*pokes you* You should post more often. It gives me these fascinating insights into your psyche.
For the records, I'd like to point out your aunt had fucking issues and obviously really needed to get laid. Not to mention that I'd kick her ass if she wasn't already dead.
As if Saint Peter would allow you to drag box after box of your own personal journals up before the pearly gates and read to him.
Uh. You actually *believe* in Saint Peter?
Of course, I thought she'd come unglued when she saw I'd paid her $5,000 for it. Considering what her work will mean for mine, that's really nothing at all.
You mean, you actually won? She didn't manage to force you to take it back? *is impressed*
I still hate to think about that day, the way he raised his voice to me. It scared me really. I know he thinks nothing scares me, but when he raises his voice I feel as if everything is coming apart and envision a life alone. I can't have that. I won't live without him. He is my world. I love Karl to distraction.
*pokes you* You should post more often. It gives me these fascinating insights into your psyche.
Well I did just get through pointing out that I've let myself get lax about it. You could remind me if you'd like. I'm sure it'll be infinitely more enjoyable to receive reminders from you than it was when my aunt did it.
For the records, I'd like to point out your aunt had fucking issues and obviously really needed to get laid. Not to mention that I'd kick her ass if she wasn't already dead.
*sigh* So I feel the same way about your father but I dont go trying to kill him now, do I? My aunt was just raised in a severely strict and overly religious household. My mother was smart enough to get away from it early.
Uh. You actually *believe* in Saint Peter?
It was a joke love. I believe there is a higher power. I do not believe there are a bunch of old men running the gate to Heaven or whatever.
You mean, you actually won? She didn't manage to force you to take it back? *is impressed*I direct deposited the money into her account.
( ... )
I'm sure it'll be infinitely more enjoyable to receive reminders from you than it was when my aunt did it.
I could bribe you with blowjobs. *perks up* A blowjob for each paragraph.
*sigh* So I feel the same way about your father but I dont go trying to kill him now, do I?
My father never hit me. By the way, he asked how you were doing in his last e-mail. I suspect he must have been really drunk, but still.
It was a joke love. I believe there is a higher power. I do not believe there are a bunch of old men running the gate to Heaven or whatever.
Oh, thank you. Can you imagine the guy's job? Having to listen to everybody's boring story as they prattle on about how they were really good, deep down, and the sheep fucking incident was just a drunken mistake? Poor guy would want to shoot himself.
I direct deposited the money into her account. It's not as if she had a choice in the matter. And besides, she did work she deserved to get paid for. There is nothing to argue about.
Your stubborness about money is legendary, love. *nods*
I could bribe you with blowjobs. *perks up* A blowjob for each paragraph.
*moan* Kaaaaarl
My father never hit me. By the way, he asked how you were doing in his last e-mail. I suspect he must have been really drunk, but still.
Mental abuse is just as bad as physical abuse in my opinion. What did he say?
Oh, thank you. Can you imagine the guy's job? Having to listen to everybody's boring story as they prattle on about how they were really good, deep down, and the sheep fucking incident was just a drunken mistake? Poor guy would want to shoot himself.
Maybe he likes to sit around with the guys on his time off and joke about the freaks?
Your stubborness about money is legendary, love. *nods*
As is yours
My house would have killed you. It was usually me yelling at my father for being a dick, my mother yelling at whatever pixies or angels she was hallucinating and my father screaming at both of us. Yeah. Hm, I need to get a birthday gift for my dad.
Mental abuse is just as bad as physical abuse in my opinion. What did he say?
Hm, well, he's impressed about my grades (finally let him see them), he's glad I'm doing educational trips (I forgot to mention the deep into the jungle bit), he thinks I should look into grad school too (damn you Sarah) and he asked if you were doing well. Mind you, the words boyfriend or husband haven't been typed on his keyboard yet and I'm not holding my breath. But eh, he remembered your name.
Maybe he likes to sit around with the guys on his time off and joke about the freaks?
Saints and angels don't joke about the freaks, Marton. *tsks at you* I'm shocked.
Sounds scary. When is your father's birthday?
Only my mother would curse at her hallucinations. Hmm... May 12.
No. I'm saying they're adult sized with kitten mentalities
Is now a good time to mention they knocked down that plant you keep in the kitchen? Pippin did it.
