Madrigal musings
Madrigal Thoughts
My wonderfully introspective wife has managed to put to electric paper most of what I have been feeling in a much more eloquent way than I ever could. Likely, if you're reading this, you are also friends with her, so feel free to read hers and then come back here. In short, I don't like being depressing, or sad, or melodramatic, and I'm really embarassed by my actions on Sunday.
Anyways, in addition to that, I spoke both to Rosie and Zephyr before leaving, and both had some very wise and useful things to say. Among the most resounding bits included two questions. From Rosie: What would make the game fun again? And from Zephyr: A character functions better if he or she has goals, and more than just one big one. As we bombed on home down the Pike, and all through today, I tried to think on both these things.
As far as making the game fun again...I miss the beer and flowers, as my wife puts it. I fall into the silliness and ninnyhammery like everyone else still, but I miss feeling positive as I putter around town. But since the town's doing (mostly) well, and Grum's family is mostly safe, I reckon the exhaustion stems from real life and not the game. This gather was hard, of course, for many reasons, but it seemed almost insurmountable by Sunday morning. I felt like I was throwing spitballs in combat (which in retrospect, since we were brawling with time vampires and mummy lords, et al, I sort of was). That, losing Chance, and facing down the Dark World sort of snowballed into a big bag of holy hell, I'm an old man with kids, what the hell can I do about any of this? A day later, and I feel much better, like I could strap on the hammer and go break heads. I don't know why this is.
At any rate. The beer and flowers, I've decided, comes from within. Grum is beer and flowers personified. He's also hitting things with a hammer personified. Somewhere between RL and Kath and generally feeling overwhelmed, he's let go of that feeling. Time to get it back. For that, I have a plan.
As far as character goals, Grum doesn't have any, which is a problem. Time to get some. A man of his advanced years has to have a hobby, right? I'll start taking suggestions that don't include getting beaten up, fighting, drinking, or turnips. Or all four.
Thanks to everyone who had patience for me, and for everyone who gave advice, or a hug, or just companionship. It is really, really appreciated.
My wonderfully introspective wife has managed to put to electric paper most of what I have been feeling in a much more eloquent way than I ever could. Likely, if you're reading this, you are also friends with her, so feel free to read hers and then come back here. In short, I don't like being depressing, or sad, or melodramatic, and I'm really embarassed by my actions on Sunday.
Anyways, in addition to that, I spoke both to Rosie and Zephyr before leaving, and both had some very wise and useful things to say. Among the most resounding bits included two questions. From Rosie: What would make the game fun again? And from Zephyr: A character functions better if he or she has goals, and more than just one big one. As we bombed on home down the Pike, and all through today, I tried to think on both these things.
As far as making the game fun again...I miss the beer and flowers, as my wife puts it. I fall into the silliness and ninnyhammery like everyone else still, but I miss feeling positive as I putter around town. But since the town's doing (mostly) well, and Grum's family is mostly safe, I reckon the exhaustion stems from real life and not the game. This gather was hard, of course, for many reasons, but it seemed almost insurmountable by Sunday morning. I felt like I was throwing spitballs in combat (which in retrospect, since we were brawling with time vampires and mummy lords, et al, I sort of was). That, losing Chance, and facing down the Dark World sort of snowballed into a big bag of holy hell, I'm an old man with kids, what the hell can I do about any of this? A day later, and I feel much better, like I could strap on the hammer and go break heads. I don't know why this is.
At any rate. The beer and flowers, I've decided, comes from within. Grum is beer and flowers personified. He's also hitting things with a hammer personified. Somewhere between RL and Kath and generally feeling overwhelmed, he's let go of that feeling. Time to get it back. For that, I have a plan.
As far as character goals, Grum doesn't have any, which is a problem. Time to get some. A man of his advanced years has to have a hobby, right? I'll start taking suggestions that don't include getting beaten up, fighting, drinking, or turnips. Or all four.
Thanks to everyone who had patience for me, and for everyone who gave advice, or a hug, or just companionship. It is really, really appreciated.