please kehna... pyar se.
Main Khiladi Tu Anari is not a great movie. Bloody hilarious? Yes. The gayest film ever? Yes. So so very 90's? Yes.
This is going to be spoilerous as hell but I dare you not to click. Edit: Now unlocked for bonus fun time for all.
Warning: Mullets and chest hair may cause sudden loss of appetite.
Meet Saif. He has a mullet. He's singing one of the worst Hinglish songs in the history of mankind. He's playing an actor in this movie.
Raveena Tandon makes a special appearance, and gets to enjoy Saif's special attention. She's obviously thrilled.
First of all: wall omgwtf. Second: they sing this. In English. And it is fucking catchy.
Choreographer? Fired. So fired.
Stylist? Ditto. Unless he is gay. Then he is excused, or maybe not. No excuse will do for these guys. Just ...ohmyfuckingholygod. Too gay.
I roflmao at these dance moves.
Choreographer? So fired. And here's the song for those who want to see the choreographies (for whatever reason) and hear the awful, awful song.
Plot development!
Gasp!
....
Wait! It's just a movie he's character is in. With Raveena. And he looks so impressed by his performance.
Yes, really!
I love Saif's face in this one.
His character has ambitions.
...and thus we get the entry of...
Akshay, who is just the kind of manly storm Saif wants to play.
So Akki kicks butt.
...and Saif observes.
And falls in love...
Akki is not a fan of Saif.
But his boss totally is.
Akki is still unimpressed.
But Saif is extremely willing to learn!
Oh yeah, there's this girl who's involved in the plot somewhat and played by Shilpa Shetty who is cute but looks like an animated character sometimes.
THE IRONY.
First kiss? Could it be?
Awww..
I've become immune to 90's Bollywood's bad fashion. Almost. Almost.
Ouch!
Oooooooh.
The following is SO one of my favourite scenes in the film.
SAIF IS SUCH A GIRL OMG.
Aww.
Kya jodi hai.
Akkibatics!
Puppy eyes at Akshay.
Further puppy eyes.
Akki's sister in the film is a huuuge fan of Saif. So he watches his movies on TV. Yes, Aashiq Awaara, totally my pick for a good Saif Ali Khan film. Mmmmullet.
Akki brings Saif home with him. Because...
And 24 hours of loving!
He's such a movie star.
Hokay!
Akki has minor difficulties...
...which he overcomes.
He's such a movie star, bwahahaha.
Subtitler on a field day - he actually says, "bhai" meaning brother or 'bro' or whatever, but subtitler translates it "dear", thus leading to one of the gayest subtitles in the history of mankind.
Saifu the method actor.
Oh yeah, since Akki's sister is such a fan of Saif, she tries to commit suicide and naturally after this Saif falls for her. No, don't question it, the logic of this plot is ...absolutely nonexistant. But whatever. They have a song together.
"Hi, Bollywood song lyric cliché library?"
"Yeah, send us something really wild and new!"
...Salty and cold?
Further gayness...
Deepak Kumar is Saif's character's name, btw.
Hahahaha. Akki is drunk. And through this one story twist I really don't want to get into because a) IT MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE OMFG WHO WROTE THIS SCRIPT?! and b) it's so fucking vapid it hurts me, anyway, he and Shilpa fall in love. And have a song together.
Choreographer? So fired.
So so so fired.
Why do they not fire this guy already?
And just when one is nearly willing to believe Akki and Shilpa to be cute together, they bring on Akki's instruments of love...
Trumpet.
and violin.
And of course, there's the industrial tube. Because those are soooo what you should have in every Bollywood picturization. Whatever and back to gay stuff.
Touching.
Saif leaves. Why? Well, that's another plot twist you really don't want to know about.
Awww!
But then he returns and there's more gay drama than on Queer As Folk.
I really don't need to point out the gayness in the next shots. You can just sit back and watch.
Then there's the film's title song. You can find it here, but there is one picture that pretty much sums it up:
Yeah. Yeah.
I got it in my head that bloody!Saif has nice arms. Mary doesn't see it so I guess I'm crazy. :(
Saif plays a cop in his film!