What girl?The one who had ribbons in her hair and who let
( ... )
Hm, well, he's impressed about my grades (finally let him see them), he's glad I'm doing educational trips (I forgot to mention the deep into the jungle bit), he thinks I should look into grad school too (damn you Sarah) and he asked if you were doing well. Mind you, the words boyfriend or husband haven't been typed on his keyboard yet and I'm not holding my breath. But eh, he remembered your name.
I'm glad you finally shared something with him love.
Saints and angels don't joke about the freaks, Marton. *tsks at you* I'm shocked.
Well seeing as I dont believe in the Saints running Heaven, I think the fictional ones would
Only my mother would curse at her hallucinations. Hmm... May 12.
What sort of things does your father like?
Is now a good time to mention they knocked down that plant you keep in the kitchen? Pippin did it.Is that why there was dirt on the counter? I wish you'd tell me when they mess with my plants when it happens instead of
( ... )
*looks very, very smug* I should try that next time you get all stubborn.
I'm glad you finally shared something with him love.
You DO realize I'm still lying about almost everything I do, right? I'd freak if he saw my back, for example.
What sort of things does your father like?
Ugh. He's a cliche. Old collector books. Cigars. I never figured out if he genuinely likes those things or if he thinks that fits with the image of a lawyer who suddenly got rich. *rolls my eyes*
I wish you'd tell me when they mess with my plants when it happens instead of trying to hide it. That first plant one of them got in the livingroom died because it wasnt properly taken care of.Hey, I can take care of a plant. My cactus is still alive and everything
( ... )
*looks very, very smug* I should try that next time you get all stubborn.
Look who's taking about being stubborn *eyes you*
You DO realize I'm still lying about almost everything I do, right? I'd freak if he saw my back, for example.
Yes love, I figured there are many things you still keep from him.
Ugh. He's a cliche. Old collector books. Cigars. I never figured out if he genuinely likes those things or if he thinks that fits with the image of a lawyer who suddenly got rich. *rolls my eyes*
I see *calls a broker to order a couple boxes of the finest Cuban cigars available and have them sent to your dad from us*
Hey, I can take care of a plant. My cactus is still alive and everything.
Well then why did that other one almost die? *I know the answer why, but I want you to prove you can take care of my plant*
We just played doctor, really, nothing to get so excited about
Just played doctor *eyes you* I'm not so far gone I dont know some of the stuff that entails when you're young. What exactly did you do?
*raises an eyebrow* Would you prefer me all meek and submissive, love? *thinks you'd get bored in five minutes top*
That is quite possible. It still wouldn't make me love you any less.
Hm. I'm not sure he'll be pleased or he's going to freak. Don't hold your breath for a thank you note, alright?
I'm not expecting so much as a thank you Karl. He is family whether he likes the idea or not. I like to do things for my family. Speaking of which, when is your mother's birthday?
The root system got all broken up? *eyesdart, says that randomly*
You'd have to have done a lot more than let the kittens play with the plant for that to cause significant damage to that particular plant Karl.
Errrr... I think the floor needs some mopping. *tries to escape*
Karl Urban, tell me what you did with that girl *eyes you*
Why do you want to know? Would you fuck Viggo if he asked you?
I know I started this questioning you first and I expect to hear an answer *waits stubbornly*
That is quite possible. It still wouldn't make me love you any less.
*blushes, then squirms* Really? *looks horribly embarrassed then all pleased at the same time*
I'm not expecting so much as a thank you Karl. He is family whether he likes the idea or not. I like to do things for my family. Speaking of which, when is your mother's birthday?
Hm, you know, if I ever want to give him a heart attack, I should mention that one to him. *cackles evilly* *perks up* My mom's is April 21st. Now, she would appreciate it.
You'd have to have done a lot more than let the kittens play with the plant for that to cause significant damage to that particular plant Karl.
Why do I get the feeling I'm failing the quizz? That never, never happens too. Hold me, I'm scared.
Karl Urban, tell me what you did with that girl *eyes you*
Hey, I didn't rape her or anything! Not that a five years old can rape anyone, for that matter, but you know what I mean.
