eyes crossed towards the self
The sun actually came out today. I don't know if it's connected, but I actually had energy to get stuff done. Did some dish washin' and kitchen scrubbin' and floor sweepin' and laundry runnin'. Yee haw.
I've been struggling lately with not knowing how to evaluate my progress in my vocation. You don't get progress reports in the housewife biz. And comparing yourself to other housewives is a tricky game. Is it fair to compare myself to X, who (advantage side) has a penchant for organization, tons of storage space and a chest freezer but (disadvantage side) has twin toddlers and a much bigger house to keep clean? How about Y, who cleans awesome but can't cook for beans? Or Z, whose house looks like a war zone but whose children are polite, well-behaved, and well-educated?
Housewifin' is just too fluid, too many factors, to really compare yourself like that. Plus, there's the issue that families don't define success the same way. The Husband got really anxious when he felt that I was relying too much on convenience food and not cooking from scratch enough. For another family, seven days a week of Chicken Voila, deli meals, frozen pizza and take out would not have anyone complaining. I know for sure that a lot of housewives would probably come into my apartment right now, side-eye me and say "You say you've been CLEANING all day..?"
Yes. Yes I have.
The book A Mother's Rule of Life suggests attaching yourself to some Older and Wiser matron to give you a reality check. I know of a few (related to, at my parish, etc) but there is just something so awkward about being all "BE MY HOUSEWIFE SENSEI". How do you lead up to that?
I guess it's similar to something I wrote on another topic on a friend's blog. I try to evaluate myself and analyze problems, but every mitigating factor feels like making excuses, and every judgment on myself feels like being scrupulous (overly self-condemnatory, for those who don't speak Catholic).
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I'm concerned about Pippa's eye because it's still wandering sometimes. According to the ophthalmologist, it takes weeks for children to get used to bifocals, and it's not something that can be taught, actually it's bad to try to teach them to look through them a certain way because that causes the focusing/strain problems we're trying to combat. So that's why her follow-up appointment isn't until December.
I'm just worried about it because if it doesn't work we'll be talking about surgery. And I read a blog article today by a mom whose daughter had the surgery done, and unfortunately the surgery made things worse, giving the daughter a permanent cross instead of an intermittent cross.
Every time I see her eye cross it makes my heart sink.
I've been struggling lately with not knowing how to evaluate my progress in my vocation. You don't get progress reports in the housewife biz. And comparing yourself to other housewives is a tricky game. Is it fair to compare myself to X, who (advantage side) has a penchant for organization, tons of storage space and a chest freezer but (disadvantage side) has twin toddlers and a much bigger house to keep clean? How about Y, who cleans awesome but can't cook for beans? Or Z, whose house looks like a war zone but whose children are polite, well-behaved, and well-educated?
Housewifin' is just too fluid, too many factors, to really compare yourself like that. Plus, there's the issue that families don't define success the same way. The Husband got really anxious when he felt that I was relying too much on convenience food and not cooking from scratch enough. For another family, seven days a week of Chicken Voila, deli meals, frozen pizza and take out would not have anyone complaining. I know for sure that a lot of housewives would probably come into my apartment right now, side-eye me and say "You say you've been CLEANING all day..?"
Yes. Yes I have.
The book A Mother's Rule of Life suggests attaching yourself to some Older and Wiser matron to give you a reality check. I know of a few (related to, at my parish, etc) but there is just something so awkward about being all "BE MY HOUSEWIFE SENSEI". How do you lead up to that?
I guess it's similar to something I wrote on another topic on a friend's blog. I try to evaluate myself and analyze problems, but every mitigating factor feels like making excuses, and every judgment on myself feels like being scrupulous (overly self-condemnatory, for those who don't speak Catholic).
---
I'm concerned about Pippa's eye because it's still wandering sometimes. According to the ophthalmologist, it takes weeks for children to get used to bifocals, and it's not something that can be taught, actually it's bad to try to teach them to look through them a certain way because that causes the focusing/strain problems we're trying to combat. So that's why her follow-up appointment isn't until December.
I'm just worried about it because if it doesn't work we'll be talking about surgery. And I read a blog article today by a mom whose daughter had the surgery done, and unfortunately the surgery made things worse, giving the daughter a permanent cross instead of an intermittent cross.
Every time I see her eye cross it makes my heart sink.