When
Fandom: none
Warning: OC Angst, Character death
Characters: Christopher/Gene
When Christopher is four, mother decides she wants another child. Mother and Father go through a lot of trouble and a lot of papers and too many days of talking to people and not paying attention to Christopher before they bring back a boy.
His name is Gene. Gene is blue. That's because he's an Avian and not a real boy. He's got feathers for hair and a tail feathers and he can fly when he really concentrates but he doesn't.
Christopher doesn't know what to think of him at all.
When Christopher is five, he finally decides that Gene is alright, even if Gene is older than him by three years and Gene always does big boy things instead of little boy things with him. Gene smiles all the time and never gets angry, even when Christopher accidentally steps on his tail feathers or calls him names when Chris is sleepy and cranky.
Gene always looks after Christopher and Christopher likes that. Chris likes when Gene gets his bottle for him or helps mother to make pancakes. Chris also likes that Gene doesn't like stirring pancake batter so he always lets Christopher do that instead.
When Christopher is eight, he thinks that Gene is an amazing older brother because Gene always teaches him things he learned in school. Gene comes home with perfect grades and perfect manners and he teaches Chris all the tips and tricks to get good grades too. Gene helps Christopher understand his math. Gene teaches Christopher the capitals of all the countries. Gene shows Christopher the best berries to pick in school and Gene always looks out for Christopher.
Chris thinks that he likes his older brother a lot and he would hate it if Gene ever left. He also thinks that all the bullies that pick on Gene for being blue all the time are very stupid. Blue is such a nice colour.
When Christopher is ten, he starts to feel insecure. All the teachers are telling him how Gene is so well mannered and so good in school. They talk of how nice he is to everyone, how forgiving he is and how he never raises his voice. Gene is perfect and Christopher doesn't match up.
Gene doesn't say anything about it and Christopher doesn't try to talk to him about it because he doesn't want to hurt his brother by saying something mean by accident. Gene never seems to hurt though, and that seems strange. Chris never points it out. It wouldn't do to give the bullies more reason to try and attack his older brother.
When Christopher is thirteen, he talks to Gene.
"Don't you feel angry?" He asks his older brother when they are washing the car together. Gene does it even though it gets suds all over his feathers. Gene smiles at him and Christopher decides that he doesn't quite like that smile at all.
"That everyone bullies you and talks about how you're blue." Christopher asks.
"Blue is a nice colour." Gene says, still smiling. He doesn't look up from cleaning the car and he doesn't stop either. "What is 'angry' anyway?" he asks, hesitating on the word 'angry'.
That's when Christopher realises that something is wrong with Gene. He realises that Gene has never been angry simply because he doesn't understand the emotion. He doesn't know what being angry means or what it's about. Christopher sets about teaching him.
When Christopher is fourteen, he has his first kiss and it's not with a girl. He cries and panics and tells Gene and all Gene says almost anxiously is "What is this 'disgust' anyway? You're still my brother, aren't you?"
And that's when Christopher realises that something is really, really wrong with his brother. Gene doesn't understand human emotions at all.
It's not just anger. Gene doesn't understand disgust, happiness, joy, sadness or anything Christopher can name. Christopher looks it up. It's not a common thing but some Avians have this problem. They can function but have to learn what it means to feel emotions.
Christopher makes it his life's mission at fourteen, to teach Gene about emotion.
When Christopher is eighteen, he gets drunk and kisses Gene. They end up doing something that siblings aren't supposed to do. Gene doesn't understand this when Christopher explains that they can't do it again. Chris learns that Gene can be very persuasive when he wants and they end up doing it again.
Chris feels disgusted with himself but somehow, he wanders back to Gene because Gene never judges him, never denies him, never hates him.
When Christopher is twenty-one, their parents find out and they're kicked out of the house but Gene finds a flat and they stay together, about ten minutes away from university. Gene makes money writing papers for people who are too lazy to do so themselves and Chris finds a job as a waiter and part time tutor.
They settle into a a routine of domesticity where Gene cooks dinner and Chris always brings home the groceries. They have two bicycles instead of a car and they live without television or video games but it's okay because they have each other.
When Christopher is twenty-eight, he buys a car with Gene because he's been feeling poorly and can't cycle anymore. When he collapses at their front door, Gene takes him to the hospital and they get the devastating news.
It explains all the fatigue, the pain, the breathlessness that he experiences. Gene isn't smiling but he also isn't saying anything. The cancer has spread and Christopher is given only a year or two to live.
Gene insists on treatment.
When Christopher is twenty-nine, he looks nothing like the person he used to be. He has no hair, he is thin and frail and so sick of looking at himself in reflective surfaces. Gene always likes bright and shiny things and Chris is so scared that Gene will leave him but Gene doesn't do anything like that.
Gene is always still there, always still getting the shopping and taking him to the doctor in their car.
When Christopher is thirty, he stops getting treatment because it isn't working and he wants Gene to have a life and not blow all their savings on something useless. Gene stays with him despite him getting frailer each and everyday.
He realises that he has never once said three special words to Gene and when he says them, Gene says them back but with a sad look. Chris is happy that at least, he has taught Gene how to feel emotions. He sees the wistfulness in his 'brother's eyes and he wishes he could erase that look of longing.
When Christopher is thirty-one, he is on his deathbed and there is nothing Gene can do to help him. He lies on the bed, having sent his parents away earlier to spend his last seconds with Gene.
"I love you." He repeats them almost obsessively, smiling each time Gene says 'I know' or 'I love you too'.
He says them one last time, reaching up to touch Gene's beautiful blue plumage. Gene touches his fingers and grips them tight then whispers 'I know' for the last time. Christopher closes his eyes and succumbs.
He never sees the lone tear that rolls down Gene's cheeks.
He never hears 'But what is love?'