I know I started this questioning you first and I expect to hear an answer *waits stubbornly*
( ... )
*blushes, then squirms* Really? *looks horribly embarrassed then all pleased at the same time*
Absolutely. There is nothing and no person in this world, that could make me love you any less.
Hm, you know, if I ever want to give him a heart attack, I should mention that one to him. *cackles evilly* *perks up* My mom's is April 21st. Now, she would appreciate it.
Tell him what? You didn't tell me it was her birthday? What does she like? We're already late in sending something.
Why do I get the feeling I'm failing the quizz? That never, never happens too. Hold me, I'm scared.
Because you are love. And I would hold you, except we're both in our offices playing at computer wars
Hey, I didn't rape her or anything! Not that a five years old can rape anyone, for that matter, but you know what I mean.
That still does not tell me what exactly it is you DID do.
Absolutely. There is nothing and no person in this world, that could make me love you any less.
*blushes even more* *looks very, very happy*
Tell him what? You didn't tell me it was her birthday? What does she like? We're already late in sending something.
"So, dad, my immoral gay lover is considering you as family." My dad: *has heart attack*
Does that answer your question?
Well, there's a reason I spent two hours on the phone with her at some ungodly hour, now, isn't there? Not my fault you don't read my mind for the important bits of information. My mother loves books. And flowers. She's one of those gardening nuts. *smiles fondly*
Because you are love. And I would hold you, except we're both in our offices playing at computer wars
*looks around at my so-called office. knows damn well you could lose three full grown kittens in here with all the crap.* Uh uh. Office.
That still does not tell me what exactly it is you DID do.Apparently I talked her into taking off her dress. She had yellow ducks on her knickers. I think the
( ... )
"So, dad, my immoral gay lover is considering you as family." My dad: *has heart attack* Does that answer your question?
You didn't tell your parents we're married? I would have told my aunt, were she still alive. I KNOW she'd have keeled over, but I wouldn't care. I tell everyone who I'm married to.
Well, there's a reason I spent two hours on the phone with her at some ungodly hour, now, isn't there? Not my fault you don't read my mind for the important bits of information. My mother loves books. And flowers. She's one of those gardening nuts. *smiles fondly*
I see *eyes you* I told you, if you're not thinking about it, I don't get the information. I must have been elsewhere any given time you actually thought "oh, today is mom's birthday". I will send her a gift from me, as you've already spoken with her.
*looks around at my so-called office. knows damn well you could lose three full grown kittens in here with all the crap.* Uh uh. Office.It is no fault of mine you don't clean that office. When I put it together for you
( ... )
Love, I told my mother. I tell her many things and she heavily edits it for my dad's ears. It's always been that way. She always knew a lot of the shit that I was up to that my dad never heard about or even suspected. She's insane, but not stupid.
I will send her a gift from me, as you've already spoken with her.
She said that since you're rich, you should pay for her ticket to come visit me. There are reasons I love her. *smirks*
It is no fault of mine you don't clean that office. When I put it together for you it was perfectly clean and serviceable. Of course, that was a year ago.
I was too busy having an epic battle with you about buying me a computer to notice the clean and serviceable aspect of the office. So yeah.
Well then perhaps I will call your mother? If you're not going to give me more tales of your past, maybe she will?
It's not that I don't want to tell you, love. Actually, if you knew what to ask about, I could tell you lot of stories. Since I don't actually believe now
( ... )
Love, I told my mother. I tell her many things and she heavily edits it for my dad's ears. It's always been that way. She always knew a lot of the shit that I was up to that my dad never heard about or even suspected. She's insane, but not stupid.
Well I would be happy to stand in front of your dad and tell him I'm your husband.
She said that since you're rich, you should pay for her ticket to come visit me. There are reasons I love her. *smirks*
I just called the ticket agent and arranged a first class, round trip, open ended ticket for her. I will call her tonight and let her know.
I was too busy having an epic battle with you about buying me a computer to notice the clean and serviceable aspect of the office. So yeah.
Honey, you already had one computer in there, I didn't see the reason why you need a second one.
...If something comes back to me, I can always post it in my journal, how's that
( ... )
For the records, I'd like to point out your aunt had fucking issues and obviously really needed to get laid. Not to mention that I'd kick her ass if she wasn't already dead.
