Hope you are sitting down for this
Yeah. I'm posting an entry. Random moment tonight made me feel like checking.
I think, ill start off with an appology for those of my friends i've made on here. I think mainly Katie, and Christina. I know both of you sent me messages before asking where i was and how was i. I do feel bad for dissapearing. The past... oh wow, maybe year(?) have been difficult to find time for everything. Eventually i had to just... ditch old lifestyles and move on in life. AiM got switched to MSN, Livejournal became Myspace... which is gone now. I cant ever delete my Livejournal... theres so many memories and history that i want saved. I've considered copying every message into a notepad just in case Livejournal ever died.
I'm alright... i guess. A brief update.. since i forget what my last entries were about. Problems are never ending at my parents house. I have a job, working as a custodian at a local christian school. Life around the house has gotten pretty bad. My day went like this: Wake up, Feed Cats, Do Dishes, Sweep and Mop Kitchen Floor, Take trash to the road (Sundays), Sometimes Vaccum the rest of the house... by then its about 1:30pm... i find something to eat, then around 3:00 feed cats again, go to work, after work go to class, come home at about 9:15pm, do dishes, find some dinner, sweep/mop kitchen... and at about 10:30pm, i'm done. At that point im exagusted, and 1 to 2 hours im falling asleep. This doesnt include the random 5 things a day my mom would ask as a favour.
I might rant more about her later (yeah, i said it. i might come back and make another post)... but we had a huge fight... well, serveral fights throughout the time here. A recent fight grew into a physical fight. Of course i'd never hit back... and she was swinging for my head, so i put my arms up so my face wouldnt get hit, and in her fury she stumbled, fell into the doorway, and scraped her arm up... to this day she will tell you i shoved her down. It was a bad night. :(
A recent arguement though has opened up some hope. She bitched at me, i bitched back, she went off on me, i told her i wasnt listening, walked out the door and went to see my friends (at midnight)... come home at 4am and expected a note on the door saying "go find some other place to live" and the door locked, but it wasnt. instead, she typed 2 full pages as a rant on me. So, i felt the same could be done, so i emailed her a huge letter.. and said more than i should have. I told her how our family will never be good. It's always been doomed. Theres no way we can act like a caring family... so on so forth. Told her that for the past month now, i've been planning in depth to get an appartment with my friends and move out.
The next morning she was doing my chores, and told me that my letter really hurt her. She said "i didnt realize you were incapable of doing chores around here, so instead, i'm charging you rent"... and so i pay 25$ a week to stay here. And after 2 days so far, im really enjoying this deal. I had so much shit i had to do, that i had no time for myself. Its funny, i wake up late now, and think to myself "what am i gonna do this morning??" cause im so use to doing the routine chores... now, i have so much free time... its rediculous. :P
So i guess things are better. Not great, but its a start.
Oh, and because mayo did this... i'm gonna do it too.
Its a game. Put your music player on shuffle, and go through 30 songs... listing out the first line or so of the song. Then people guess what song it is. Cant cheat and use google or anything like that.
These are ALL very random just so you know.
1. This is the time to let them know who's side your on
2. All aboard, hit the road.
3. Lashing out the action, returning the reaction
4. Lately i've noticed how much you changed.
5. Dancing all alone singing dum de doo.
6. They found James Ambrose dead in his cell
7. Just Plug Me In Just Like I Was Eddie Harris
8. Remember when you were young
9. On the turning away, from the pain and troubles
10. Fuck you I'm through I want nothing more from you
11. The lunitic is on the grass
12. A cockroach in the concrete
13. I keep your face deep inside, try to hide
14. So happy, i have lost my edge
15. I woke up to a dream today
16. Everyday, we're one step closer to heaven
17. There is no teacher who can teach us anything new
18. And i'm a black rainbow
19. Long hair, big lips, little doll frame round her plastic tits
20. I've been changin but you'll never see me now.
21. You're giving me too many things Lately
22. I've got a bike you can ride it if you like
23. Josie you're my source of most frustration
24. Fuck all that we've got to get on with these
25. Can you feel that? Ah, shit
26. En nomine patris et fili et spiritus sancti <-- hah
27. furi hajimeta yuki ni tsutsumare nagara <-- Once again, hah.
28. I went outside to take a walk
29. Look at me, can't you see the tears i've cried for you
30. Make his fight on the hill in the early day
Good luck with that.