Warning: OC Angst, Character death
Characters: Christopher/Gene
When Christopher is four, mother decides she wants another child. Mother and Father go through a lot of trouble and a lot of papers and too many days of talking to people and not paying attention to Christopher before they bring back a boy.
His name is Gene. Gene is blue. That's because he's an Avian and not a real boy. He's got feathers for hair and a tail feathers and he can fly when he really concentrates but he doesn't.
Christopher doesn't know what to think of him at all.
When Christopher is five, he finally decides that Gene is alright, even if Gene is older than him by three years and Gene always does big boy things instead of little boy things with him. Gene smiles all the time and never gets angry, even when Christopher accidentally steps on his tail feathers or calls him names when Chris is sleepy and cranky.
Gene always looks after Christopher and Christopher likes that. Chris likes when Gene gets his bottle for him or helps mother to make pancakes. Chris also likes that Gene doesn't like stirring pancake batter so he always lets Christopher do that instead.
When Christopher is eight, he thinks that Gene is an amazing older brother because Gene always teaches him things he learned in school. Gene comes home with perfect grades and perfect manners and he teaches Chris all the tips and tricks to get good grades too. Gene helps Christopher understand his math. Gene teaches Christopher the capitals of all the countries. Gene shows Christopher the best berries to pick in school and Gene always looks out for Christopher.
Chris thinks that he likes his older brother a lot and he would hate it if Gene ever left. He also thinks that all the bullies that pick on Gene for being blue all the time are very stupid. Blue is such a nice colour.
When Christopher is ten, he starts to feel insecure. All the teachers are telling him how Gene is so well mannered and so good in school. They talk of how nice he is to everyone, how forgiving he is and how he never raises his voice. Gene is perfect and Christopher doesn't match up.
Gene doesn't say anything about it and Christopher doesn't try to talk to him about it because he doesn't want to hurt his brother by saying something mean by accident. Gene never seems to hurt though, and that seems strange. Chris never points it out. It wouldn't do to give the bullies more reason to try and attack his older brother.
When Christopher is thirteen, he talks to Gene.
"Don't you feel angry?" He asks his older brother when they are washing the car together. Gene does it even though it gets suds all over his feathers. Gene smiles at him and Christopher decides that he doesn't quite like that smile at all.
"That everyone bullies you and talks about how you're blue." Christopher asks.
"Blue is a nice colour." Gene says, still smiling. He doesn't look up from cleaning the car and he doesn't stop either. "What is 'angry' anyway?" he asks, hesitating on the word 'angry'.
That's when Christopher realises that something is wrong with Gene. He realises that Gene has never been angry simply because he doesn't understand the emotion. He doesn't know what being angry means or what it's about. Christopher sets about teaching him.
When Christopher is fourteen, he has his first kiss and it's not with a girl. He cries and panics and tells Gene and all Gene says almost anxiously is "What is this 'disgust' anyway? You're still my brother, aren't you?"
And that's when Christopher realises that something is really, really wrong with his brother. Gene doesn't understand human emotions at all.
It's not just anger. Gene doesn't understand disgust, happiness, joy, sadness or anything Christopher can name. Christopher looks it up. It's not a common thing but some Avians have this problem. They can function but have to learn what it means to feel emotions.
Christopher makes it his life's mission at fourteen, to teach Gene about emotion.
When Christopher is eighteen, he gets drunk and kisses Gene. They end up doing something that siblings aren't supposed to do. Gene doesn't understand this when Christopher explains that they can't do it again. Chris learns that Gene can be very persuasive when he wants and they end up doing it again.
Chris feels disgusted with himself but somehow, he wanders back to Gene because Gene never judges him, never denies him, never hates him.
When Christopher is twenty-one, their parents find out and they're kicked out of the house but Gene finds a flat and they stay together, about ten minutes away from university. Gene makes money writing papers for people who are too lazy to do so themselves and Chris finds a job as a waiter and part time tutor.
They settle into a a routine of domesticity where Gene cooks dinner and Chris always brings home the groceries. They have two bicycles instead of a car and they live without television or video games but it's okay because they have each other.
When Christopher is twenty-eight, he buys a car with Gene because he's been feeling poorly and can't cycle anymore. When he collapses at their front door, Gene takes him to the hospital and they get the devastating news.
It explains all the fatigue, the pain, the breathlessness that he experiences. Gene isn't smiling but he also isn't saying anything. The cancer has spread and Christopher is given only a year or two to live.
Gene insists on treatment.
When Christopher is twenty-nine, he looks nothing like the person he used to be. He has no hair, he is thin and frail and so sick of looking at himself in reflective surfaces. Gene always likes bright and shiny things and Chris is so scared that Gene will leave him but Gene doesn't do anything like that.
Gene is always still there, always still getting the shopping and taking him to the doctor in their car.
When Christopher is thirty, he stops getting treatment because it isn't working and he wants Gene to have a life and not blow all their savings on something useless. Gene stays with him despite him getting frailer each and everyday.
He realises that he has never once said three special words to Gene and when he says them, Gene says them back but with a sad look. Chris is happy that at least, he has taught Gene how to feel emotions. He sees the wistfulness in his 'brother's eyes and he wishes he could erase that look of longing.
When Christopher is thirty-one, he is on his deathbed and there is nothing Gene can do to help him. He lies on the bed, having sent his parents away earlier to spend his last seconds with Gene.
"I love you." He repeats them almost obsessively, smiling each time Gene says 'I know' or 'I love you too'.
He says them one last time, reaching up to touch Gene's beautiful blue plumage. Gene touches his fingers and grips them tight then whispers 'I know' for the last time. Christopher closes his eyes and succumbs.
He never sees the lone tear that rolls down Gene's cheeks.
He never hears 'But what is love?'