methinks the end of this got deeper than i had anticipated
two things i wanted to discuss that formulated in my head on my commute in today.
starbucks. i admit it, i am a starbucks whore. i have no idea when, or how it happened. but i am. i rarely sway from my usual drink other than the size - a venti skim no water chai. god, what happened to me. but i adore my morning drink, it's a part of my ritual. i feel off if i don't have one. other tea doesn't seem to do it for me. i know it's expensive, and and and. but i have yet to find a substitute, and to be honest, i'm not really looking. i need an icon. or a 12 step. or both.
anyways. i have this reusable cup that actually looks like a starbucks cup, but it's a grande. i usually drink more than that. but they don't have one that's bigger, and i don't want to have to buy a new one. so this is my dilemma today, or was this morning. to go green(er) with my already consumer whore experience, or throw it all to the wind and get the venti that i really wanted.
guess what won out? if you guessed i had a dirty reusable cup, you guessed correctly. hey, at least i saved a nickel on top of the cheaper grande cost. :P
---
life choices. something else i easily admit - my life choices are sometimes very atypical, even if most of the people i'm around either share the same choices, or don't really care. specifically, i'm talking mostly about derby, tattoos, piercings, my costuming stuff, etc. i've even had someone give me crap about being a knitter before, as if being too crafty was a crime. a lot of time the people who give me crap are those at work that don't know me very well, or some people i'll meet in some other sort of group setting.
i'm a rather sensitive person in the heart of it all, even though i don't try to be, and a lot of times people will say things without really thinking. i get the following about all of the above on quite a regular basis these days:
-why would you DO that?
-what are you THINKING?
-what will your son think when he grows up?
-i can't wait until you regret that/hurt yourself.
i just don't understand. i try not to judge, but it happens - i'm not foolish enough to think i do not also cast stones. but i guess i don't understand sometimes the absolute failure to see things from another perspective. and it's not the people who are genuinely asking questions that i mind. it's the ones with a hidden agenda, the one that says, NORMAL PEOPLE DO NOT DO THOSE THINGS behind what they say. the ones that seem to hope for me to fail because then i will come to my senses, and do something more normal with my time
i do the things i do because i, clearly, find enjoyment in them. and isn't that what we all look for? things that make us happy, that make us more of who we are, and of who we want to be? i have decided i am, more and more, unapologetic about who i am. regardless of what others think. no one has to get on board with me (although i respect my husband enough to discuss major changes to body and activities prior to beginning, of course), and no one has to like the things i do. but i respectfully retain the right to challenge your viewpoint, to not have to explain myself, or to be offended based on how you choose to question who i am.
alex will love me because i am his mother. i hope to teach him that everyone is different, and that differences are to be embraced - not ridiculed, not something to use as a weapon to cut others down. he will know that you can have tattoos and piercings, and still be a stand up, respectable member of society. that girls can also participate in full contact sports and if they break a bone? they heal. just like the boys do. and i can only hope i am strong enough to continue teaching him these things as regularly and consistently as i can muster.
chances are, however, if you're reading this, you are not one of the above.
starbucks. i admit it, i am a starbucks whore. i have no idea when, or how it happened. but i am. i rarely sway from my usual drink other than the size - a venti skim no water chai. god, what happened to me. but i adore my morning drink, it's a part of my ritual. i feel off if i don't have one. other tea doesn't seem to do it for me. i know it's expensive, and and and. but i have yet to find a substitute, and to be honest, i'm not really looking. i need an icon. or a 12 step. or both.
anyways. i have this reusable cup that actually looks like a starbucks cup, but it's a grande. i usually drink more than that. but they don't have one that's bigger, and i don't want to have to buy a new one. so this is my dilemma today, or was this morning. to go green(er) with my already consumer whore experience, or throw it all to the wind and get the venti that i really wanted.
guess what won out? if you guessed i had a dirty reusable cup, you guessed correctly. hey, at least i saved a nickel on top of the cheaper grande cost. :P
---
life choices. something else i easily admit - my life choices are sometimes very atypical, even if most of the people i'm around either share the same choices, or don't really care. specifically, i'm talking mostly about derby, tattoos, piercings, my costuming stuff, etc. i've even had someone give me crap about being a knitter before, as if being too crafty was a crime. a lot of time the people who give me crap are those at work that don't know me very well, or some people i'll meet in some other sort of group setting.
i'm a rather sensitive person in the heart of it all, even though i don't try to be, and a lot of times people will say things without really thinking. i get the following about all of the above on quite a regular basis these days:
-why would you DO that?
-what are you THINKING?
-what will your son think when he grows up?
-i can't wait until you regret that/hurt yourself.
i just don't understand. i try not to judge, but it happens - i'm not foolish enough to think i do not also cast stones. but i guess i don't understand sometimes the absolute failure to see things from another perspective. and it's not the people who are genuinely asking questions that i mind. it's the ones with a hidden agenda, the one that says, NORMAL PEOPLE DO NOT DO THOSE THINGS behind what they say. the ones that seem to hope for me to fail because then i will come to my senses, and do something more normal with my time
i do the things i do because i, clearly, find enjoyment in them. and isn't that what we all look for? things that make us happy, that make us more of who we are, and of who we want to be? i have decided i am, more and more, unapologetic about who i am. regardless of what others think. no one has to get on board with me (although i respect my husband enough to discuss major changes to body and activities prior to beginning, of course), and no one has to like the things i do. but i respectfully retain the right to challenge your viewpoint, to not have to explain myself, or to be offended based on how you choose to question who i am.
alex will love me because i am his mother. i hope to teach him that everyone is different, and that differences are to be embraced - not ridiculed, not something to use as a weapon to cut others down. he will know that you can have tattoos and piercings, and still be a stand up, respectable member of society. that girls can also participate in full contact sports and if they break a bone? they heal. just like the boys do. and i can only hope i am strong enough to continue teaching him these things as regularly and consistently as i can muster.
chances are, however, if you're reading this, you are not one of the above.