As if Saint Peter would allow you to drag box after box of your own personal journals up before the pearly gates and read to him.
Uh. You actually *believe* in Saint Peter?
Of course, I thought she'd come unglued when she saw I'd paid her $5,000 for it. Considering what her work will mean for mine, that's really nothing at all.
You mean, you actually won? She didn't manage to force you to take it back? *is impressed*
I still hate to think about that day, the way he raised his voice to me. It scared me really. I know he thinks nothing scares me, but when he raises his voice I feel as if everything is coming apart and envision a life alone. I can't have that. I won't live without him. He is my world. I love Karl to distraction.
... I'm so sorry. I didn't know it ( ... )
Reply
Well I did just get through pointing out that I've let myself get lax about it. You could remind me if you'd like. I'm sure it'll be infinitely more enjoyable to receive reminders from you than it was when my aunt did it.
For the records, I'd like to point out your aunt had fucking issues and obviously really needed to get laid. Not to mention that I'd kick her ass if she wasn't already dead.
*sigh* So I feel the same way about your father but I dont go trying to kill him now, do I? My aunt was just raised in a severely strict and overly religious household. My mother was smart enough to get away from it early.
Uh. You actually *believe* in Saint Peter?
It was a joke love. I believe there is a higher power. I do not believe there are a bunch of old men running the gate to Heaven or whatever.
You mean, you actually won? She didn't manage to force you to take it back? *is impressed*I direct deposited the money into her account. ( ... )
Reply
I could bribe you with blowjobs. *perks up* A blowjob for each paragraph.
*sigh* So I feel the same way about your father but I dont go trying to kill him now, do I?
My father never hit me. By the way, he asked how you were doing in his last e-mail. I suspect he must have been really drunk, but still.
It was a joke love. I believe there is a higher power. I do not believe there are a bunch of old men running the gate to Heaven or whatever.
Oh, thank you. Can you imagine the guy's job? Having to listen to everybody's boring story as they prattle on about how they were really good, deep down, and the sheep fucking incident was just a drunken mistake? Poor guy would want to shoot himself.
I direct deposited the money into her account. It's not as if she had a choice in the matter. And besides, she did work she deserved to get paid for. There is nothing to argue about.
Your stubborness about money is legendary, love. *nods*
( ... )
Reply
*moan* Kaaaaarl
My father never hit me. By the way, he asked how you were doing in his last e-mail. I suspect he must have been really drunk, but still.
Mental abuse is just as bad as physical abuse in my opinion. What did he say?
Oh, thank you. Can you imagine the guy's job? Having to listen to everybody's boring story as they prattle on about how they were really good, deep down, and the sheep fucking incident was just a drunken mistake? Poor guy would want to shoot himself.
Maybe he likes to sit around with the guys on his time off and joke about the freaks?
Your stubborness about money is legendary, love. *nods*
As is yours
My house would have killed you. It was usually me yelling at my father for being a dick, my mother yelling at whatever pixies or angels she was hallucinating and my father screaming at both of us. Yeah. Hm, I need to get a birthday gift for my dad.
Sounds scary. When is your father's birthday?
Are you saying they're fat? * ( ... )
Reply
*licks my lips, dives under the computer desk*
Mental abuse is just as bad as physical abuse in my opinion. What did he say?
Hm, well, he's impressed about my grades (finally let him see them), he's glad I'm doing educational trips (I forgot to mention the deep into the jungle bit), he thinks I should look into grad school too (damn you Sarah) and he asked if you were doing well. Mind you, the words boyfriend or husband haven't been typed on his keyboard yet and I'm not holding my breath. But eh, he remembered your name.
Maybe he likes to sit around with the guys on his time off and joke about the freaks?
Saints and angels don't joke about the freaks, Marton. *tsks at you* I'm shocked.
Sounds scary. When is your father's birthday?
Only my mother would curse at her hallucinations. Hmm... May 12.
No. I'm saying they're adult sized with kitten mentalities
Is now a good time to mention they knocked down that plant you keep in the kitchen? Pippin did it.
