please help
Or: stop the world I'd like to get off.
I am not okay right now.
That's a really hard sentence to write, ngl. But I'm not. I've tried to be, and I've tried to put on my brave face and smile and what have you, but right now I am just. There's just too much going on and it's not helping anything.
Everyone at work is leaving. To be expected, with the store closing, but not having the crew I enjoy working with makes it harder to go in, and makes it harder to have support irl.
And then of course, there's the Jeep. The fundraiser has managed to bring in a shade over $1000 now, but that's still $2000 to go and no real way to bring it in unless the bank approves the loan I applied for yesterday by some miracle. (My credit is fine, but my income is not once they factor in the fake rent amount they were required to put on the paperwork. I don't know why "occupy with no rent" is unacceptable, but it was.)
And well. Knowing that if I don't get the Jeep fixed, I will become jobless (obviously) is its own special brand of panic-inducing stress. I can't go to interviews while sharing the piece of shit car with my brother and my mom (especially now that he's working in the city too) and it's hard to get both of us to work and back because we work opposite schedules. (Close enough that he can drop me off at 9am, at least, but.)
I'm scared. The work thing was scary enough before I found out I had to replace an entire engine, and this has just been so much worse. And on top of that, I'm not sleeping much because of all this anxiety. It's... not fun.
I know I asked in the last post, but I'm begging again. If you can, please donate to my gofundme. If you can't donate, please share the link.
gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/jenis-emergency-car-repairs
or you can send directly through paypal: paypal.me/eeriansadow
Now, I'm going to go write some fanfiction and hopefully sleep a little more than I have been tonight.
this originally came from my Dreamwidth account! http://eerian-sadow.dreamwidth.org/
I am not okay right now.
That's a really hard sentence to write, ngl. But I'm not. I've tried to be, and I've tried to put on my brave face and smile and what have you, but right now I am just. There's just too much going on and it's not helping anything.
Everyone at work is leaving. To be expected, with the store closing, but not having the crew I enjoy working with makes it harder to go in, and makes it harder to have support irl.
And then of course, there's the Jeep. The fundraiser has managed to bring in a shade over $1000 now, but that's still $2000 to go and no real way to bring it in unless the bank approves the loan I applied for yesterday by some miracle. (My credit is fine, but my income is not once they factor in the fake rent amount they were required to put on the paperwork. I don't know why "occupy with no rent" is unacceptable, but it was.)
And well. Knowing that if I don't get the Jeep fixed, I will become jobless (obviously) is its own special brand of panic-inducing stress. I can't go to interviews while sharing the piece of shit car with my brother and my mom (especially now that he's working in the city too) and it's hard to get both of us to work and back because we work opposite schedules. (Close enough that he can drop me off at 9am, at least, but.)
I'm scared. The work thing was scary enough before I found out I had to replace an entire engine, and this has just been so much worse. And on top of that, I'm not sleeping much because of all this anxiety. It's... not fun.
I know I asked in the last post, but I'm begging again. If you can, please donate to my gofundme. If you can't donate, please share the link.
gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/jenis-emergency-car-repairs
or you can send directly through paypal: paypal.me/eeriansadow
Now, I'm going to go write some fanfiction and hopefully sleep a little more than I have been tonight.
this originally came from my Dreamwidth account! http://eerian-sadow.dreamwidth.org/