Illusions and Trains
I have no clue what I'm going to do with my life anymore.
I was so worked up over this that I missed Pride today because I was researching different programs. I'm not too upset over missing Pride, because I woke up with my hair a disaster and my friend bailed on me via e-mail over the night, but I was planning on just going to the parade and check it out, maybe run into some people I know. But I didn't, instead I'm now close to going into a Railway Conductor program at BCIT.
I was thinking back over my past year and I realized my happiest times were in chem labs, english class, and my intro to physics. Everything else was like having teeth pulled. It wasn't that the material was hard, it was just I was finding myself caring about the subjects less and less. Then I got my Ochem mark back, a class I was actually really into, and it was so low that I just couldn't see myself doing any better considering how much I enjoyed the class and how much effort I put into it. Maybe a scholarly career isn't for me, because I don't think I can spend my hours pouring over microbiology textbooks and stuff, because I'm not passionate enough about the end result. I think being a veterinarian would be great, but as the year continued I became less and less sure it was for me, and it became more and more just something that I can set my sights on so I'm not completely lost.
Then I came across an interview with a girl who was a railway conductor when I was trying to find a job interview article on mookychick.com. The girl made more than I would as a veterinarian, only worked 35 hours a week, said no two days are the same, and it seemed like a pretty sweet deal. I've always had a respect for the trains because of their significance to western Canada, and I can easily see myself doing it. The course is only 1 term in vancouver, with an internship in Port Alberni, and the tuition cost would be the same as my next year here at UNBC where I'm not sure what the hell I'm doing anymore. So I figure I could go do this program, get a certificate out of it, and even if it isn't what I want to spend the rest of my life doing, it gives me something I can do until I figure that out and it isn't going to hurt, plus it is less of a waste of money then me just taking courses I'm losing more and more interest in.
I haven't made up my mind yet, but they have a lecture on August 9th about the program, so I'm thinking about going to that.
I was so worked up over this that I missed Pride today because I was researching different programs. I'm not too upset over missing Pride, because I woke up with my hair a disaster and my friend bailed on me via e-mail over the night, but I was planning on just going to the parade and check it out, maybe run into some people I know. But I didn't, instead I'm now close to going into a Railway Conductor program at BCIT.
I was thinking back over my past year and I realized my happiest times were in chem labs, english class, and my intro to physics. Everything else was like having teeth pulled. It wasn't that the material was hard, it was just I was finding myself caring about the subjects less and less. Then I got my Ochem mark back, a class I was actually really into, and it was so low that I just couldn't see myself doing any better considering how much I enjoyed the class and how much effort I put into it. Maybe a scholarly career isn't for me, because I don't think I can spend my hours pouring over microbiology textbooks and stuff, because I'm not passionate enough about the end result. I think being a veterinarian would be great, but as the year continued I became less and less sure it was for me, and it became more and more just something that I can set my sights on so I'm not completely lost.
Then I came across an interview with a girl who was a railway conductor when I was trying to find a job interview article on mookychick.com. The girl made more than I would as a veterinarian, only worked 35 hours a week, said no two days are the same, and it seemed like a pretty sweet deal. I've always had a respect for the trains because of their significance to western Canada, and I can easily see myself doing it. The course is only 1 term in vancouver, with an internship in Port Alberni, and the tuition cost would be the same as my next year here at UNBC where I'm not sure what the hell I'm doing anymore. So I figure I could go do this program, get a certificate out of it, and even if it isn't what I want to spend the rest of my life doing, it gives me something I can do until I figure that out and it isn't going to hurt, plus it is less of a waste of money then me just taking courses I'm losing more and more interest in.
I haven't made up my mind yet, but they have a lecture on August 9th about the program, so I'm thinking about going to that.