What girl?The one who had ribbons in her hair and who let ( ... )
Reply
*licks my lips, dives under the computer desk*
Hm, well, he's impressed about my grades (finally let him see them), he's glad I'm doing educational trips (I forgot to mention the deep into the jungle bit), he thinks I should look into grad school too (damn you Sarah) and he asked if you were doing well. Mind you, the words boyfriend or husband haven't been typed on his keyboard yet and I'm not holding my breath. But eh, he remembered your name.
I'm glad you finally shared something with him love.
Saints and angels don't joke about the freaks, Marton. *tsks at you* I'm shocked.
Well seeing as I dont believe in the Saints running Heaven, I think the fictional ones would
Only my mother would curse at her hallucinations. Hmm... May 12.
What sort of things does your father like?
Is now a good time to mention they knocked down that plant you keep in the kitchen? Pippin did it.Is that why there was dirt on the counter? I wish you'd tell me when they mess with my plants when it happens instead of ( ... )
Reply
*looks very, very smug* I should try that next time you get all stubborn.
I'm glad you finally shared something with him love.
You DO realize I'm still lying about almost everything I do, right? I'd freak if he saw my back, for example.
What sort of things does your father like?
Ugh. He's a cliche. Old collector books. Cigars. I never figured out if he genuinely likes those things or if he thinks that fits with the image of a lawyer who suddenly got rich. *rolls my eyes*
I wish you'd tell me when they mess with my plants when it happens instead of trying to hide it. That first plant one of them got in the livingroom died because it wasnt properly taken care of.Hey, I can take care of a plant. My cactus is still alive and everything ( ... )
Reply
Look who's taking about being stubborn *eyes you*
You DO realize I'm still lying about almost everything I do, right? I'd freak if he saw my back, for example.
Yes love, I figured there are many things you still keep from him.
Ugh. He's a cliche. Old collector books. Cigars. I never figured out if he genuinely likes those things or if he thinks that fits with the image of a lawyer who suddenly got rich. *rolls my eyes*
I see *calls a broker to order a couple boxes of the finest Cuban cigars available and have them sent to your dad from us*
Hey, I can take care of a plant. My cactus is still alive and everything.
Well then why did that other one almost die? *I know the answer why, but I want you to prove you can take care of my plant*
We just played doctor, really, nothing to get so excited about
Just played doctor *eyes you* I'm not so far gone I dont know some of the stuff that entails when you're young. What exactly did you do?
I'd like to remind ( ... )
Reply
*raises an eyebrow* Would you prefer me all meek and submissive, love? *thinks you'd get bored in five minutes top*
I see *calls a broker to order a couple boxes of the finest Cuban cigars available and have them sent to your dad from us*
Hm. I'm not sure he'll be pleased or he's going to freak. Don't hold your breath for a thank you note, alright?
Well then why did that other one almost die? *I know the answer why, but I want you to prove you can take care of my plant*
The root system got all broken up? *eyesdart, says that randomly*
Just played doctor *eyes you* I'm not so far gone I dont know some of the stuff that entails when you're young. What exactly did you do?
Errrr... I think the floor needs some mopping. *tries to escape*
I know that honey. I'm the one that suggested it. You still didn't answer my question. Would you do it?
Why do you want to know? Would you fuck Viggo if he asked you?
Reply
That is quite possible. It still wouldn't make me love you any less.
Hm. I'm not sure he'll be pleased or he's going to freak. Don't hold your breath for a thank you note, alright?
I'm not expecting so much as a thank you Karl. He is family whether he likes the idea or not. I like to do things for my family. Speaking of which, when is your mother's birthday?
The root system got all broken up? *eyesdart, says that randomly*
You'd have to have done a lot more than let the kittens play with the plant for that to cause significant damage to that particular plant Karl.
Errrr... I think the floor needs some mopping. *tries to escape*
Karl Urban, tell me what you did with that girl *eyes you*
Why do you want to know? Would you fuck Viggo if he asked you?
I know I started this questioning you first and I expect to hear an answer *waits stubbornly*
Reply
*blushes, then squirms* Really? *looks horribly embarrassed then all pleased at the same time*
I'm not expecting so much as a thank you Karl. He is family whether he likes the idea or not. I like to do things for my family. Speaking of which, when is your mother's birthday?
Hm, you know, if I ever want to give him a heart attack, I should mention that one to him. *cackles evilly*
*perks up* My mom's is April 21st. Now, she would appreciate it.
