The Omen (1995) + AHS: Delicate 12x06 Reviewed 👿😈👿😈👿😈
The Omen (1995)
A failed pilot starring Brett Cullen and William Sadler. It aired on NBC. Exposition makes it deteriorate drastically from minute 1. Unimaginably wretched. Evil is a possession or something. Silly music and diabolical events. Not appealingly weird, just portentous, sinister campiness. Julie Carmen (!) of In ‘The Mouth Of Madness‘ features in among the leaden monotony. No creative intent, makes ‘Omen IV‘ look like art. Richard Donner put his name to it as executive producer - but quickly denounced the episode as garbage. A series didn’t follow. Contention and stress and a bizarre er scene take place. It is Paddys Day. Entirely ineffectual. A bad situation all round. People do arrogance and self satisfied thinking. Evil does palpable rage. Cullen does soul weariness. Conspiracies afoot. Bacteria plays a plot point. Stupid beyond words.
Best Lines:
“DID IT TRY TO ENTER YOU?”
“Why must it always be the innocent?”
“Devour an entire army.”
“An omen!”
~
Opening Night
Shouldn’t a coherent narrative have emerged by now? Anna sees so much potential in hubby and is all: you connect with their soul and you know who they could be, who they should be. They’re not able to be who they’re meant to be or who they can be. This relationship could be so much more. They’ll never be their best selves and so you can stay and forever be in love with who they could possibly become one day or you know you could move on. You don’t want to waste your life and your time waiting for somebody waiting for them to grow into themselves because that may never happen. Anna is in love with the potential not the reality.
A glimpse into Anna's past reveals why she craves motherhood, while Dex's troubling family life is dragged into the spotlight. Anna is in perpetual crisis as walking yeast infection Kim plots a wicker man situation. Anna rejects rustication. Mens do serious misconduct. So highly deranged and twisted: immortal evil and fellatio-induced vehicular death before the 12 minute mark alone!
All sizzle, no stakes. Anna does not notice that her world is so tightly managed by others that even when she’s rebelling against one person’s agenda, she’s conforming to another’s. Drips with spooky symbolism and yet, somehow, zero actual meaning. Dex is preoccupied with his daddy issues. He meets up with his father, who is busy spending his son’s inheritance on his newest wife while his former wife attempts to sue him for satanic-ritual abuse.
Daddy assures Dex that his mother is batsh*t crazy, which does seem more plausible than the idea his country-club-bloviator father ever dabbled in anything so interesting as the occult. With more than a hint of menace, Mr. Harding promises Dex that he needn’t worry - Virginia’s suit will go away. If only Adrian Pasdar was cast in this!
Anna is in a fateful spot. Not dramatically compelling.
Best Line:
"Sonia's paintings are selling like fentanyl in an inner-city high school."
