i'm a junkie...
you tell yourself "no." you say it again and again. "no, i will not invade the vending machine." but the tummy grumbles. so you make a deal. "alright, i will only buy a certain type of candy bar." oh yes, that candy bar that you love, but you know is never in the vending machine. you take less than 30 steps to your enemy and look him straight in the eye, dollar in hand. "shit!" you notice that at the very heart of the machine a payday chocolatey avalanche is gunning you down. your one and only weakness. this never happens! there is never a chocolatey orgasm awaiting you! you cave and slide your dollar into the hole, never to see it again. the machine spits out your treat. 340 calories, 18 grams of fat, 32 grams of sugar... and a whole 6 grams of protein. you try to savor it, but find that you can't stop putting it back into your mouth until the entire length of it has disappeared down your throat. then the guilt comes. you only had an hour to wait until lunch, you little piggy. you tell yourself that you will exercise later, make dates with the gym, but know you are just lying to make yourself feel better. you have an addiction. you just can't get enough. how many chocolate covered nuts did you swallow today, you filthy, filthy girl? and you didn't even brush your teeth afterwards. you truly are disgusting. you get so depressed at your failure that you need comfort. a comfort only he can supply. you look to the machine... and the cycle continues.