You'd have to have done a lot more than let the kittens play with the plant for that to cause significant damage to that particular plant Karl.
Why do I get the feeling I'm failing the quizz? That never, never happens too. Hold me, I'm scared.
Karl Urban, tell me what you did with that girl *eyes you*
Hey, I didn't rape her or anything! Not that a five years old can rape anyone, for that matter, but you know what I mean.
I know I started this questioning you first and I expect to hear an answer *waits stubbornly* ( ... )
Reply
Absolutely. There is nothing and no person in this world, that could make me love you any less.
Hm, you know, if I ever want to give him a heart attack, I should mention that one to him. *cackles evilly* *perks up* My mom's is April 21st. Now, she would appreciate it.
Tell him what? You didn't tell me it was her birthday? What does she like? We're already late in sending something.
Why do I get the feeling I'm failing the quizz? That never, never happens too. Hold me, I'm scared.
Because you are love. And I would hold you, except we're both in our offices playing at computer wars
Hey, I didn't rape her or anything! Not that a five years old can rape anyone, for that matter, but you know what I mean.
That still does not tell me what exactly it is you DID do.
Fine, but if I answer you, you have to answer me.
Are you going to answer me or not?
Reply
*blushes even more* *looks very, very happy*
Tell him what? You didn't tell me it was her birthday? What does she like? We're already late in sending something.
"So, dad, my immoral gay lover is considering you as family."
My dad: *has heart attack*
Does that answer your question?
Well, there's a reason I spent two hours on the phone with her at some ungodly hour, now, isn't there? Not my fault you don't read my mind for the important bits of information.
My mother loves books. And flowers. She's one of those gardening nuts. *smiles fondly*
Because you are love. And I would hold you, except we're both in our offices playing at computer wars
*looks around at my so-called office. knows damn well you could lose three full grown kittens in here with all the crap.* Uh uh. Office.
That still does not tell me what exactly it is you DID do.Apparently I talked her into taking off her dress. She had yellow ducks on her knickers. I think the ( ... )
Reply
You didn't tell your parents we're married? I would have told my aunt, were she still alive. I KNOW she'd have keeled over, but I wouldn't care. I tell everyone who I'm married to.
Well, there's a reason I spent two hours on the phone with her at some ungodly hour, now, isn't there? Not my fault you don't read my mind for the important bits of information. My mother loves books. And flowers. She's one of those gardening nuts. *smiles fondly*
I see *eyes you* I told you, if you're not thinking about it, I don't get the information. I must have been elsewhere any given time you actually thought "oh, today is mom's birthday". I will send her a gift from me, as you've already spoken with her.
*looks around at my so-called office. knows damn well you could lose three full grown kittens in here with all the crap.* Uh uh. Office.It is no fault of mine you don't clean that office. When I put it together for you ( ... )
Reply
Love, I told my mother. I tell her many things and she heavily edits it for my dad's ears. It's always been that way. She always knew a lot of the shit that I was up to that my dad never heard about or even suspected. She's insane, but not stupid.
I will send her a gift from me, as you've already spoken with her.
She said that since you're rich, you should pay for her ticket to come visit me. There are reasons I love her. *smirks*
It is no fault of mine you don't clean that office. When I put it together for you it was perfectly clean and serviceable. Of course, that was a year ago.
I was too busy having an epic battle with you about buying me a computer to notice the clean and serviceable aspect of the office. So yeah.
Well then perhaps I will call your mother? If you're not going to give me more tales of your past, maybe she will?
It's not that I don't want to tell you, love. Actually, if you knew what to ask about, I could tell you lot of stories. Since I don't actually believe now ( ... )
Reply
Well I would be happy to stand in front of your dad and tell him I'm your husband.
She said that since you're rich, you should pay for her ticket to come visit me. There are reasons I love her. *smirks*
I just called the ticket agent and arranged a first class, round trip, open ended ticket for her. I will call her tonight and let her know.
I was too busy having an epic battle with you about buying me a computer to notice the clean and serviceable aspect of the office. So yeah.
Honey, you already had one computer in there, I didn't see the reason why you need a second one.
...If something comes back to me, I can always post it in my journal, how's that ( ... )
Reply
Leave a comment