you can never predict the weather
Today is the last day of May, which means that summer is just around the corner. That being the case, you'd figure it would be warm and sunny...but alas, it is cold and cloudy. Weather reports say I should get used to the clouds. It will rain off and on this week, and regardless will stay cold. Checking the weather for Las Vegas and it's gonna be in the high 90s all week, with plenty of sunshine. I've had a couple of isolated thoughts this past week that perhaps I came home too soon. I came home because I was lonely and felt suddenly too isolated even for my tolerences, but perhaps I jumped the gun. I didn't start thinking of coming home until just a few days before I did. It was an impulse, and one perhaps I should have tried to restrain. Not that i'm thinking of going back; that ship has sailed. Just after the relief of being back I am facing what I knew leaving Las Vegas I must inevitably encounter here: that familiar feeling of purposelessness that seems to singularly characterize my existence.
There is no more apt illustration of said purposelessness than my perpetual habiation of my parents house. Of course, I cannot stay here forever, nor do I wish to. It bewilders my parents and others that I have the ready means to leave yet do not do so. But what would be different living elsewhere? It's not as though my activities would change in the slightest. Still, I suppose it's a thing which must be done for its own sake. Adults after a certain age do not live with their mommy and daddy without some excuse.
Tom lived in Chico for a few years while going to school there. After dropping out he moved back to the Bay Area and lived with his parents for a while playing poker. His parents are not as approving of his avocation as mine are, so he moved out. Unfortunately, he has not been as successful as I have, and hasn't been able to afford his own place. At present he rents a room in the house of a childhood friend for $250 a month. It's a generous arrangement, yet one which he loathes. Why does he want his own place? For women, he says.
Well, enough of that. Today at 1.30pm i'm playing in a $50k tourney online. Tom won a free seat to this tourney and prevailed upon my to play it. He's in LA this weekend (and getting killed at the Commerce appearantly), so he asked me to play the tourney for him. We'll split any prize 50/50 (he suggested 60/40 in my favor...). 1st place is $12k. I wouldn't mind half of that.
There is no more apt illustration of said purposelessness than my perpetual habiation of my parents house. Of course, I cannot stay here forever, nor do I wish to. It bewilders my parents and others that I have the ready means to leave yet do not do so. But what would be different living elsewhere? It's not as though my activities would change in the slightest. Still, I suppose it's a thing which must be done for its own sake. Adults after a certain age do not live with their mommy and daddy without some excuse.
Tom lived in Chico for a few years while going to school there. After dropping out he moved back to the Bay Area and lived with his parents for a while playing poker. His parents are not as approving of his avocation as mine are, so he moved out. Unfortunately, he has not been as successful as I have, and hasn't been able to afford his own place. At present he rents a room in the house of a childhood friend for $250 a month. It's a generous arrangement, yet one which he loathes. Why does he want his own place? For women, he says.
Well, enough of that. Today at 1.30pm i'm playing in a $50k tourney online. Tom won a free seat to this tourney and prevailed upon my to play it. He's in LA this weekend (and getting killed at the Commerce appearantly), so he asked me to play the tourney for him. We'll split any prize 50/50 (he suggested 60/40 in my favor...). 1st place is $12k. I wouldn't mind half of that.