Deliberately wasting your time

[e_over_m]

The whole store is on a budget, so our stocks of everything are running pretty low (especially yesterday, a Sunday, when we don't get any deliveries). So although I was kidding when I started this job and made references to the cheese-shop sketch, it's starting to ring true.

"Do you have the Jennie-O Roasted Turkey?"
"No, we ran out on Friday."
"Smoked turkey?"
"No, we might get more tomorrow..."
"Cracked-pepper turkey?"
"No."
"Honey-maple turkey?"
"No."
"Honey-maple ham?"
"No."
"Mortadella?"
"No, not for the past three weeks."
"Pepper salami? Garlic salami? Gipsy salami? Parmesano? German or Hungarian salami?"
"Let me check....nnno."
"Head cheese?"
"No, ew."
"Proscuitto di Parma?"
"I'm sure I saw some...oh, the cat's eaten it."