bleh.

[etherealsquid]

I should just make myself a miserable human being and become a writer, i can't stop writing once I start, and i only really start when I'm depressed, when something's stuck in my head and wont get out. I just reread eveything else i wrote on my computer, saved and ahid away in some file so i wouldn't have to read it, so I could try and move on. I've relived all the feelings, the sadness, brokenheartedness, anger and guilt. I feel like i need a vacation from the world, to escape to something simpler, without everyone and their problems, without my own problems, somewhere unlimited, bright and free.
but I have a paper to write, and test the day after that.

lead weights tied to my shoulders, a cage around my brain.