I think, ill start off with an appology for those of my friends i've made on here. I think mainly Katie, and Christina. I know both of you sent me messages before asking where i was and how was i. I do feel bad for dissapearing. The past... oh wow, maybe year(?) have been difficult to find time for everything. Eventually i had to just... ditch old lifestyles and move on in life. AiM got switched to MSN, Livejournal became Myspace... which is gone now. I cant ever delete my Livejournal... theres so many memories and history that i want saved. I've considered copying every message into a notepad just in case Livejournal ever died.
I'm alright... i guess. A brief update.. since i forget what my last entries were about. Problems are never ending at my parents house. I have a job, working as a custodian at a local christian school. Life around the house has gotten pretty bad. My day went like this: Wake up, Feed Cats, Do Dishes, Sweep and Mop Kitchen Floor, Take trash to the road (Sundays), Sometimes Vaccum the rest of the house... by then its about 1:30pm... i find something to eat, then around 3:00 feed cats again, go to work, after work go to class, come home at about 9:15pm, do dishes, find some dinner, sweep/mop kitchen... and at about 10:30pm, i'm done. At that point im exagusted, and 1 to 2 hours im falling asleep. This doesnt include the random 5 things a day my mom would ask as a favour.
I might rant more about her later (yeah, i said it. i might come back and make another post)... but we had a huge fight... well, serveral fights throughout the time here. A recent fight grew into a physical fight. Of course i'd never hit back... and she was swinging for my head, so i put my arms up so my face wouldnt get hit, and in her fury she stumbled, fell into the doorway, and scraped her arm up... to this day she will tell you i shoved her down. It was a bad night. :(
A recent arguement though has opened up some hope. She bitched at me, i bitched back, she went off on me, i told her i wasnt listening, walked out the door and went to see my friends (at midnight)... come home at 4am and expected a note on the door saying "go find some other place to live" and the door locked, but it wasnt. instead, she typed 2 full pages as a rant on me. So, i felt the same could be done, so i emailed her a huge letter.. and said more than i should have. I told her how our family will never be good. It's always been doomed. Theres no way we can act like a caring family... so on so forth. Told her that for the past month now, i've been planning in depth to get an appartment with my friends and move out.
The next morning she was doing my chores, and told me that my letter really hurt her. She said "i didnt realize you were incapable of doing chores around here, so instead, i'm charging you rent"... and so i pay 25$ a week to stay here. And after 2 days so far, im really enjoying this deal. I had so much shit i had to do, that i had no time for myself. Its funny, i wake up late now, and think to myself "what am i gonna do this morning??" cause im so use to doing the routine chores... now, i have so much free time... its rediculous. :P
So i guess things are better. Not great, but its a start.
Oh, and because mayo did this... i'm gonna do it too.
Its a game. Put your music player on shuffle, and go through 30 songs... listing out the first line or so of the song. Then people guess what song it is. Cant cheat and use google or anything like that.
These are ALL very random just so you know.
1. This is the time to let them know who's side your on
2. All aboard, hit the road.
3. Lashing out the action, returning the reaction
4. Lately i've noticed how much you changed.
5. Dancing all alone singing dum de doo.
6. They found James Ambrose dead in his cell
7. Just Plug Me In Just Like I Was Eddie Harris
8. Remember when you were young
9. On the turning away, from the pain and troubles
10. Fuck you I'm through I want nothing more from you
11. The lunitic is on the grass
12. A cockroach in the concrete
13. I keep your face deep inside, try to hide
14. So happy, i have lost my edge
15. I woke up to a dream today
16. Everyday, we're one step closer to heaven
17. There is no teacher who can teach us anything new
18. And i'm a black rainbow
19. Long hair, big lips, little doll frame round her plastic tits
20. I've been changin but you'll never see me now.
21. You're giving me too many things Lately
22. I've got a bike you can ride it if you like
23. Josie you're my source of most frustration
24. Fuck all that we've got to get on with these
25. Can you feel that? Ah, shit
26. En nomine patris et fili et spiritus sancti <-- hah
27. furi hajimeta yuki ni tsutsumare nagara <-- Once again, hah.
28. I went outside to take a walk
29. Look at me, can't you see the tears i've cried for you
30. Make his fight on the hill in the early day
Good luck with that.