Akki's love set his pants on fire. It's symbolical.
Buddy movies for life!
And that's it.
This is going to be spoilerous as hell but I dare you not to click. Edit: Now unlocked for bonus fun time for all.
Warning: Mullets and chest hair may cause sudden loss of appetite.
Meet Saif. He has a mullet. He's singing one of the worst Hinglish songs in the history of mankind. He's playing an actor in this movie.
Raveena Tandon makes a special appearance, and gets to enjoy Saif's special attention. She's obviously thrilled.
First of all: wall omgwtf. Second: they sing this. In English. And it is fucking catchy.
Choreographer? Fired. So fired.
Stylist? Ditto. Unless he is gay. Then he is excused, or maybe not. No excuse will do for these guys. Just ...ohmyfuckingholygod. Too gay.
I roflmao at these dance moves.
Choreographer? So fired. And here's the song for those who want to see the choreographies (for whatever reason) and hear the awful, awful song.
Plot development!
Gasp!
....
Wait! It's just a movie he's character is in. With Raveena. And he looks so impressed by his performance.
Yes, really!
I love Saif's face in this one.
His character has ambitions.
...and thus we get the entry of...
Akshay, who is just the kind of manly storm Saif wants to play.
So Akki kicks butt.
...and Saif observes.
And falls in love...
Akki is not a fan of Saif.
But his boss totally is.
Akki is still unimpressed.
But Saif is extremely willing to learn!
Oh yeah, there's this girl who's involved in the plot somewhat and played by Shilpa Shetty who is cute but looks like an animated character sometimes.
THE IRONY.
First kiss? Could it be?
Awww..
I've become immune to 90's Bollywood's bad fashion. Almost. Almost.
Ouch!
Oooooooh.
The following is SO one of my favourite scenes in the film.
SAIF IS SUCH A GIRL OMG.
Aww.
Kya jodi hai.
Akkibatics!
Puppy eyes at Akshay.
Further puppy eyes.
Akki's sister in the film is a huuuge fan of Saif. So he watches his movies on TV. Yes, Aashiq Awaara, totally my pick for a good Saif Ali Khan film. Mmmmullet.
Akki brings Saif home with him. Because...
And 24 hours of loving!
He's such a movie star.
Hokay!
Akki has minor difficulties...
...which he overcomes.
He's such a movie star, bwahahaha.
Subtitler on a field day - he actually says, "bhai" meaning brother or 'bro' or whatever, but subtitler translates it "dear", thus leading to one of the gayest subtitles in the history of mankind.
Saifu the method actor.
Oh yeah, since Akki's sister is such a fan of Saif, she tries to commit suicide and naturally after this Saif falls for her. No, don't question it, the logic of this plot is ...absolutely nonexistant. But whatever. They have a song together.
"Hi, Bollywood song lyric cliché library?"
"Yeah, send us something really wild and new!"
...Salty and cold?
Further gayness...
Deepak Kumar is Saif's character's name, btw.
Hahahaha. Akki is drunk. And through this one story twist I really don't want to get into because a) IT MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE OMFG WHO WROTE THIS SCRIPT?! and b) it's so fucking vapid it hurts me, anyway, he and Shilpa fall in love. And have a song together.
Choreographer? So fired.
So so so fired.
Why do they not fire this guy already?
And just when one is nearly willing to believe Akki and Shilpa to be cute together, they bring on Akki's instruments of love...
Trumpet.
and violin.
And of course, there's the industrial tube. Because those are soooo what you should have in every Bollywood picturization. Whatever and back to gay stuff.
Touching.
Saif leaves. Why? Well, that's another plot twist you really don't want to know about.
Awww!
But then he returns and there's more gay drama than on Queer As Folk.
I really don't need to point out the gayness in the next shots. You can just sit back and watch.
Then there's the film's title song. You can find it here, but there is one picture that pretty much sums it up:
Yeah. Yeah.
I got it in my head that bloody!Saif has nice arms. Mary doesn't see it so I guess I'm crazy. :(
Saif plays a cop in his film!
Akki's love set his pants on fire. It's symbolical.
Buddy movies for life!
And that's it.