Black Friday: NPC Shopocalypse

[volginswaifu]

Very suddenly, in the afterglow of a warm Thanksgiving dinner (for those of whom are Yankee bastards), the shopping gates of hell open in the Nexus and in spill NPCs until every nook and cranny of hallway is a bustling like a New York subway

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[volginswaifu]

[Ivan was unfortunate enough to be in the hall at the time. After nearly getting trampled he's being pushed along by the crowd now, cursing and griping at them loudly while hitting whoever is closest with the butt of his shotgun.]

/Who the hell are you people?! Get off of me!/

[butthurtsleeper]

[Unfortunately, EVA also happened to be in the middle of the hallway when the "Black Friday sales" began. He has already run out of bullets, and was running low on energy as well. He needs to rest; the man's been running around since early this morning.]

[The spy doesn't hear Raikov's voice nearby with all of the loud and frantic yells of NPC's drowning it out. EVA just continues moving until he comes across a nearby closet, and ducks inside.]

[volginswaifu]

[Finally fed up, Ivan clears part of the crowd with a few blasts of his shotgun. With the hall population dwindling for half-a-second he has a chance to look around, spot a closet, and duck shamelessly inside.]

[He presses back against something strangely warm in there.]

[butthutsrleeper]

[EVA barely got time to look at his newfound roommate- or 'closetmate', perhaps- before he stormed inside and back up against the spy's chest. Naturally, EVA first assumed the person entering to be one of those crazed shoppers- so he was quick to shove Raikov away in the darkness of the closet.]

Get off!

[vrtrainee]

I don't even own a DVD player!

[Shouts a significantly shorter blonde, currently drowning within the mass of people.]

[He's currently trying his damnedest to reach a door and escape.]

[vrtrainee]

[More to himself than anything:] What the heck is a remora...?

[Jack usually isn't up for being saved, but considering this guy just flung an old lady like the Oblivion physics engine a ragdoll, maybe he'd better listen.]

[But then, Jack got an idea.]

Hey everybody, there's a, uh...really good sale down the hall! [He pointed in the opposite direction, and everybody went stampeding, taking him violently with them.]

No, wait! Aah! [LOOKS LIKE HE JUST MADE THINGS WORSE.]

[neurotic_insect]

[You'll find Dimitri defending his personal domain against rampant consumerism with a grenade rifle, massive waves of psychic enedrgy sending NPCs flying and his husky proudly attacking people left and right.]

/GET THE HELL AWAY FROM MY HOUSE!/

[vrtrainee]

[Jack's being uncomfortably pushed along by the crowd. He keeps trying to politely excuse himself, but it's not exactly working.]

[Even trying to rudely excuse himself wasn't working.]

Can't you guys just let me get to a door?!