Un-inter-rupted!

[firstcrusader]

So browsing around on Noel's blog today, I came across an interesting post, which, of course, especially grabbed my attention due to the retention of the name Lisa:

The Ten Commandments of Marital Purity 1. I shall have no other human relationships before Lisa, including the kids

Comments

[zionchild]

We've got this urge as humans to set down rules, and rules suck. Even Christ himself was against them. He came in the midst of a bunch of pharasaical idiocy and reduced a metric crapton of fence laws to two rules that were intentionally vague. This sort of a contract is only good for one thing, and that's keeping record of wrong. The loving thing would be to keep up communication even when it seems redundant.

I agree with most of the things others have said. This smacks of mainstream, unthinking, hand-fed Christianity. Also:

#1 is dumb. "Sorry, Jimmy, I don't love you as much as I love your mom." Consider the implications. If your husband is spending too much time with the kids, tell him so.

#9 is some Josh Harris shit and I want to make him more Christ-like through crucifixion. I once saw a couple argue about whether or not he's allowed to see Sin City. It wasn't because of the atmosphere of complete despair, apathy, or godlessness, nor the gore and disregard for life, but because there be some tittays in there for about 30 seconds. This is Christian stupidity at its finest.

#8, however, is COMPLETE AND UTTER BULLSHIT AND WILL TURN YOUR MARRIAGE INTO AN EMPTY AND HOLLOW PIT OF DESPAIR UNTO DEATH. Have I emphasized this enough yet?

No, you shouldn't be discussing intimate details on a regular basis, by yourself, at length, with a member of the opposite sex. No, you shouldn't discuss your marriage more with your friends than your spouse. But NOT talking about things when they're happening is just as stupid and dishonest, and it's making marriages into confused, secretive, lonely things.

When someone asks you, "Hey, how's marriage treating you?", and it isn't treating you well, what're you supposed to say? "Like hell, Bob, but that's classified information!" When you have a disagreement with a good friend, you don't spread the word around church, but you don't squelch it when it comes up either. In both cases it's a sensitive subject, and the other party is dear to you. Others, *especially other married couples*, might have good advice from their experience.

And frankly, what's wrong with casual discussion of sex? If you think about it, we've put sex on the same plane as poop in our heads - it's something that should be hidden and grosses people out and referred to in vague euphemisms in even the closest of company. Is it a secret or something that married people have sex? (fyi: I do.) Is it anything but encouraging to say your partner's exceptionally good in the sack? (fyi: She is.) Is it really that bad of an idea for married couples to get together and address issues of sexual frustration or confusion? (fyi: you're not married.)

The first year, when Kate and I were just figuring out sex and FRICKING A IT WAS NOT AS PLEASURABLE OR EASY AS EXPECTED, I would have killed for a good married guy friend to talk that stuff over with. I remember Kate and I discussing stuff with Beth Stalker in hushed tones at fellowship, and you wouldn't believe the dirty looks that we got.

I wonder what people in ancient Israel would have thought about our attitude toward sex. Imagine your mom and dad having sex in the next room. Now imagine the walls are tent cloth. Now imagine you're the unmarried guy in the tent fifteen feet away.