Looking for techniques | Spencer/Brendon | NC-17 | AU |

[disarm_d]

Looking for techniques
Spencer/Brendon | NC-17 | ~ 8000 words | AU |
Spencer can't believe himself for trying something like this. He can't believe that he'd risk his friendship with Brendon, his friendships with everyone else if Brendon decided to tell, his place in the school if Brendon caused enough fuss. Except that when Brendon's tongue

Comments

[airgiodslv]

Oh god. I think this broke me, completely, in a way very few things ever have. I don't even know where to begin.

Okay. Yes. The sense of the taboo was stronger in this piece than I have ever read it before, anywhere. We take a lot for granted now, even with the political climate still shifting, because it isn't ingrained in us like it was for people even one generation ago, how forbidden it was, how utterly anathema. It wasn't just that I was hyperaware of the door possibly opening every time they were together, the idea that Ryan knew Spencer well enough to guess, the danger of someone calling them on it. It was that they knew all of these things, and then on an even deeper level they were afraid of doing something they knew was wrong. What they were afraid of half the time wasn't even discovery, it was their own feelings, because those feelings were not acceptable to have. That hit me harder than anything else, how deeply they believed, and of course they did, they were raised by families who believe it, in a culture that

[airgiodslv]

I loved that the focus on them was so tight, because even though Jon and Ryan were there in support, and used well, I really felt like the rest of the world had ceased to exist, and all there was for these two people in the whole entire world was each other. Even when they were apart, even when they knew they shouldn't be thinking about it, there was still nothing else in their minds. I was completely grounded in Spencer's pov, totally, but there was still no doubt in my mind that Brendon felt exactly the same way he did, that they were both struggling with the exact same conflicts and desires and fears. You showed it in their words, in the way they finished each other's sentences and danced around the subject so clearly on their minds, and with every single millisecond of physical contact between them. Because every one mattered so much; their elbows bumping together was as damning as a kiss. Thinking about something like sex, being naked together, was so out of the question it never even crossed Spencer's mind, wasn't allowed to

[sparktastic]

Um.

What she said.

*sends flowers*

[disarm_d]

\o/

:)

[disarm_d]

There's nothing I can say to tell you how amazing this comment is. I just-- Oh man! This is one of the most fantastic comments I've ever received, and it seriously means so much to me and THANK YOU.

You got absolutely everything that I was hoping would come across. It was just the most incredible thing to read your comment, and I know I'm going to be coming back to read it again and again. I know that I'm not able to convey how much it meant to me, but I hope that you get some idea, because. WOW. Thank you thank you thank you!

then on an even deeper level they were afraid of doing something they knew was wrong YES. Yes yes yes!

I can't even tell you how fantastic it was to read this:And you showed that in the most gorgeous way possible, with the smallest details like Spencer watching Brendon's forearms, just that being able to make him feel things he shouldn't, and it was so much more powerful than him seeing Brendon half-naked from a shower and being aroused, for instance, because just that tiny amount, those little tastes