(no subject)

[etherealdespair]

I can't do this. I just can't. I'm going to fail these exams. I'm just not that person. I want to go home but if I go home I'll go to bed and never leave again. I won't get any work done and I so desperately need to. But this library, this building, is making my skin crawl. All the people, all the noises, it's making me so jumpy, so edgy. I need music, something loud and angry to block out the screaming in my head but my thoughts are so loud and whirling so fast and I don't have my walkman, it's at home where I can't go.

I'm not safe. Right now, in this state, I'm not safe and I'm not fit to practice. What the hell do I do? Do I hope it gets better before I graduate? I don't fucking know.

I'm going to fail the exams.