bad thing?
So, I sit here at work. I don't want to work on anything else, so I am going to sit here and let the tears come. There is a ski club meeting tonite, but i really don't want to talk to anybody. Y'know, go drinking, lose inhibitions, cry, and get embarrassed. I guess I'll go grocery shopping and veg for the rest of the day.
This has nothing to do with seeing my ex- yesterday. I tried to make this work. Is it not fair to let your partner know when you've reached the end of your rope and that you don't want to try anymore?
Part of me is scared to death of being alone. But another part realizes that I may not reach my full potential in this relationship - or any relationship for that matter. It's time to recognize that.
Enough for now. I've got therapy tomorrow, and I will get my money's worth this week.
I keep telling myself that it will get better in the future. This is for the better. I might be alone, but I won't be angry.
i can't believe I did it. Shrugged off the "rebound" relationship. Why did I enter into this one? Why? Couldn't I see the signs from the beginning?
Now, I can focus on work and the other things that are so fulfilling. I can be as nerdy as I want with myself. And by the way - I'm a cat person, not a dog person. BUT, I love my aging dog Lucy and will serve her until she's gone.
So... I think I'll stay where I am until Lucy finally does die, then I'll move out with all of the cats. Tim seems to have a stronger attraction to Vita, the dog, than he does to me. And, to tell you the truth, I am closer to the cats than I am him. Is that a bad thing?
So, I sit here at work. I don't want to work on anything else, so I am going to sit here and let the tears come. There is a ski club meeting tonite, but i really don't want to talk to anybody. Y'know, go drinking, lose inhibitions, cry, and get embarrassed. I guess I'll go grocery shopping and veg for the rest of the day.
This has nothing to do with seeing my ex- yesterday. I tried to make this work. Is it not fair to let your partner know when you've reached the end of your rope and that you don't want to try anymore?
Part of me is scared to death of being alone. But another part realizes that I may not reach my full potential in this relationship - or any relationship for that matter. It's time to recognize that.
Enough for now. I've got therapy tomorrow, and I will get my money's worth this week.