moment of weakness

[eternalpinecone]

Wow. wow wow wow. I never thought that I would end up talking to him of all people tonight. I had an absolutely awful day and my whole spring break so far has been generally shitty. So somewhere in the suckiness of today I just started missing him and everyone else was busy or I couldn't or didn't want to call them and then I started crying and dialed his number and then he was so eager to call me back and talk to me and now its 1:30 and we just got off the phone. It felt like talking to an old friend that still understands you completely. Maybe it was bad that I called, maybe it's bad that i've been thinking about him or missing him as much as I have, maybe i should have called the guy i'm supposed to call instead. But I dont really care because it felt like the right thing and it was good to talk to him and he said exactly what i wanted to hear that no one else would say to me. It didn't really make me miss him any more than I already did, so that's good. Sometimes I still wonder about him and about us. But really, I know that we can't be together and I'm content with what and who I have in my life now, so that's that. It's just nice to have someone get you, you know? like, really GET you, who YOU are. It's amazing. It really is.

I genuinely hope we can be friends. Because he is a good person and a person I would really like to have in my life.