Dear Cat:

Perhaps I am incorrect in this, but it is my assumption that there are only two of you home during the day. As it stands, I scoop your box twice a day: before I leave for work and before I go to bed. That means today, when I left the house, your box was devoid of anything but lovely blue crystals. However, when I came home, it was full. ( Read more... )

 
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Dear Cat ( Read more... )

Dear Cat:

Perhaps you have noticed something different about the last few days. Namely, I have been home and usually I am not. I am also spending a lot of time laying around on the couch and eating such foreign delights as Chicken Noodle Soup. I realize you are under the impression that this is completely for you pleasure and convenience, but ( Read more... )

Dear Cat ( Read more... )

Dear Cat ( Read more... )

Dear Cat (and for once, it's not Goddammit ( Read more... )

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I'm sitting here on the couch, chilling out, and suddenly, I hear nomming. So I look up and there's the cat, snarfing down something as quick as possible, because I so might steal it. I'm like that ( Read more... )

We seemed to have reached another impasse, Cat. It seems, in the last few weeks, you have decided that if I get within 5 feet of you, I am going to develop fangs and EAT YOUR SOUL. This is not true, but since it keeps you out from underfoot in the Unholy Early™, I am also not inclined to really make an effort to change your mind ( Read more... )